IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE
by Dan Ingram
Summary: When the XMen save Wolfsbane from horrible medical experiments, they help her recover her life and decide what should be done with the results of those inhuman experiments. Do the ends justify the means? Contains rape and many other bad things RR
1. Rescue

Points of Continuity. X-Stacy has joined the X-Men but they haven't met the X-Corps yet, Genosha has been destroyed and Cassandra Nova has been defeated without much problem or revelations besides the school and the professor going public. No viruses, or Professor X in a bald female body, No Phoenix and certainly no Thundercats Beast. The X-Men have encountered and fought the U-Men. The new Angel won't show in this fanfic, really so her fate doesn't matter. Cecilia Reyes is working at the school as a doctor and part time X-Man. Basically; this is a stand-alone story so present continuity doesn't play a big part of it.  
  
Other points. The following contains some very disturbing content. If you are a fan of Wolfsbane, you may or may not want to read this. The following is harsh, but intended to be thought provoking. You have been warned. Also, there will be A LOT of angst.  
  
Feedback=Please? Pretty please? Any and all comments are welcomed.  
  
Archive? Sure, just ask first.  
  
Disclaimer, Not mine in any way.  
  
Anyone under 18? Go away, you'll thank me.  
  
*= Telepathic conversation - = Thoughts/internal monologue, -Like this-  
  
Chapter 1, The Rescue  
  
Xavier's Institution for Higher Learning, Virginia.  
  
Professor Xavier, leader and founder of the uncanny X-Men, was having a poor day. So much had happened now in his life so fast. Genosha, an island nation of mutants, had been almost completely destroyed by a mad woman before the X-Men stopped her. He revealed himself and his school to the public and had uncovered a secret organization that was trafficking in stolen mutant organs calling themselves. But not all the events in the past few months were tragic. Cyclops, who was believed dead, was found alive and saved from a mad man. The legacy virus, a plague which had been killing mutants the world over, had been cured, but at a heavy personal cost. One of his students, Colossus, had given his life to activate the cure. But that burden was easier to bear, due to the fact that Colossus had willingly given up his life. But another old friend had been killed in the process of discovering a cure, as well.  
  
-She shouldn't have died. She worked selflessly to help both humans and mutants. - He thought bitterly.  
  
Moira MacTaggert, one of Xavier's oldest and closest friends, had been killed in the process of finding a cure for the Legacy Virus. And though it had been well over twelve weeks since Moira had died, but Charles Xavier was still having a hard time dealing with it. He had known Moira for well over twenty years, and was very close with her. Had it not been for Cable and Jean Grey, in fact, he would have willingly died along with her. Sometimes, he wished he had. But he found the strength to carry on. Most days, he could bear the loss. But today was a little harder than most. Today would have been Moira's birthday.  
  
-I remember when I used to call her and wish her happy birthday. We would spend nearly an hour reminiscing about the 'old times'- He thought to himself. Despite how she left him long ago, he still loved her dearly. But since he couldn't talk to her anymore, he decided he should do something else. Something that Moira would want. He would call and offer his comfort to Rahne Sinclair, Moira's foster daughter.  
  
-I can't imagine what that poor girl is going thru now. To be orphaned twice at such a young age- He sighed. He knew it wasn't going to be easy, talking to Rahne, but when was his life ever easy?  
  
The last time he had seen Rahne was at Moira's funeral. She was weeping so hard she had trouble standing. Although he hadn't gotten the chance to talk to her at the funeral, he had learned that she was going to stay with her friend Danielle Moonstar for a few days before moving in with a cousin of Moira's to sort out her life. Xavier flipped thru his phone book, looking for the number. As he picked up the phone, he thought about what he would say to his former student.  
  
-How do I help her with her grief when I haven't come to terms with mine?- he asked himself. He hesitated as he started to dial, but decided at the very least he owed to Moira to look after her foster daughter. It's what she would have wanted.  
  
"Kinross Manor, this is the house keeper speakin'."  
  
"Yes, my name is Professor Xavier. I was calling to speak with Rahne Sinclair. I understand she is staying there."  
  
"She's nae here sir. She sent word that she would be returning to school in america. Ms. Kinross didn't mind much sir; she was never takin' much with that mutie girl. She thought Lady Moira wasn't right in the head fur adoptin' her. Anythin' else I can help you with, sir?"  
  
"No, thank you, ma'am." As Xavier hung the phone, he couldn't help but be reminded why he never hired a real housekeeper. They gossip like housewives.  
  
-It's not like Rahne to lie to anyone. I specifically remember hearing her tell Kurt where she would be staying. But, where can she be? She doesn't have many places to go. She certainly wouldn't return to Craig- He thought to himself,- I wonder...-  
  
Xavier next dialed his accountant's number. Before she had died, Moira had set up her will so that Xavier would keep Moira's multi million dollar estate in a trust for Rahne until she had turned twenty-one. Moira didn't feel that Rahne was old enough to handle all that responsibility just yet, and she trusted Xavier to do what was right for her daughter. She did however, put aside a large amount of money in a 'slush' fund that Rahne could use as she saw fit and that Xavier would oversee and manage for her until she had turned twenty-one. One call to his accountant revealed that the money hadn't been touched since Moira first established the trust fund.  
  
-Perhaps she's staying with one of her friends- He thought to himself. He looked thru his phone book again and looked up the number of another former student of his, Danielle Moonstar, now attending college. She was good friends with Rahne, even with everything that had happened over the years, and was certain to know where Rahne was. Something about this just didn't feel right. Something in the back of his mind, that he just couldn't place. He put that out of his mind as he dialed Moonstar's number.  
  
"Hello?" Xavier was relieved as he heard the voice of his old student.  
  
"Dani, this is Professor X. Have you spoken to Rahne lately? I was hoping to speak to her, but I haven't been able to reach her." He said. He tried to hide the concern in his voice.  
  
"The last time I saw her was a few months ago at the airport. I haven't heard from her since then. She told me that she was going to stay with a cousin of Moira's for a little bit. Why do you ask? Do you think something is wrong?"  
  
"No, it's nothing. Thank you, Dani." Xavier hung up the phone and thought for a moment. Something was wrong, he could feel it, but he didn't wish to distress his former student until he knew something for a fact. He left his office and headed towards the elevator. As he walked thru the halls, past all his new students, he thought about how things had changed from the 'old days'. He was no longer teaching only a handful of students, but rather reaching out and helping more mutants than ever before. It would take some getting used to, though. As he descended into the sub basement of the mansion, his thoughts drifted back to Rahne.  
  
-Where could she be? Rahne isn't a girl to run off and not tell anyone. The poor child doesn't have much family, so why on earth would she run out on them? Could something have happened to her? - He became more and more worried as he wheeled himself to Cerebro. Something was wrong, he certain of it now. He placed the control helmet on his head and started to power up Cerebro. It needed a few seconds to be able to scan the world, and he didn't see any need to be less than thorough in his search for Rahne.  
  
"Somethin' wrong, Chuck?"  
  
The voice startled Xavier, but he barely turned his head as he ran his hands over the controls of Cerebro, checking every instrument to make sure that it was in working order. He knew of only one man in the world who could sneak up on him(and would call him Chuck).  
  
"I have been attempting to reach Rahne Sinclair, Logan, but I have been unable to find her. I'm a little concerned about her, so I have decided to use Cerebro to find her."  
  
"That's kinda overkill, don't you think? She may just want some time alone. The poor kid took Moira's death kinda hard, all things considered. You sure she wants to be found?" Logan asked as he pulled out a cigar.  
  
"I thought she lost her powers when that shape shifting bitch Mystique attacked Muir Island, anyways."  
  
"She did. However, Mystique used a weapon of Forge, her former lover. He was easily able to restore her powers. Now, please, give me a moment to concentrate."  
  
As Xavier started to scan the planet, a holographic globe appeared before the two. Within a few minutes, the globe turned and revealed two bright red spots somewhere over the Pacific Ocean, indicating where Rahne was.  
  
"Who's that second dot?" Logan asked.  
  
"I can't say. It appears that she's with a superhuman of some sort. I'll run a search thru Cerebro's memory bank, to see if I can identify the other signature."  
  
"Don't bother." Logan said coldly. Xavier looked up, and saw that there was now only one light on the map. Xavier didn't say a word, but reached out his powerful telepathy to scan where Rahne had been located. Despite the fact that his power was increased dramatically by Cerebro, he found his scans were completely blocked.  
  
"Something is preventing me from scanning the island where Rahne has been detected. Summon Kurt and the others immediately, I fear we have already lost too much time." Xavier said, not even trying to hide his fear. Logan turned to leave, but Xavier stopped him for a moment.  
  
"Take Jean with you. If another telepath is blocking my probes, you may need her power and skill." He said. Logan just nodded his head in response.  
  
-Please god; let us not be to late- Xavier prayed. He had lost far too many students already, and he certainly didn't want to lose another.  
  
***  
  
"So what's your research say about the island, Warren? Anything we should know?" Logan asked as he piloted the X-Men's black bird to the coordinates provided by Cerebro. He didn't like going into a situation blind, so he had Angel make some calls. If the head of a multi million dollar company couldn't dig up some dirt, who could?  
  
"According to my sources, the island that Cerebro pinpointed Rahne on is owned by multi-national drug company called Hermes, Inc. I know the founder personally, his name's John Calvin, he's donated millions to charity and helped build hospitals all over the third world. He's very old money, but that has never stopped him from trying to help others. He's also one of the most respected surgeons in the world." Warren replied.  
  
"So kidnapping little girls is outside of his normal behavior, huh?" X- Stacy said jokingly.  
  
"That wasn't funny." Nightcrawler said harshly, "What could they want vith Rahne?" Nightcrawler was far more concerned about the young woman's welfare than any of the others. He knew Rahne personally, from when she was a member of his team Excalibur and loved her like a little sister. The fact she might be in danger was torture for as far as Kurt was concerned, Rahne had already suffered enough for two lifetimes. If anything had happened to her...He would make them pay, priest or not.  
  
"We're about to find out. We'll be over the island in a second. I'm gonna buzz the island with the cloak on. They won't see us, but we'll see them." Wolverine said. He took the black bird down and over the island. The island looked like a normal tropical island, devoid of human life, with the exception a twenty story building in the center of it, built into the bedrock.  
  
"That's going to be one tough nut to crack." Iceman said.  
  
Wolverine landed the jet in a clear field about a mile away from the complex. The X-Men didn't waste a moment, immediately leaving the plane and heading towards the main building. Wolverine thought that they should use stealth, so instead of Jean flying them in, they decided to hoof it thru the forest. For most of the X-Men, it wasn't a problem. They had trained most of their lives and were as physically fit as some professional athletes. But Stacy-X wasn't like most X-Men.  
  
-Huff, I didn't sign up with this outfit to run thru forests! - She cursed. The others were too far ahead of her now, X-Stacy just couldn't keep up. She was in good shape, but not compared to the other X-Men.  
  
"Huff wait... up guys!" She yelled. Much to her surprise, the team had stopped cold.  
  
"Thanks, huff, I...was getting a little winded." She said as she caught up. Oddly enough, the entire team was ignoring her. They seemed focused on what they saw in the ground. Stacy-X then saw what they were looking it. A human foot was sticking out of the ground, while a few feet away from it; a decomposed human hand was slightly protruding out of the ground as well. The area had been cleared of leaves recently, and the ground was still soft. Stacy-X had seen enough reports on T.V to recognize what it was.  
  
"It's a god damn mass grave." Logan said grimly. He had seen them before in World War Two and Cambodia, among other places, but he had never gotten used to seeing them. He never hoped too either...  
  
* Never though I'd be so glad not to have a mouth...* Chamber said telepathically.  
  
"Is Rahne...in there?" Jean asked fearfully.  
  
"Not according to the portable cerebro we brought with us. She's still alive, and in that building." Angel said, trying to reassure his old friend. He tried not to let on how sick he felt.  
  
"And if she's goin' to stay that way, bub, we need to get our asses in gear."  
  
"What about all these people? We can't just leave them here!" Iceman said.  
  
"Don't worry, we'll come back and make sure they all get a proper burial. But our concern has to be with the living right now, and keepin' 'em that way." Wolverine said. –We'll also make those bastards pay for what they did to these people-  
  
-Hold on Rahne, we're coming for you. - Nightcrawler thought to himself. The fear in his gut was far worse now, but he tried hard not to think about what could be happening to Rahne now. The idea that someone could be torturing Rahne, or worse was almost too much to bear. Once they were within eyesight of the building, Wolverine outlined the plan of attack.  
  
"According to the cerebro we brought, Rahne's on the tenth floor, and is the only mutant or superhuman there. So here's what we're going to do. Jeanie, you're going to break inside with Bobby and Kurt. Your telepathy should prevent anyone one from spotting you. You find Rahne, and keep her safe at all costs. The rest of us are going to take out the cannon fodder and meet you up there. Got it?"  
  
"It's a complex plan, but I think we'll manage." Iceman joked, trying to break the tension. Wolverine didn't respond, he just gave Iceman an ugly look.  
  
Without saying a word, Jean levitated her two teammates to the floor where Rahne was being held while preventing them from being seen by anyone on the ground. Iceman froze the wall to sub zero temperatures, and Jean gave it a slight telekinetic push, easily shattering it. There were two guards directly behind the wall, but Nightcrawler teleported quickly and punched them out before they could raise their weapons, ending their threat. The three X-Men looked around at the room they were in and felt sick to their stomachs. The room was filled with surgical supplies, but the floor covered in dried blood, and the shelves were covered with organs, from lungs and eyes, to hearts to brains. In fact, one jar looked like it had an over- sized cat's tail in it.  
  
"What the hell happened here?" Iceman asked as he fought to keep his breakfast, and every other meal he had ever eaten, in his stomach. The site of alone was enough to disturb anyone, but the room smelled like a combination of rubbing alcohol and rotting meat.  
  
"Lets answer that after we find our friend first, okay? We have to search this entire floor, so spread out. I've telepathically knocked out everyone on this floor and telekinetically sealed it off as well, but we still shouldn't waste a second." Jean said. The psi-dampeners in the building were powerful, and she didn't know how long she could hold it.  
  
The three X-Men spread out and started going thru each room, looking for their friend. Everything they found sickened them even more, but they pushed on.  
  
-Omega Wing? I don't think I even want to know.-Iceman thought to himself as he entered one door. The room was cold, and Iceman knew instantly where he was. The morgue. He pulled the sheet off of one the bodies and was appalled by what he saw. It was the body of a young white male with blond hair, with scars and stitches all over his body. He was missing his left hand, and looked like he had been tortured before he had died. His body was covered with stitches and wounds that looked like they had been infected. Worse, he even recognized the man.  
  
-It's Wildchild, that mini- Sabretooth who joined X-Factor! What's he doing here? -  
  
Iceman looked at another body, and read the toe tag. It looked like the other man had died just as painfully as Wildchild, but he was much taller with a heavier set.  
  
-Subject: Jack Flag. Baseline human with enhanced strength and healing factor. What on earth were they doing here? -.  
  
He looked around further and saw two more bodies, which he could see were female. He pulled the sheet back to reveal the face and Iceman immediately threw up. It wasn't just the fact that he could tell that the woman had it been tortured just by looking at her face, though that was bad enough. But he also knew her personally. It was Marrow, a one time X-man and teammate.  
  
-Why is she here? Last I heard she was attending college in New York!-  
  
Iceman took a few seconds to collect himself and looked at the final slab, and saw fur underneath it. Screwing up his courage, Iceman pulled back the sheet covering the face of the second female, and though he was ashamed to admit it, was relieved to discover that it wasn't Rahne. It was Feral, a human mutant hybrid who had been a member of X-Force and former mutant terrorist.  
  
"Mein friends, I found her!" Kurt yelled. Iceman pulled the covers back and raced to Kurt. What he saw was just as appalling as what was in the morgue. Rahne was strapped down to nude a bed, with long scars and bruises all over her body. Her hair was shaved off and the bandage on her head was covered in dried blood. Her lower left leg had an open wound, along with her right fore arm and Iceman could tell from the men, who looked to be doctors, lying unconscious next to the bed that they were performing some kind of obscene experiments on her.  
  
"What were they doing to her?"  
  
"They were dissecting her, examining how her transformational powers affected her physiology in her human form and determining how much trauma her body can withstand before going into shock." Jean explained.  
  
"Why in gods name would they do that?"  
  
"According to what I read in their minds they think it's something important to compare against other factors. I don't really much care right now. I need you two to cover me for a minute. Rahne's mind is going into shock now and I don't do something soon, she'll die."  
  
"You do what you have to, me and Kurt will do our part." Iceman replied. His sickness and disgust had turned to rage now, and his mind was completely focused on protecting Rahne.  
  
"God's graces go with you, Jean." Kurt said.  
  
Jean concentrated, and plunged her mind into Rahne's. Jean was briefly overwhelmed by Rahne's pain, both emotional and physical, before she remembered her training and shut the pain and focused on her mission. She looked around as the landscape around her. At first, it was just mist. But as Jean pressed further into Rahne's mind, it changed, transforming from an ethereal mist into what looked a countryside neighborhood in Scotland.  
  
-Her mind must have retreated to familiar surroundings to cope with the pain, but where could she be? Where would she feel safest?- Jean recalled everything she knew about Rahne, and knew instantly where she would be hiding. She took the air, or what passed for in Rahne's mind, and scanned the block until she found what she was looking for. The church. It wasn't a fancy one; rather it looked rather simple and old. Jean opened the door and scanned the empty room. She saw Rahne curled up in a fetal position under a cross, crying and begging.  
  
"Make it stop, please lord... make it stop, I'll be a good girl, jus' make it stop..."  
  
Jean walked up to Rahne and knelt down beside her. She gently took Rahne's hand and said, "It's okay now, Rahne. The X-men are here now. You're safe."  
  
"Jean, is that you?"  
  
"Yes. Me and the other X-Men are here to save you. Rahne, this isn't real. I'm in your mind now, trying to help you. You need to come 'outside' with me. If you stay here too long, your mind is going to shut down." Jean explained, "You'll die."  
  
"I can't, it's tae painful. I...I don' want tae be hurt anymore...I cannae do it!" Rahne sobbed. Jean carefully, but forcefully, pulled Rahne to her feet.  
  
"You can do this. I'll be right here with you. Be strong, Rahne. I promise you, nothing will hurt you anymore."  
  
"I'm safe here..."  
  
"No you're not Rahne. You'll die if you stay here much longer, and I owe your mother too much just to let you die like this."  
  
Jean, half pulling Rahne, walked towards the door. When she opened it, a crowd of people appeared, shouting curses and slurs aimed at Rahne.  
  
"Ye are the spawn of the devil!" One man, dressed as a minister, yelled at her.  
  
"What makes you so special? Why did you escape while the rest of us suffered! Why!?" Another figured demanded of her. Jean recognized it as a mutate from Genosha.  
  
"You have a good time, sweet heart?" Another man, dressed as a guard, asked Rahne. Rahne pulled away from Jean, attempting to run back to the church, but Jean held strong. She put her hands over Rahne's eyes and walked thru the mob. The crowd parted as they walked past them, never touching the two women and slowly, the landscape began to dissolve until Rahne and Jean were alone and simply surrounded by mist.  
  
"Your ordeal is over now, Rahne. Rest." And with that, Jean sent a telepathic command to Rahne's mind, putting her into a deep sleep and shutting off all her pain receptors. Jean then returned to her own body.  
  
"Did it work? Is she out of danger now? Is she alright?" Iceman asked, not caring how stupid the questions were.  
  
"She's out of immediate danger now, but we have to get her back to the mansion quickly. She needs serious medical attention and she needs it now."  
  
"Vas? We can't move her in that condition, we may kill her!"  
  
"We sure as hell can't leave her here! Look, I can move her with my telekinetic powers without doing any damage to her body. Kurt, go warm up the Black Bird, we don't have a second to lose." Jean said. With a –bamf-, Kurt was gone.  
  
"I'll cover you while you get Rahne back to that hole in the building we made."  
  
"No need, Bobby." Jean waved her hand, and the far wall just exploded outwards. She then gently picked up the bed Rahne was strapped too and flew out towards the Black Bird. She quickly loaded Rahne into the Black Bird with all deliberate care. Once Rahne was secured, she telepathically reached out to Wolverine.  
  
* Logan, we have to get Rahne back to the mansion now! She may not last much longer if we don't. Will you and the others be all right? *  
  
*Does it matter? Get the kid the hell out of here!* Logan responded. He wasn't worried about the odds in the slightest. He, along with Chamber, Angel and X-Stacy, had already defeated well over a hundred guards, but to the X-Men, it was barely a morning work out.  
  
"Kurt, this needs to be the fastest and gentlest flight you've ever flown." Jean stated matter of factly.  
  
Kurt didn't respond. He just activated the vertical take off sequence and smoothly activated the thrusters. He slowly increased the speed until they were flying well past mach five. Once the course was programmed in, he reached for the radio.  
  
"This is Nightcrawler calling the mansion, come in!"  
  
"Ms, McCoy's bouncing bundle of joy here. What do you need, my brother in blue?"  
  
"We have a medical emergency here. Rahne's in serious trouble. Prep the operating room and have Reyes meet us in the hangar."  
  
*** 


	2. The reason why

As Wolverine cut down yet another guard, he could help but think how familiar this entire situation was. He could smell the drugs and see the medical equipment. He didn't have to see Rahne to know what was going on here. The entire set up reminded him of the U-Men, Weapon X, and the P.O.W camps in Japan during World War Two. Another monster butchering innocent men and women to suit their agenda.  
  
-Whoever's behind this, isn't going to just catch a beating and getting hauled off to jail so they can get out and do it again. - He vowed. One guard tried to sneak up on him from behind. In one fluid movement Wolverine spun around, disarmed the man with one hand and holding his claws two inches from the man's eyes.  
  
" You look like a smart man, so I think you can answer a question I have. Where's the man in charge of this slaughterhouse? And before you think of lying to me, remember that my senses will tell me if yer jerkin' me around. Play straight with me boy, or I play tic tack toe on with your face."  
  
" There's no need to threaten that young man, Mr. Logan. I'm on the top floor, room 201. You can take the elevator up to me, if you like." A voice said over the speaker system. Logan was surprised for a moment that it could be that easy, but he knew a trap when he saw one.  
  
" Thanks, I'll take the stairs." Logan replied. He knocked the guard out and took to the stairs. He reached the top floor, after a little detour to find Iceman and send him to help the others, and smashed thru door, his body ready for anything. Surprisingly, there wasn't a guard to be found. He walked down the hall, sniffing the air for any scent of danger. As he reached the door to room 201, he concentrated and 'reached out' with his senses. He could hear breathing, slightly shallow, indicating that it was an older man. His breathing was also calm and steady. Wolverine could also smell gunpowder and machine oil, but he'd faced that dozens of times in the past.  
  
" Please, come in. The door's unlocked." The man said. Wolverine casually opened the door. He knew that if the guy wanted to try to blow him away, he would have done it already. The office was filled with expensive furniture, hand-sown rugs and fine china set in a nearby cabinet. Wolverine took one look at the man sitting behind the desk, and recognized him from Angel's description. Oddly enough, it looked like the man hadn't slept in weeks, if not months.  
  
"John Calvin, right? I'd say it's been nice knowing ya', but it hasn't been." Wolverine popped his claws and stepped forward, but as soon as he did, six Gatling guns shot out of the wall, aimed directly at Logan. Wolverine stood perfectly still, waiting Calvin to make his move.  
  
" Those guns are programmed to fire automatically if you come within ten feet of me. They are computer guided and loaded with mercury tipped bullets and fire a thousand rounds per minute, which would kill even you, assuming of course; they don't strip all the flesh from your bones first."  
  
" You know what your momma always said about assumin'. Sounds like a challenge to me." Wolverine smirked. Even as he said that, he was running thru all his opinions in his head. He ran thru the vector points, the ricochet patterns and a dozen other factors, planning on how he would get at Calvin.  
  
" Not at all. I simply want a few minutes to explain myself and I will hand myself over to your mercies."  
  
" I don't have any for a man like you, and I'm not really in the mood for a heart to heart right now." Wolverine said grimly.  
  
" I know that, but you know the value of patience, do you not? All you have to do is humor me for a few moments, and then you can kill me."  
  
" Okay, then, spill. Why did you do all this? The experiments, the torture. I thought you were a humanitarian, not some mutant butcher."  
  
" I_AM_NOT_A_BIGOT! Do you think I enjoyed what I did to those men and women? I fell asleep every night to their screams of pain and torment! Not because I enjoyed their pain, but rather to remind myself of the cost of what I have done! I'm not a monster…" He shouted. He took a moment to calm down, to collect himself before he continued, " I'm not a monster. I'm just a tired old man. I worked as a doctor around the world, trying to save lives and I worked in the boardroom to save them as well. But after a while, it's hard. Have you ever looked into the eyes of a man who is dying, how he pleads with you to do something, anything, to save his life when you can do nothing?"  
  
"I've seen it more times than I can count, but that doesn't justify what you've done to those poor souls. They didn't deserve to die like that."  
  
" It's not the same when you're a doctor. People put faith in you to save them, to ease their suffering. To make them better. I've seen young men and women, children even, die simply because they couldn't get access to antibiotics that were strong enough fast enough. Some treatments simply weren't effective enough. After twenty years, I just couldn't… stand it anymore. We needed better, more effective drugs that were cheaper to produce. And we needed them now, not later."  
  
" So this is your solution? Cut up some super humans and see what you can get from them?"  
  
"Unfortunately, yes. I had read that there were super humans and mutants who had, by one way or another acquired a healing factor. We decided that attempting to kidnap you or the mercenary known as Deadpool was too dangerous. And the animal called Sabretooth, well… We kidnapped Jack Flag, Marrow, Feral and Wildchild due to the fact that not only did they have a healing factor, but additional powers. That way, we could compare their D.N.A and figure out how their healing factors worked and possibly duplicate it. The young girl, Wolfsbane, was taken so we could examine both her healing factor, however slight, and her transformational powers. With the information we got from her body alone, we're able to push medical science decades into the future today. Using the information we gathered from Jack Flag, we've managed to cultivate cells that could repair nerve damage. From Marrow, we have actually been able to create a substitute for bone marrow that could stave off death in leukemia sufferers until they could get a transplant. We, we did what we had too… to help the world." Calvin said. It sounded like he had said those lines a million times before. It certainly didn't sound like he believed it though.  
  
" The ends justify the means huh? That still doesn't make what you did to them right. I stopped by the floor where you and your friends were playing god. I didn't smell a drop of any painkillers or sedative. You tortured those men and women before you killed them, and may have killed that girl."  
  
" Painkillers might have… influenced the data negatively. And I wasn't exactly dealing with normal… moral doctors. With the combined data we collected from them, we were on our way to discovering how to transplant a healing factor, albeit temporarily, into a normal human being. We didn't have much success at first, and the process killed all those who underwent it, but we had to keep trying." He replied weakly.  
  
" So you sacrificed the few for the good of the many. I don't have to tell you how hollow that sounds."  
  
" You have to make hard choices as a doctor. Mistakes happen, but they serve the greater good."  
  
" Yeah, me and the others stumbled across your mass grave of mistakes. So what are you going to do with all that data you collected? Sell it to the highest bidder?"  
  
" Not at all. I have never wanted for money in my life. When I discovered you were attacking the complex, I sent the data to all of the respectable health organizations over the world. See that C.D on the table in front of you? It also contains all the information that we gathered."  
  
" And why the hell would I want that? It's drenched in the blood of innocent human beings." Wolverine asked, " Fruit of the poison tree."  
  
" Because it also contains the data on what we did to Ms. Sinclair. If you want her to make any kind of recovery and have any kind of normal life afterwards, you'll take it. It's your choice." Wolverine didn't say anything. He knew when to swallow his pride and deal with the hand he had been dealt. He picked up the C.D and placed it in his jacket, swearing to himself that it would only be used to help Rahne. As he did that, Calvin pressed a button on his desk and the guns disappeared back into the wall.  
  
" You know that with the guns gone, I'm going to kill you." Wolverine said without a trace of emotion.  
  
" I fully understand that. I also hope that you make it a painful death. I know I deserve no less for my sins." He replied. Wolverine walked up to him slowly, taking his time.  
  
" That girl you butchered and god knows what else, she wouldn't want you dead. She would want you thrown in jail, and would pray to god to redeem your soul every day of her life." Wolverine was now almost face-to-face with Calvin, but the man never made a move to get away. Fear was written all over his face, of course. Wolverine popped one his middle claw on his right hand and looked him straight in the eye,  
  
" But for some sins, there is no absolution." With that, Wolverine stabbed Calvin in the heart.  
  
" If you're going to ask for forgiveness now, it'd be a good time. Not that I much care."  
  
" I'm won't ask… for forgiveness… because I know I don't deserve it. But that… doesn't mean I'm not sorry… for what I've done. But at least… my damnation will make this world a… better place." He said meekly. As Calvin died, Logan picked up the phone on Calvin's desk. This entire situation needed to be dealt with in a professional manner. Wolverine knew that he had to track down the organizations that Calvin had sent the data to and someone had to make sure that information was erased and not misused. And Wolverine knew of only one person in the world who could do that. Dialing a top secret number, Wolverine called an old friend,  
  
" Hey, Nick, I got a problem here."  
  
***  
  
When Cecilia Reyes saw what had been done to Rahne, she felt like she would throw up for a moment. But only for a moment.  
  
" We need to get her X-rays A.S.A.P! I also need two pints of blood and five milligrams of Haldol!" She yelled as she wheeled Rahne down the hall to the X-Men's medi-lab, followed by Beast and Jean.  
  
" Don't bother with pain killers, Cecilia, I already turned off the pain receptors in her mind, she won't feel a thing." Jean explained.  
  
" I still want that haldol, Grey, now help me and Hank put her on the examination table." They moved to pick her up, but noticed that she was still strapped to the bed by her wrists and ankles. With an angered look on her face, Jean motioned and pulled the straps clean off with her powers, without harming Rahne. They then gently picked her up and placed her on the examination table.  
  
" Unless you have some medical experience, Jean, you need to get the hell out of here and let me and Hank do our job." Cecilia said as she started the scans on Rahne. Cecilia had recently decided to familiarize herself with the X-Men's Shi'ar technology and was now very glad she had done so. She could now determine what was wrong with her patient in seconds. Jean turned to Hank and pressed her hand against his head and scanned his mind, copying and 'downloading' all his considerable medical knowledge before he could even react.  
  
" I do now. I've seen her wounds, and I don't need to be a doctor to know that you'll need all the help you can get."  
  
Cecilia didn't respond. She knew Jean well enough to know that if she said she could do something, she could. As she read the results from the scans, she found herself speechless.  
  
" What's wrong?" Hank asked.  
  
" Almost everything." She answered.  
  
***  
  
" I want every man here booked and processed. I want the tech boys to go over every communication that came in and out of this place, even if it was just a 1-800 call. I want our forensics team in here and attempting to identify the victims. I also want to know how this happened, why it happened and who made it happen. I want to know why the hell we didn't catch this before it got this far. And I want to it done yesterday, understood?" Nick Fury asked the men standing in front of him. His men, among the best trained in the world, simply saluted and went about their work.  
  
After Logan had called him and informed him of the situation and the possible consequences, Nick Fury personally headed a S.H.I.E.L.D scrub team to the island. Seeing as how the X-Men had been there first, securing the island was a cakewalk. Within minutes they had the entire complex under control and they went about gathering their evidence. The X-Men, given their somewhat gray legal status, decided to 'observe' from the forest, out of sight.  
  
" Sir, the scanners have detected five live mutants on the island. What are your orders?"  
  
" The scanners are busted. Ignore them." Fury ordered.  
  
" But sir…"  
  
" Are you questioning my orders, son?" Fury asked harshly.  
  
" No sir… I just…"  
  
" Good, I don't like it when people question my orders. Makes me mad. You got your job to do, so do it."  
  
With that, Fury stalked off towards the woods and pulled out two of the Cuban cigars that he always kept with him.  
  
"Hey Logan, care to join me?"  
  
" You're one of the few men in the world who can always find me, you know that Nick?" Logan said as he came out from behind a tree.  
  
" Only so many places you can hide so that you could hear everything we said, even with your hearing. Any word on how Wolfsbane is doing? Met her once or twice when she was working with that X-Factor outfit. Sends chills down my spine thinkin' what they might have done to that nice girl here. Haven't seen anything quite like this since the big one."  
  
Wolverine didn't even ask how he knew the X-Men had rescued Wolfsbane. Nick Fury was the world's greatest spy, after all.  
  
" Nothin'. We had to get her back home fast, so we're stranded here for the moment. What are you going to do with what you found in there anyways? What are your boys doing about findin' that data that Calvin said he sent out?"  
  
" I got the tech boys on the emails, tracking it down. If they broke international laws giving this information, which they sure as hell did, then no one's going to touch that data, even if it's the cure for cancer. I'm just sorry about what those poor souls who didn't survive this. What they went thru…for nothin'."  
  
" Huh? What're you talkin' about Fury?"  
  
" International law expressly forbids the use of medical knowledge gained thru 'unlawful' means. So whatever knowledge they got out of those experiments, we can't touch."  
  
" So, like you said, all those people died for nothing, huh?"  
  
Fury took a long drag of his cigar and sighed.  
  
" Yep, damn shame if you ask me. You said you need a ride home?"  
  
" Yeah. I have to admit not knowing what happened to the kid is driving me crazy. Thanks alot, Nick."  
  
Against his better judgment, Logan decided against telling Fury about the C.D that Calvin had given him.  
  
On the far side of the island, the other X-Men were cooling their heels and listening to Angel trying to deny the truth of what Logan had learned.  
  
" I knew the man personally, Bobby, and I have a hard time believing that he would be apart of something like this. I mean, he spent all his vacation time volunteering with Doctor's Without Borders!"  
  
" I just know what I saw and what Logan told me. I've never see anything so sickening in my life, what I saw in there! Besides, shouldn't you be more upset about Marrow? She was an X-Man, not some sadist like this guy!" Iceman asked.  
  
" He wasn't a sadist. His mission in life was to ease pain, not cause it!"  
  
*Sound's like this bloke just snapped to me*. Chamber suggested.  
  
" You guys would be surprised about the level of stress that doctors go thru. When I was working at the X-ranch, I knew one young doctor who came by nearly every day for a week after he lost a patient. Poor man just couldn't deal with the fact that there was nothing he could do to save him." X-Stacy added.  
  
*What happened to him?*  
  
"One day, his wife came home and found that he hanged himself. The pain just got to be to much for him."  
  
" I just can't believe that a man who dedicated his life to the betterment of others would do something like this." Angel said weakly. For the longest time, Angel had been honored to counted among Calvin's friends and he thought of the man as a kindly uncle. That he would do these horrible things and was now dead, was very hard to come to terms with.  
  
" Saddle up people, Fury's loaning up a jet to get back to the mansion. We're done here." Wolverine said as he rejoined the group.  
  
" What about Sarah? What are they going to do with her body? She deserves her last respects!"  
  
" They need to do autopsies on the bodies before they release them to their next of kin. Nick's got our number. Don't you worry none, Bobby. That girl was an X-man, and she'll get the burial she deserves. But right now, I'm more concerned about Rahne."  
  
" Think she'll live?" Warren asked.  
  
" That's what I'm afraid of." Logan replied. 


	3. Awakenings

Chapter 3 Awakenings  
  
It had been nearly twelve hours since Rahne was taken into the X-Men's O.R room, but there had still been no word on her condition. To Nightcrawler, Danielle Moonstar (whom Kurt called seconds after Rahne went into surgery) Professor X and Wolverine, who had been in the waiting room for most of that time, it was maddening.  
  
"What is going on in there, professor? How is Rahne?" Nightcrawler asked for what had to be the tenth time in as many minutes.  
  
"I'm afraid I don't know, Kurt. I'm concerned that if I use my telepathy, I might interrupt a delicate procedure. We'll just have to wait."  
  
"Wait! My best friend could be dying in there, and all you recommend is wait? Why the hell didn't you tell me she was in danger! I should have come with you, damn it!" Moonstar yelled accusingly.  
  
"I didn't want to worry you, nor did I know at the time that Rahne was in danger. We were fortunate enough to find Rahne before these people killed her along with the others they had kidnapped." Professor X explained, "I felt that time was of the essence."  
  
"And why didn't you keep better track of her in the first place? She was one of your first students in the New Mutants and the daughter of your closest friend, the least you could have fucking done was make sure she was where she was supposed to be!" Dani spat  
  
Xavier didn't respond. He just looked away, ashamed, completely agreeing with what Moonstar had said. John, Doug, Warlock, Sam, Illyana, Peter, David, and now Sarah, all former students. Dead now because he wasn't good enough, strong enough or just wasn't there for them. And now Rahne, his most innocence student...  
  
"The professor can't be everywhere at once, Moonstar. Rahne's got a right to live her life as she sees fit, and that don't mean checking in with the Prof' about everything she does." Logan said, "He saved her damn life, and don't you dare blame him for those bastard's actions."  
  
Dani took a deep breath and sighed. Logan was right, and she knew it. But that did little to stop the fear and rage gnawing at her very soul right now.  
  
"I know, I know. I'm sorry Professor, I'm just a little high strung right now. First X-Force dies, and now this..."  
  
"It's alright Dani, I understand. We all care for Rahne. This is hard on us all."  
  
As the Professor said that, Cecilia emerged from the O.R. She looked very tired, more emotionally than physically. She already knew the questions that they had, so she didn't waste a moment.  
  
"We've finished up now. Rahne's still in critical condition, but I expect her to pull thru. You can see her now, if you like." She said  
  
Cecilia led them to Rahne's recovery room. If they hadn't known that Rahne had just come out of surgery, they would have never recognized her. Both her arms were in casts, as was her right leg, which was suspended in the air by a pulley system. Her fiery red hair was all shaved away and her head was heavily bandaged and her eyes were swollen shut. What parts of her body they could see was covered in stitches, staples and bruises.  
  
"Vhat did those butchers do to her?" Nightcrawler asked, unable to believe his eyes and barely able to hold his lunch down.  
  
"A better question would be what didn't they do to her. I found that the bones in both her arms had been broken and had healed improperly. Not only that, but they were infected as well. I had to rebreak them to set them, only after I cleaned out all the all infection and drained all the fluid that had built up." Cecelia shook her head in disgust, "I've never had to do so many rebreaks on one patient before. I've never had to use so many pins and screws before, either. I also found evidence of blunt force trauma to her spine, kidney and ribs. Muscle and cartilage had been surgically cut as well as one of her lungs was removed...among other things. We were able to repair a lot of the damage and reattach the cartilage, but the ligaments in her leg were damaged almost beyond repair. I doubt she'll ever be able to walk unassisted again." She explained.  
  
"Among other things? What do you mean by that?" Moonstar asked. Dani wanted with all her heart to reach out and touch her bed-ridden friend, as though to comfort her in someway, but restrained herself, if only barely. She didn't want to make things worse...  
  
"I'd rather not say right now. Doctor patient privilege, you understand. Hank and Jean were able to reattach most of the damaged nerves and limit the damage already done to them but overall, Rahne's very lucky to be alive right now. By all rights, she should have died on that island."  
  
"Do...do you have any idea when she'll wake up?" Kurt asked  
  
"Hard to say. I expect it to be a week, at the very least. She's got a long recovery ahead of her."  
  
"I'll stay with her then, until she wakes up. If it's not a problem." Moonstar said. It was more of an order than a request.  
  
"That would be fine, Dani. I would suggest that the rest of us retire for the day. This day has been hard on us all." The professor stated, though he knew that almost no one would get a good nights sleep now. When the others had left the room, Dani pulled up a chair and sat down next to Rahne's bed.  
  
"Hey, Rahne, it's me, Dani. I know it's been a while since we've had a good long talk, and... I'm sorry about that now." A single tear ran down Dani's cheek, "I know we've grown apart over the years and I...I really regret that now. You were always, always there for me whenever I needed you, and I haven't really repaid you for that. When you wake up, I hope to change all that. I brought a book to read to you that I hope you'll like. So... This is the record of the ancestry of Jesus Christ who was the descendant of both David and Abraham..."  
  
***  
  
It was nearly four in the morning, yet Hank McCoy still hadn't gone to bed. He was pouring over the data on the disk that Logan had given him, examining it in close detail once they had finished operating on Rahne. In truth, he felt like he was watching pornography, but without any of the sexual gratification. He knew from Logan how the data he was looking at was acquired. How living men and women were kidnapped and tortured at the expense of the 'greater good' and it disgusted him to the core of his being.  
  
But after helping Cecelia operate on Rahne, he knew that Rahne needed every little bit of aid that she could get. Her body had atrophied from being strapped to a bed for well over a month, she was malnourished and strands of muscle had been surgically damaged. And that wasn't the worst of it. They had found evidence of burns and frostbite, as well as bone marrow removed. Important internal organs were removed as well. They would have to wait until Rahne awoke before they would find out exactly what happened to her, but they already had a good idea what happened and they knew full well that it wasn't pleasant.  
  
-What kind of monsters were these people to do what they did to such a sweet and innocent child? - He asked himself. His thoughts drifted back to the time he had spent on Muir Island, working on a cure for the Legacy Virus. Most of the time, it was just himself, Moira and Rahne on that lonely atoll. She was so full of life and energy, watching her mother like a hawk, making sure that the both of them never went too long without eating or sleeping. Whenever they hit a wall, Rahne buoyed their spirits by telling them to keep their faith up, that where there was life, there was hope and many a pep talks. Despite the tremendous chore they had ahead of them, and the harsh reality they faced, her optimism was incredibly infectious. Her innocence, combined with pep talks rivaling those of Captain America's, helped get Hank thru the long days more than once. He felt that if there was anything he could do to help Rahne, it was his duty to do so. She had already lost so much. Too much. And so, he looked over the data again, hoping that it could be of use.  
  
***  
  
"Dacosta Industries, Roberto Dacosta speaking." A voice said dryly. Roberto Dacosta, also known as the mutant hero Sunspot and heir to an incredible family fortune, had a hard time hiding the fact that running a multi national corporation was dull and tedious work. The paper work never seemed to end...  
  
"Hey, Bobby this is Dani."  
  
"Dani! How have you been?" Bobby asked, his spirits instantly risen by hearing the voice of his old friend and teammate.  
  
"Poor, something...happened." Dani said as she held the phone to her ear and looked over Rahne's comatose form, "something's happened to Rahne."  
  
"What happened to her?" Bobby asked worriedly, noticing Dani's depressed tone.  
  
As Dani explained what happened to Rahne, Bobby began to feel a knot form in his stomach. While he wasn't as close with Rahne as Dani was, she was still a good friend and he loved her dearly. What's more, he always thought of Rahne as the sweetest, most innocent person he had ever known, someone who never should have been made to suffer in such painful ways.  
  
"You mean, she was part of Dr. Calvin's experiments? My god..." Bobby gasped as he sunk back in his chair.  
  
"Yeah, she...wait a minute, how did you know that she was kidnapped by Dr. Calvin?"  
  
"Because it's been all over the news, Dani, what he did! C.N.N, Fox, the Washington Post, everything!" He explained  
  
"Oh, what did they say about what he did?" Dani asked curiously  
  
"Just that Dr. Calvin was performing obscene medical experiments before he took his own life. They also said that all the data that was gathered was purged by the doctors Calvin hired to hide their guilt. It didn't help any, though. The authorities have more than enough proof with which to convict them. Shame, really."  
  
"What's that?" Dani demanded  
  
"That all those people had to die for nothing."  
  
"Would you rather justify what they did to Rahne?" Dani growled.  
  
"No, I wouldn't, you're right." Bobby said. He didn't agree with Dani, but now wasn't the time to have a debate, "So, no offense, why are you calling?"  
  
"I just needed to hear an old friends voice. Of all our old class members in the New Mutants, you were really the only one I could find. Shan is impossible to track down, Amara and Warlock are god knows where too and Sam...is gone." Dani sighed. She still had a hard time accepting the fact that Sam Guthrie, her closet friend next to Rahne, had been killed in action.  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Sam isn't dead, Dani." Bobby deadpanned  
  
"Bobby, Sam is dead. He was killed in an explosion along with what remained of X-Force. No one could have survived that explosion."  
  
"Well, you know that new X-Force?" He inquired  
  
"You mean those Judus'?" Dani hissed. Several weeks after the X-Force she knew and had been a part of once were killed, a new and very public team calling itself X-Force had debuted. But they weren't heroes like the old X- Force or anyone else who wore the X. They were media lap dogs, doing anything and everything to gain attention, and that including being incredibly brutal in battle, "What about them?"  
  
"Well, they recently held a press conference, where Sam, along with the rest of X-Force, attacked them."  
  
"What! What happened?"  
  
"Well, Sam and the others beat the hell out them until one of the members, U-Go-Girl, teleported them away." Bobby said with no small amount of pride  
  
"Are you sure it was Sam? I wouldn't put in past those bastards to hire actors."  
  
"The Cannonball I saw on T.V made several references to a danger room, some guy named Cable and being a former member of the X-Men. I'm sure, Dani." Bobby stated  
  
"Spirits, why didn't anyone tell me? He's was one of my closest friends, someone here should have told me! " Dani fumed. Sam was officially on her shit list now, for pulling something like this. Damn did she want his head now...  
  
"They probably didn't want to upset you what with Rahne and everything. But how could you... miss it."  
  
"What?"  
  
"You haven't been outside Rahne's room at all, have you?"  
  
"How did you know that?"  
  
"Because you seem to have no idea about what's going on in the outside world, Dani. What have you been doing all this time?" Bobby asked incredulously  
  
"Reading, singing, just being here in case, I mean when, Rahne wakes up." Dani explained  
  
"I didn't know you could sing." Bobby said teasingly.  
  
"I'm a fast learner."  
  
"I believe it. Look, is there anything I can do for Rahne?" Bobby offered, "I can hire the best doctors for her or..."  
  
"That's alright, Bobby. We already have one of the best doctor's in the world here, and with all the alien technology that the X-Men have picked up over the years, we should be fine."  
  
"Are you certain there is nothing I can do for Rahne?"  
  
"Well,"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Hank told me that, thanks to all the damage done to the ligaments in her legs, she'll never be able to walk without crutches. If it's not too much trouble, could you buy a pair for her and have them shipped here? I'd like to be prepared for when she wakes up, but I can't go out and get them myself and the others are content to wait until she wakes up. I can spend you the measurements, anything you need." Dani said  
  
"Dear god." Bobby muttered under his breath. He knew Rahne well enough to know that she would never adjust emotionally to having to use crutches. "Of course, Dani. I swear to you as a Dacosta, I will get Rahne the finest crutches money can buy, and they will be there in two days or less." Bobby didn't care how very stupid his promise sounded, so long as he was able to help both Dani and Rahne.  
  
"Thanks, Bobby. I'm sure Rahne will appreciate it."  
  
As Bobby hung the phone, he cursed the fact that was prohibited from entering the U.S and that he wasn't closer to Rahne. He knew that she would need all the friends she could get to help her recover, and he wished that he could be one of them. But since he wasn't, he decided to do everything he could still do, however small. He pressed the button to call his secretary,  
  
"Ellen? Cancel all my appointments for today, and find out who I need to talk to about buying a pair of crutches."  
  
"Sir? Are... you alright?"  
  
"They're for a friend," Bobby sighed, "Also, have my private jet prepped, just in case."  
  
"Just in case?"  
  
"Just in case I need to fly them to my friend." Bobby explained angrily.  
  
"Yes, sir. Is that all for today?"  
  
-No, I have to go and be sick now. Rahne...- Roberto thought to himself, "Yes, that will be all."  
  
***  
  
ow are Of all the many things Wolverine wanted to do today, contacting the next of kin of the recently deceased naturally was not on the list. No matter how many times he'd done, he despised it. But Bobby was right, it had to be done and he was the only one who could help do it.  
  
-Sometimes it's a pain in the ass being the best there is at what I do- Logan thought to himself as he walked down the halls to the elevator to reach the medi-lab. As he entered, he heard Dani reading softly.  
  
"...Then Jesus said, "Believe me when I tell you..."  
  
"...that anyone who does not enter the sheepfold through the door, but climbs in by some other way, is a thief and a rogue." Logan finished. Moonstar looked at him, astonished.  
  
"You? The bible?"  
  
"I'm pretty well read." Logan shrugged, "How's the kid doin'?"  
  
"No change since she came out of surgery, but Cecelia tells me that she's steadily improving. What are you doing here?"  
  
"I decided to stop by on the way to the Alley. Me and Bobby are going to try to find Callisto to tell her what happened to Marrow." Logan explained  
  
"It's been ages since anyone saw her last. What makes you think she's there now?"  
  
"It's her home, and in many ways, she doesn't have anywhere else to go. How are you holding up? You look like hell, Moonstar. You been getting enough sleep?"  
  
Dani sighed dismissively,"Asked like it matters."  
  
"It matters a lot. Don't help Rahne none if you kill yourself before she even wakes up."  
  
"That won't happen. I've just been reading and singing to her while she's in her coma. Cecelia told me that external stimulation is good for her, so here I am. Rahne's gone the distance to help me every time I needed her, Logan, and I intend to do the same."  
  
"I understand the feeling, Moonstar, but you won't do anyone any good if you burn yourself out." Logan said as he left the medi-lab. When he got to the huge metal doors that sealed the rest of the mansion off from the morlock tunnels, he was quite surprised to see Bobby Drake already there waiting.  
  
"Thought you'd sleep in a little before we headed out. You feeling okay?"  
  
"Honestly, I just want to get this over with, man. It's not every day I have to tell someone a loved one died." Bobby replied  
  
"I know the feeling. I had to call Heather and Mac yesterday to tell them what happened to Kyle. She was pretty upset about how he died."  
  
Bobby formed his trademark ice-sleds for himself and Wolverine, and they headed down towards the alley. The trip was long and quite, for the most part, the two mutants not particularly compatible with one another. When they reached the main part of the alley, Logan signaled for Bobby to stop.  
  
"Do you smell her?"  
  
"Yeah, and something else."  
  
"What?"  
  
-Clik- Clik-Clik-Clik-Clik-Clik-Clik-Clik-Clik-Clik-Clik-Clik-Clik-Clik- Clik-Clik-Clik-  
  
"Gun powder." Wolverine deadpanned  
  
"Thank you, Charleston Hesston." Bobby said as he saw nearly two dozen weapons with laser scopes trained on him from the shadows. "At least their better prepared to defend themselves now."  
  
"Callisto! We're just here to talk!" Wolverine shouted, loud enough for the entire alley to hear.  
  
"What do you want, up-worlder? Come to look down your nose at us ugly mutants?" Callisto sneered as she stepped forward from the shadows.  
  
"I never did that before, and I don't see any reason to start now." Logan growled. Callisto was NOT his favorite person in the world...  
  
"So what do you want, Wolverine? Somehow, I doubt this is a social visit."  
  
"It's about Sarah, Callisto. She was murdered." Bobby said.  
  
"What? Who killed her!?" Callisto demanded  
  
"She was kidnapped, along with others who possessed a healing factor, by scientists who wanted to exploit their powers. They killed her while they were experimenting on her. I'm so sorry." Bobby explained.  
  
"Sorry? About what, boy? Life is pain and death is a release. She died like all the morlocks before her did, for nothing." Callisto spat.  
  
"You can at least pretend you gave a damn about her!" Logan growled.  
  
"You think that just because I don't break down crying that I don't care? The Marauders took all my tears long ago, when they butchered most of our number. Life is hard for a morlock, and then you die. Marrow knew that. She wouldn't cry for me, and I won't for her."  
  
"You heartless..." Wolverine began to growl and tense his body  
  
"We're having a funeral for Sarah in a few days," Bobby said, cutting Logan off, "You're welcomed to come and attend, of course."  
  
"That won't be necessary. I will honor her in my own way." Callisto said as she spun on her heels and began to leave  
  
"If that's what you want."  
  
"See to it that you honor her better than those the Marauders killed." Logan muttered as he left.  
  
"What does it matter how I honor her? Her death was meaningless, after all." Callisto stated without looking over her shoulder. With that, the leader of the Morlocks melted into the shadows, along with her followers  
  
Neither Wolverine or Iceman, for their part, replied or stopped them. They just headed back towards the mansion, disgusted by what they had heard. The fact that it was true certainly didn't help any.  
  
***  
  
It had been over ten days since the X-Men had rescued Rahne from her captors, and she still hadn't awakened. Cecelia wasn't much concerned about it though. With the scanners the X-Men had, she could tell that Rahne's body was quickly healing and most importantly, correctly. Cecelia decided to use the time Rahne was in a coma to use the technology the X-Men had acquired over the years to remove the scars from Rahne's body. Cecelia had noted well over forty of them of all shapes and sizes before she forced herself to stop counting them. As she walked into Rahne's room, which was filled with flowers, balloons and all kinds of get well cards, she saw Dani slumped over in a chair next to Rahne, asleep with a bible on her lap.  
  
-It's the same scene every morning-She thought to herself, -It would be kind of sweet if it wasn't so harmful to her health-.  
  
Cecelia nudged Dani on the shoulder to wake her.  
  
"Rise and shine, Dani."  
  
"I did it again, didn't I?" She asked groggily.  
  
"Yeah. I know you want to help your friend, but you might hurt yourself if you keep this up."  
  
Moonstar stood up and stretched, her joints making very loud pops and snaps. "I'll worry about myself when Rahne's alright. How were the funerals?"  
  
"Storm gave a very emotional eulogy at Sarah's, I think everyone could tell she was pretty torn up by her death. Bobby seemed pretty upset as well."  
  
"I know. Storm was here earlier, visiting Rahne with the rest of the diary hunters. I just wish they didn't have to leave so soon. How was Feral's funeral? I wanted to go, but it just didn't feel right. I did betray her trust and we weren't exactly close before that, after all. I know she was a killer, but she had such a hard life growing up..."  
  
"As I understand it, only her sister Thorrn, her boyfriend and Cable attended." Cecelia said  
  
"I'm sorry to hear that. How is Rahne doing? How is her recovery coming?"  
  
"As I explained to you and Jean, time and again I might add, her bones and tendons have healed at a remarkable rate, thanks mostly to her powers I suspect. Some of her healing factor must have 'bled' into her human form or something. I was actually surprised that I was able to take off her leg casts yesterday. I think we'll be able to take the casts off her arms soon, though I may leave them on longer just in case."  
  
"Any idea when she'll wake up?"  
  
"Soon. I hope. It's hard to say really, I've never treated a mutant werewolf before." Cecelia replied.  
  
"Yeah, Rahne's always been rather unique. Look, I'm going to get a bite to eat, I'm famished. If anything changes, call me okay? I should be back in a few minutes. "  
  
Cecelia just nodded in response. As Moonstar left, Cecelia wheeled Rahne's bed into the main medical lab and placed her under what looked very much like a multi colored sun lamp. The X-Men called it a dermal regenerator, which prevented them from carrying permanent reminders of their mistakes in the danger room with them for the rest of their lives. According to the X- Men, it could heal scars, and some nerve damage, without leaving a mark in one session. But Cecelia and Hank were afraid of upsetting Rahne's body chemistry after the massive operation she had performed to repair her body, and working together with Hank, they made a schedule that would work best for Rahne in her current condition.  
  
"I know this won't make the memory of what happened to you go away, Rahne, but at least you won't have to think about it every time you look at yourself in the mirror." Cecelia said as she examined the controls to the dermal regenerator. She knew that she would have to plan a time when they could remove the scars from Rahne's back, due to the fact that the regenerator could only heal the scars that it was directly exposed to. She was afraid that putting Rahne on her stomach might hurt her bruised ribs or kidneys, so Cecelia decided it was best not to chance it.  
  
Cecelia dawned her medical scrubs, out of habit, and activated the machine. It hummed to life and bathed Rahne in a green light. Rahne's scars, which by now were little more than slight lines on her skin, simply faded away to nothing, leaving no evidence that they had ever been. As she turned off the ray, she heard a slight moan coming from Rahne.  
  
-She's waking up! Thank god!- Cecelia rushed to Rahne's side, "Miss Sinclair, can you hear me?"  
  
Rahne didn't answer. She couldn't. After being in a coma for so long, her eyes had trouble adjusting to the light and wouldn't focus and she couldn't concentrate on what Cecelia was saying. But despite all that, Rahne could understand two things perfectly.  
  
One, a woman in a medical uniform was standing over her.  
  
Two, that she was no longer restrained in any way.  
  
"GET AWAY FROM ME!" Rahne instantly shifted into her change form and she backhanded Cecelia with all her strength, knocking her clear across the room and into a cabinet of medical supplies, which collapsed onto her. Cecelia's force field activated seconds before she was hit, so she was fine physically, but pinned under the supplies. She observed Rahne jump out of her bed and dash out of the room, but was powerless to stop it. Curiously, Rahne had changed back into her human form by then.  
  
Cecelia, this is the professor! I just sensed a flash of pain and fear, what's going on down there?  
  
Rahne just woke up and she still thinks she's still being held captive! You need to seal this section off, keep the other students out of here, and get her friends down here fast! I'm worried that she may aggravate her injuries in her condition! Cecelia responded as she struggled to get out from under the shelf.  
  
*Understood*  
  
Within moments, Wolverine, Nightcrawler, Moonstar and Jean Grey were in the medical wing. They helped Cecelia out from under the supplies and planned their search.  
  
"Dani, you're the one with the mental link with her, what's going thru her head?" Logan asked.  
  
"She's not in her wolf form now. I felt her change, and could feel her fear and panic. I don't think she managed to transform for more than a few seconds. She wasn't thinking rationally at all, just running on fear!" Dani said worriedly  
  
"Jean? You got anything?"  
  
"Nothing. She's radiating fear, but it's so strong I can't pinpoint the position. If you'll give me a moment, though... "  
  
Logan was silent for a moment, as though his mind was somewhere else. "Don't bother. She's at the far end of the wing, at one of the exit doors. I can hear her poundin' on them."  
  
"What's the plan? How do we approach her? She's scared out of her mind right now, and we don't want to make things any worse than they already are."  
  
"Jean and Moonstar are goin' in first. We'll hang back out of sight, elf."  
  
"Is there something you're not telling us Logan?" Jean asked. There was something in his voice...  
  
"Time's wastin'." He said. They hurried to the corridor where Logan said she'd be. Rahne was at the door in her human form, slumped up against it and crying, quaking in fear with her plain white hospital gown drenched in sweat. Rahne could see them too, but couldn't make out any details thru her tears.  
  
"Please, please... jus' kill me... an' get it over with. Ye've taken enough o' muh life already. Don' make me go back...please... don' make me go back tae the labs..." Her voice was weak and hoarse, filled with desperation.  
  
"It's okay furtop, you're safe now. You're at the mansion, Rahne, surrounded by friends and no one can hurt you now." Moonstar said reassuringly as she and Jean cautiously approached the terrified young woman.  
  
"Dani? Is... that, really you?"  
  
"In the flesh, Rahne." Moonstar bent down next to Rahne and put her hand on Rahne's shoulder, "And we're here to help you." Rahne threw her arms tightly around Moonstar and wept.  
  
"Oh god, I thought ye wouldnae come f'r me! I thought it was jus' a dream!" she sobbed in relief. Moonstar hugged her old friend back to comfort her, and without meaning to, ran her hands over all the scars still on Rahne's back. It felt more akin to leather than human flesh.  
  
-Spirits, what did they do to her?- she thought. "We need to get you back to the medical lab, Rahne. You may have hurt yourself running around out here."  
  
"No! Nae more labs, please! I...I..." Rahne begged instinctively. She started to pull away, but Dani held her firmly in place  
  
"Calm down, Rahne. I promise you Rahne, you'll be fine. But we have to get you back to check you out. Me and Jean will be here right beside you the entire time."  
  
Moonstar, assisted by Jean's telekinetic powers, picked up Rahne and carried her back towards the lab. Both Wolverine and Nightcrawler stood back out of sight as the women walked past. Once the women were out of sight, Wolverine walked down the corridor to where they found Rahne and looked at the door.  
  
"You said you wanted me to see something, what is it?" Kurt asked impatiently as he looked back towards the corridor the women walked down.  
  
"Poor girl was terrified Kurt, look at what she did." Logan pointed to the door and Kurt saw the blood smeared across it.  
  
"Did she..." Kurt couldn't bring himself to finish his sentence.  
  
"She was so desperate to get out, she beat the door until her hands bled."  
  
Moonstar and Jean took Rahne back to the medi-lab where Cecelia was waiting. They placed Rahne back on the bed and tried their best to comfort her. Despite their reassurances, Rahne couldn't bring herself to let go of Dani's hand the entire time. Cecelia brought some anti-septic with which to clean the cuts on Rahne's hand, but Rahne visibly trembled as Cecelia walked towards her, even though the doctor had the wisdom to remove her scrubbs. Cecelia ran one of the medical scanners over Rahne's body, trying to determine if she had done any damage to herself in her 'escape' attempt. Though she wasn't about to tell Rahne, Cecelia was surprised that Rahne was actually able to run away. It was nothing short of a miracle that she got as far as she did.  
  
-She must have been incredibly desperate to just ignore the damage in her legs- She thought as she ran the scanner over Rahne's body. She sighed in relief as the scan revealed nothing had been broken. The casts on her arms were stretched a little, but they were otherwise fine.  
  
-Thank heaven for small favors. The only damage she may have done to herself was to her hands- Cecelia thought to herself. "Hello, Rahne, I'm Cecelia Reyes, the resident doctor. I need to swab those cuts on your hands to prevent them from being infected." Cecelia said in her most reassuring voice possible. Rahne still recoiled away from her in fear.  
  
"It's alright Rahne, she's one of us." Jean assured her.  
  
Rahne hesitantly reached out so Cecelia could examine her cuts. Even with Jean and Dani there, Cecelia could feel that her presence disturbed Rahne.  
  
"It doesn't look like you broke any bones, thankfully. Where'd you learn to punch like that?" She said, trying to make small talk. She had found it helped in the past to sooth anxious patients. Rahne, however, was completely silent, her eyes darting around all over the place, almost as if to make sure this was all indeed real. She didn't even acknowledge the anti- septic on her hands.  
  
-Poor girl must have gotten used too much worse pain- Cecelia observed to herself, "Is there anything you need while I'm here? How does your body feel?"  
  
Rahne didn't say a word.  
  
"I know your scared, Rahne, but I give you my word as an X-man you're safe now. You need to answer Cecelia's questions if she's going to help you." Jean stated.  
  
"Muh... throat hurts some, and it's hard t' swallow. I'm sore all o'er, but muh left leg hurts a lot." Rahne said quietly.  
  
"I'll take a look at your leg. Jean, why don't you get Rahne a glass of water?"  
  
As Cecelia examined Rahne's leg, she couldn't help but again notice the slight deformities in them. The untrained eye would have missed it, but she knew they were there. Muscles and cartilage had been damaged in Rahne's leg and she didn't want to think how long it would take for Rahne to make a decent recovery, if ever. She put that out of her mind as she found Rahne's (immediate) leg problem.  
  
"It looks like you just sprained your ankle. You'll need to keep off it for a few days, but it should be fine." Cecelia said. –The scanner must have missed it because it wasn't set to scan for sprains. Guess that's what you get for relying on the tech here so much, Reyes-  
  
Jean returned with the glass of water and gave it to Rahne. Rahne greedily drank it down, spilling most of it on herself.  
  
"T...thank ye, Jean." Rahne said quietly, "I'm... sorry f'r hittin' you, Ms. Reyes. I dinnae mean t' hurt ye, I...I... mean..."  
  
"It's okay, Rahne, I understand. I have a force field that protects me from any harm, so don't sweat it."  
  
"How...how did ye find me? I was in that...h...h... horrid place f'r so long..." Rahne asked, her voice barely above that of a whisper  
  
Jean and Moonstar exchanged a nervous glance. They didn't want to tell Rahne that her rescue was a case of pure, dumb luck. They weren't certain how she would handle that in her condition.  
  
"Chuck got worried when you hadn't checked in with us." Logan said as he walked into the lab with Kurt. He was lying thru his teeth, but he didn't care. He knew she needed to hear it.  
  
"We were so worried about you, Rahne." Kurt said. He put his hand on her shoulder to comfort her but,  
  
"DON'T TOUCH ME!" Rahne screamed, almost involuntarily. The others were taken back by her powerful statement, and for a moment, didn't know what to say.  
  
"I'm... sorry Kurt...I...I" Rahne tried to explain her actions, but she broke down into tears, weeping and babbling senselessly. Jean motioned for Kurt and Logan to leave as she and Dani attempted to calm Rahne down. It took a considerable amount of time, but when Rahne finally calmed down, she asked a question that she had been worrying about since she had realized she was safe.  
  
"Did... Kyle... make it oot tae?"  
  
Jean looked at Moonstar dumbfounded. Who was Kyle?  
  
"You...were the only one to make it out of there alive Rahne." Jean explained.  
  
"Oh." Rahne didn't seem to react much to the news other than with a single tear.  
  
"Are you hungry, Rahne?" Cecelia asked, though she already knew the answer. As far she could tell, Rahne was nourished intravenously for close to three months, and only enough to keep her alive. She had to be starving.  
  
"A wee bit."  
  
"I'll go make you some soup, okay? Jean, why don't we give Rahne and Dani some time alone?"  
  
"I'd like Jean tae stay...please?"  
  
"Alright Rahne, I'll be back in a moment with that soup, okay?" 


	4. Blame Game

***  
  
Nightcrawler stalked off, looking for someone to talk to. He had to admit that he felt hurt by the fact that Rahne didn't want his comfort thru this hard time, but he didn't want to burden poor Rahne with that knowledge. He wanted what was best for her, and if that didn't include him, so be it. He did need someone to talk to. He went to the lab where he knew he would find Hank. As he entered, Hank barely acknowledged him at all. He was too busy examining information on his computer.  
  
" Hank, I would like to talk to you about something…"  
  
Silence.  
  
" Hank, if you could spare a moment,"  
  
Nothing.  
  
"Hank, I just fell madly in love with Logan and need you to perform a sex change operation immediately!"  
  
" I'm sorry Kurt, did you say something?"  
  
" Never mind. It's Rahne, she awoke from her coma this morning."  
  
" She did? That's terrific news! How is she doing?"  
  
" I don't know, really. She doesn't want me with her right now."  
  
" And this you feel hurt by this?"  
  
"Ja. I care for her very much. When we were in Excalibur together, we became very close. Now she can't bear to touch me, and I don't know vhy. She's clinging to Jean, whom she barely knows."  
  
" Oh dear."  
  
"Vas? Is there something I should know about?"  
  
Hank looked at Kurt curiously for a moment before he responded, " Umm, it's a common post traumatic stress reaction among young females. Rahne is clinging to Jean, seeing her as a mother figure and emotionally reaching to her for support to help her cope with everything she's been thru."  
  
" Oh. So what have you been doing here? I saw you here last night, and something tells me that you haven't gotten any sleep since then."  
  
" I've been looking over this disc that Logan gave me. The information therein is quite fascinating. The comparative data on the different healing factors possessed by Marrow, Feral and the others reveals so much about the human immune system. They have discovered ways to limit nerve damage from deep wounds, and how to prevent a scar tissue from forming while still healing the wound. Combine that with the data they gathered on Wolfsbane's ability to transform, and I believe I might be able to synthesize a formula capable of healing the human body almost instantly!"  
  
" Wait a moment, mien friend, why are you looking at this data?"  
  
"I was reviewing the data on what those monsters inflicted on Rahne when I read their findings. The wealth of knowledge contained is enormous…"  
  
" Knowledge gained at the cost of human lives! Nothing good can come of it, why were you even looking at the data?"  
  
" I was informed that the disk contained detailed information on the heinous medical procedures that were performed on Rahne. If we're to be of any help to her at all, we need to know exactly what was done to her body. This other data may be utilized to help her recover, as well."  
  
" If you say so. But we use it only to help Rahne. She, and she alone, is the only person who deserves to benefit from what those evil men did to her."  
  
***  
  
Cecelia searched threw the shelves, looking for something she thought Rahne could stomach in her condition. Most of the X-Men, herself included, preferred spicy foods or something with taste. But she knew Rahne would have a tough time stomaching anything in her current state, so it was hard to find something she knew Rahne could eat. After a little search, she found a can of chicken soup.  
  
*A classic, to be sure. I thought you had finer tastes, though Ms. Reyes*  
  
Cecelia spun around and saw Emma Frost, A.K.A the White Queen. Despite how much she wanted to deny it, the woman's presence disturbed her a great deal. She just had a hard time trusting some one who had caused so much trouble in the past, reformed or not.  
  
" It's for Rahne. She's come out of her coma and she hasn't had any real food in some time. Those bastards just fed her intravenously, and only enough to keep her body alive for them to experiment on."  
  
" The poor child, I can't begin to imagine what was done to her. How is her condition now? I, along with every other telepath in the school, felt her flash of pain and fear when she awoke."  
  
" As far as I can tell, she's still in shock, emotionally. She's talking, if only a little bit, which is good. She nearly took my head off when she woke up, though. If or when she fully recovers emotionally though is beyond me. My area of expertise is the body, not the mind."  
  
" She's a very strong girl. I… knew her when she was younger. Is there any way that I can be of help?"  
  
" Yes, I read about your attempts to brainwash her. And I don't think that's called for here." Cecelia said coldly as she started the chicken soup. She made no secret of the fact that she didn't trust Emma, and took almost any opportunity to remind her of that.  
  
" That wasn't what I meant," Emma scowled, " and whether you believe it or not, I do care about her well being."  
  
" We all do. Excuse me, my patient is waiting." Cecelia poured the soup into a bowl and walked past Emma without even looking her in the face.  
  
***  
  
When Cecelia gave Rahne the soup, she pulled Jean aside for a moment to talk to her. To best help Rahne, she needed to know everything that had happened to her, and she didn't trust the idea that it was all contained in the C.D Logan had given Hank. Cecelia knew it was too soon to ask Rahne, but she hoped she might have volunteered some information, though she knew it wasn't very likely.  
  
" How is she? Has she said anything about what happened?"  
  
" She's barely spoken a word since you left. All I can sense from her is anxiety and guilt. I think she's afraid that she's going to wake from this and still be in that horrible lab."  
  
" Doctor Reyes! Come quick! Something's wrong with Rahne!"  
  
The two rushed into the room, where Rahne was leaning over the side of her bed, vomiting.  
  
" She was fine a minute ago and then she just got sick and started throwing up, what wrong with her?!" Moonstar asked frantically.  
  
Cecelia looked at the bowl and immediately saw the problem.  
  
" Nothing. She's fine. She just ate the soup too fast and upset her stomach."  
  
" I'm so sorry Ms. Reye, I was jus'… so hungry… an' I …I" Rahne said, almost hysterical.  
  
" It's okay, Rahne, It's okay, calm down. I understand. I'll bring you some more soup, and you'll just have to eat it slower, all right? Dani, why don't you get some towels to clean this up, okay?"  
  
" I'm…so sorry fer causing ye trouble…" Rahne said softly.  
  
" It's okay Rahne. I'm a doctor. It's your job to cause me trouble, sweetheart."  
  
***  
  
After Rahne finished her fourth bowl of soup, Moonstar decided that it was time to find out what the hell had happened to her.  
  
" Rahne, we need to talk about what happened to you while you were a prisoner on that island. What exactly did they do to you on that island?"  
  
" I don' remember." Rahne said without emotion.  
  
" That's a lie, Rahne. You never were much good when it came to lying. If you didn't remember, why would you ask about Kyle? And how did you know that you were held for so long?" Rahne just turned away, unable to look Dani in the eyes.  
  
" I… don' want to talk aboot it."  
  
" I know you don't, Rahne, but you need to. You can't make it thru this alone, and you certainly don't have too. What happened to you?"  
  
*Dani! This isn't the time to be interrogating her about what happened to her! She's traumatized enough!* Jean 'yelled' at her telepathically.  
  
*You think I want to do this? Do you? I have no choice! I've been inside her mind more than anyone else in her entire life! I know her! The longer she doesn't talk about what happened, the longer she has to repress it! Like when we fought the Beyonder, like she tried to do when Doug died! I've seen her do it too many times in the past, and I won't let it happen here!* Dani snapped back.  
  
"Nothing. I DON' REMEMBER! Please, jus' stop it…" Rahne begged.  
  
" I can't, Rahne. I wish I could, but I can't. I need to know what happened."  
  
" I said I don' remember!"  
  
" At least tell me why you're stone walling me, Rahne, you owe me that much. Just tell me why you don't want to talk about it, and I'll drop it."  
  
" Promise? On yuir honor?"  
  
"On my honor, Rahne. Just tell me why." It was a lie, of course. Honor be damned, Dani would sacrifice it a thousand times over to help Rahne, but this way she could at least gain some insight into what happened. Or so she believed.  
  
Rahne looked Dani in the eyes and said, " Because I deserved everythin' they did to muh body. Happy?" 


	5. Necessities

"…. And fourth quarter earnings look better than ever. Our investments in the Middle East, while pragmatic, on doing fine. Our joint venture with Oracle has blah, blah, blah…"  
  
Despite himself, Warren Kenneth Worthington the Third, A.K.A the high flying Angel of the X-Men and head of Worthington Industries, couldn't bring himself to focus on what his C.E.O was saying. It wasn't as though he didn't want too. After all, thousands trusted him to make the right decisions regarding his company and he wasn't about to betray that trust. Ever. But today was different from most. He had received a phone call from the Daily Bugle asking if he had any comments about the actions of his old family friend, John Calvin. Without a second thought, he had told them that he was always proud to call John Calvin his friend and that they could go fuck themselves. As soon as he hung the phone, he knew that he would regret saying that, as they would no doubt quote him in tomorrow's paper. To make matters worse, immediately after that, Kurt had called him to tell him what had happened when Rahne awoke. The thought that he had just defended a man who could instill such terror in someone both shamed and confused him.  
  
-He was such a great man. Why would he do something like this?- Warren thought to himself. Everyone, from the papers, to news reporters to the man on the street, considered John Calvin nothing more than a modern day Dr. Mengele, a sadist disguised as a doctor. But Warren knew better. He knew how John had donated a two billion dollar trust fund to the Red Cross and how he personally trained nurses for Doctors without Borders. He knew how John normally worked eighteen hours a day, six days a week to help others. If he wasn't running one of the most successful and compassionate medical companies in the world, he was doing everything he could to make the world a better place in one way or another, regardless of the personal consequences. Calvin had testified many times in front of congress, stating flat out that insurance and medical companies gouged their customers, infuriating his stockholders. When asked for proof of price gauging, he responded, " Not everyone in America can afford insurance, despite the fact that they need it to live a full and productive life. That, senator, is my proof."  
  
"Sir? Are you listening?"  
  
Warren snapped back to reality, " Yes, I'm sorry. I'm just a little distracted today. You were saying?"  
  
" I was saying that our projected fourth quarter figures are best judged by our past earnings, and not our single recent failure with Stane International."  
  
" You mean that we should be judged on our total actions, and not one mistake that we have made that we openly regret."  
  
" That's correct sir. Your thoughts?"  
  
" Not likely to happen. I guess it takes to much effort to look at the big picture." Warren sighed.  
  
  
  
***  
  
Despite the fact that it was two o clock in the morning, Rahne Sinclair fought hard to stay awake. The fact that the lights were on helped some. Cecelia had briefly turned them off to let her rest, but she had a panic attack the moment they were off. The dark terrified her. They would leave her in complete darkness in-between torture sessions and experiments. When the darkness became light, the pain would only get worse and more horrific, leaving Rahne to truly dread it. Even when she closed her eyes. And it wasn't as though she wasn't tired. Dani, despite her promise not to, had tried to pry the details of her captivity out of her most of the day and she barely had the strength to lift her arms, after all. She just didn't want to fall asleep. She knew what was waiting for her when she did, so she tried to stay awake by thinking something, anything other than what happened to her. But it wasn't easy. She slowly traced her hands over her body; feeling for the scars she knew had once been there. While she couldn't feel them, the touch of her hands on her skin felt off. Wrong. Like static across her entire body.  
  
-According t' what mum used tae tell me, the device they use to heal scars can't completely heal the nerves- she thought to herself matter of factly. Without really meaning too, Rahne realized she had just thought about her mother for the first time since she had come out of her coma. But the thought of her dead mother didn't depress her or make her sad in the slightest, like it had before she was taken. She just accepted it as fact now. And that hurt Rahne almost as much as the death of her mother once had.  
  
-I couldnae even properly mourn the death of the only real family I've ever had! -She thought bitterly.  
  
She was kidnapped shortly after she had landed in Scotland. They were waiting for her at the airport in secret. When she hailed for a cab, they came and picked her up. All she remembered about the ride was smelling something odd during the ride, and then awaking in a cell. She fought them with all her strength at first, but when they got tired of it… By the end of her first week as their prisoner, Rahne was no longer crying because her mother was dead. She was crying because she wasn't dead along with her. Rahne tried to put the thoughts of what happened to her while she was a prisoner out of her mind, but it was difficult. The images out what happened to her were etched into her soul. Even now, every time she looked around her room, she was reminded of her suffering, her pain. The medi-lab she was resting in, even though it was filled with flowers and get-well cards, reminded her of the labs she was tortured all the same. Where they performed operations and examinations where they would violate her body like they might a lab rat. She blinked back a tear, and found she didn't have the strength to open her eyes again. She reluctantly decided to stop fighting it, to go to sleep. She knew when she was beaten. But for the first time in months, she fell asleep not wanting to die. But that didn't mean that she wanted to wake up again, either.  
  
  
  
***  
  
As she opened her eyes, she saw that she was back in the labs. She was nude and her body was wracked with pain. She could hear the doctors walking towards her.  
  
" No, the X-Men, they rescued me! I escaped!" she exclaimed as she saw them gather around her bed. She tried to get up to run away, but she couldn't. She was still strapped down.  
  
" It was just a dream, whore. You're still helping the cause of science!" One doctor smirked. The rolled her bed into an adjoining room, filled with all kinds of medical instruments. She summoned her powers, but they were useless. The bonds were too strong, and she was far too weak, even in her change form. She was alone now, but she tried to be brave.  
  
"Lets take a look at that extra muscle mass that's in your leg today, shall we?" One doctor asked as he held a scalpel in the air for her to see. She saw a look in the doctor's eyes she had seen a million times before. He was getting pleasure out of the pain he inflicted. That look alone caused all her courage to flee her.  
  
" Don', please, no more, ye done enough t' me…"  
  
The doctor just ignored her, and made a slow, deliberate horizontal cut along her left ankle. She tried to scream as incredible pain shot thru her body, but found she couldn't. She briefly considered changing back into her human form, just to spite them, but she feared what they would do to her then even more.  
  
" I must say, the extra growth and expansion here is incredible! If we could duplicate it, under controlled conditions, we may be able to decrease the amount of time trauma victims spend in recovery!" Another doctor commented. She barely noticed what they were saying; her mind was red with pain. She was in to much pain to even scream. The doctor made another cut, this time vertically. When he peeled the skin and nerves back and poked his thumb inside her leg; she found the strength to scream again.  
  
" Arrghhh!" Emma Frost awoke, her mind filled with imagined pain.  
  
-What just happened?-she asked herself, but she already knew the answer. She realized that she must have 'latched' on to Rahne's pain as she slept. Oddly enough, she wasn't all that angry that her night had been interrupted by Rahne's nightmares. She was used to nightmares, after all. She was at ground zero when Genosha was destroyed. Despite the fact that her diamond form, which was indestructible and saved her life during the attack, lacked true telepathy, she still felt the death screams of millions in her mind. The screams were slight, but Emma Frost had been a telepath all her life. She was always psi-sensitive, regardless of her body. A slight smile came to her face, though; as she remembered the revenge she took on the woman who caused all that death and destruction. It certainly wasn't pleasant, but very fulfilling.  
  
-Lets see if I can do anything about Rahne's problem- With little effort, Frost's mind left her body via her astral form and traveled to the medi- lab, where Rahne was sleeping. She saw as Rahne's head twisted from side to side, obviously in distress. Without a second thought, Frost reached inside of Rahne's mind and attempted to sooth her. Immediately and with incredible force, she was thrown out of Rahne's mind, overwhelmed by pain and shame.  
  
-Her pain, it's too much for me to handle while she's asleep. The training Xavier gave her to resist mind control, coupled with her trauma means I'm helpless to help her with my powers-she scowled to herself. She hated the fact that the young Scots woman was in so much pain, while she was helpless to do anything about it. Despite her cold exterior, she cared for all children in pain, mutant or otherwise. She 'walked' over to Rahne and ran her hand over Rahne's cheek affectionately.  
  
-No child should suffer like this-She thought to herself. As she thought that, she realized that she had another problem that Rahne would be causing, something that she needed to deal with immediately. She returned to her body and started to scan her telepathic students. Five of them had latched onto Rahne's dream, while others were coming close to doing so as well. Calling on the skill she had built up over twenty years with her telepathy, she broke the connection that her students had to Rahne and blocked any connections before they could be made. Emma knew that while Rahne slept would be the best time top deal with her problems 'easily', but cursed the fact that she was forced to chose between the best interests of one child over the best interests of her many children.  
  
-This situation needs to be dealt with quickly, before it can get any worse- Frost thought to herself. She genuinely wanted to help Rahne, but if Rahne posed a danger to her other students, she wouldn't stand for it.  
  
  
  
***  
  
-It's not the best breakfast in the world, but I'm a doctor, not a chef- Cecelia Reyes thought to herself as she trekked towards Rahne's room, -Though I doubt Rahne would complain any if the food was burned to a crisp -  
  
It had been five days since Rahne had come out of her coma, and she still hadn't divulged any details whatsoever about what had happened to her. She routinely alternated from insisting that she deserved what happened without ever explaining why, to saying that she didn't remember anything, which of course was complete bull-shit.  
  
-Girl should at least keep her story straight- Cecelia thought to herself.  
  
Rahne would wake up screaming at least twice a night, but she would still insist that she didn't remember anything at all. When she didn't wake up screaming, she sweated like a pig in her sleep, always soaking her sheets. Despite how filthy she would become, Rahne hated it when Cecelia and Dani helped her bathe and resisted the idea as much as she could.  
  
-God only knows what's going thru her head now- Cecelia thought to herself. When Rahne wasn't avoiding questions about what happened to her, she was just staring quietly into space. She absolutely refused to see anyone other than Hank, Jean, Dani and Cecelia herself. She never explained why, though.  
  
As Cecelia entered Rahne's room with her breakfast, eggs and applesauce, she saw Rahne lying in bed on her side, sleeping peacefully, or so it seemed. Her sheets, however, were soaked in sweat and Cecelia could smell them from the doorway, per usual. She placed the food on Rahne's tray, and debated on whether or not to wake Rahne up. She looked so peaceful now, so innocent…  
  
" She's faking, she's awake." Dani said. Cecelia didn't even notice Dani slumped over in a chair in the corner until she had spoken up.  
  
" You sure?"  
  
" Yup. Trust me." Dani decided against mentioning that Rahne had been crying softly to herself for the last ten minutes. As much as she wanted to comfort her friend, the moment she moved in the slightest, Rahne stopped crying and would pretend to be asleep.  
  
  
  
" I was jus' restin' some." Rahne said weakly. She sat up and Cecelia adjusted the bed so that Rahne could eat her breakfast comfortably.  
  
" I'm nae hungry."  
  
"Too bad, you're going to eat anyway." Cecelia replied.  
  
" Ye need t' watch me eat?" She asked bitterly.  
  
" Yes." Both women answered. Rahne ate little less than half before she pushed the plate away.  
  
" I'm finished." She said forcefully.  
  
" You need to eat more than that Rahne. Your body needs everything it can get right now." Dani said, her voice filled with concern.  
  
" Don' talk tae me like ye muh mother, Dani. Yuir not. She's dead and buried."  
  
" That doesn't mean that there aren't people who love you just as much." Dani replied.  
  
" Ms. Reyes, why can't I 'feel' muh powers anymore?"  
  
" According to Hank, in order for your body to transform into a lupine state like it does, it has to store massive amounts of nutrients that allow the muscle and hair growth accompanied with your change. Your stores of vitamins and such have been almost completely depleted by your recovery. You should be able to transform again, but it may be a few days. But you can begin your physical therapy now, to regain the strength in your legs."  
  
"Great. I get tae' learn t' walk all over again." She spat.  
  
"I can't begin to imagine how hard this is for you Rahne, but you should try to maintain a positive outlook." Cecelia said as she brought a wheel chair into the room.  
  
"After what I lived thru doctor, that was bein' positive."  
  
Without giving a response, she gave Rahne a large t-shirt to put on. She then carefully helped her get into a pair of sweat pants, taking care not to agitate Rahne's damaged leg muscles.  
  
"Do you need me to help?"  
  
" Ye don' need tae watch me all day, Dani. I'll be fine without you hoverin' aboot all the time."  
  
" I got this, Dani. Why don't you change the sheets on the bed and get some fresh air? You look like you need it."  
  
  
  
***  
  
Dr. Henry McCoy looked over his program one last time before he started his recordings. He didn't feel right about what he was planning on doing, but when he 'saw' what he did, he felt that to turn away from it would be a far greater crime. With the flip of a button, he started recording his hypothesis.  
  
" Using the information extracted from several individuals possessing healing factors and combining it with information relating to Wolfsbane's, A.K.A Rahne Sinclair's ability to transform into a lupine state, I may have stumbled onto the greatest discovery in medical history. However, I feel a computer simulation is at the moment a more prudent route at the moment due to the fact that the information may not be reliable. The simulation will recreate what happens when a damaged cell is subjected to a chemical compound devised thru the information provided by Mr. Calvin's …research."  
  
Hank pressed enter on his computer and watched what transpired. As he saw the simulation run its course, his eyes light up like child's at Christmas.  
  
" Oh my stars and fucking garters…"  
  
***  
  
As Dani stripped Rahne's bed, she couldn't believe how bad it smelt. If she was the melodramatic type, or Wolverine, she would have considered it the smell of fear.  
  
-Smells like a gym locker! I didn't think someone could sweat so much- she thought to herself, -Rahne continues to impress me-  
  
" Dani, could we speak for a moment?"  
  
Moonstar felt a chill down her spine when she heard that voice. After all, it belonged to a woman who attempted to brainwash her more than a few times. Emma Frost, the White Queen.  
  
" Not now, I have something more important to do than talk to a former supervillain. Laundry."  
  
" Then let me help you and we can talk as we go." Emma refused to acknowledge the supervillain comment. She was never a supervillain, just a woman who used her god given abilities to help others like herself. At least, that's how she saw it, and the hell with the rest of the world.  
  
Dani, without missing a beat, threw one of Rahne's sweat soaked blankets right in Emma's face, " Thanks a lot. I mean that." –She's a telepath and she didn't see that one coming?- Dani smirked to herself. She picked up the rest of the covers and walked towards the laundry room. Emma barely contained her anger and followed.  
  
" I think Rahne needs some… special care, Dani. I know you care about her, but you can only do so much for her. I think I may be of great help to her."  
  
Dani just ignored her as she loaded the covers into the washer machine.  
  
" You can't do this on your own, Danielle. Let me help her."  
  
Dani spun around, incensed by Frost's comments.  
  
" I know exactly what your help entails, thank you. Your 'help' makes the person dependant on you for the rest of their lives!"  
  
" I want nothing more than to help a young woman who's in pain right now! I don't have an agenda here, Dani! I just want to help Rahne!"  
  
" So you say! I remembered how you 'helped' the Hellions! Trained them to fight for you and the Hellfire Club, but you didn't deem fit to train them to think for themselves, did you? Or was it an accident that the moment you were taken out of the picture, they were all easily killed by some two bit thug?"  
  
Furious over the suggestion that she was responsible for the death of her first students, Emma transformed into her diamond form and lashed out at Dani. With little effort, Dani ducked under the strike, and in one fluid movement, grabbed Emma's arms, pulled her close, arched her back and threw Frost over her shoulder into the far wall. Frost, unharmed physically but seething inside, got to her feet and lunged at Dani. In response, Dani created one of her psychic arrows and readied herself for Frost's attack. But before either of them could hurt the other, they both froze, unable to move.  
  
" I know the situation with Rahne is hard on us all," Jean Grey said calmly, " But getting into a fight won't help anything."  
  
" Beating Frost within an inch of her life would certainly make me feel better." Dani muttered under her breath.  
  
" All I want to do is help a young woman who is in incredible pain! Not to be insulted by some self righteous brat!"  
  
" Your help is worse than no help at all!" Dani spat.  
  
" Look, Emma, I know you mean well, but I think that you should leave this matter for others who know Rahne better, and who Rahne will trust. I'm sorry, Emma, but that doesn't include you."  
  
" Fine! Let the poor girl be traumatized because you were to proud to ask my help!" Frost said as she stormed out.  
  
" Not that I like taking Emma's side, but she has changed a lot since you last…encountered her, Dani."  
  
" So they tell me, Jean. But that sure as hell doesn't make up for all the brainwashing attempts. And she's still a bitch."  
  
"Yeah, well, some things never change. Me and the others just started breakfast, care to join us?"  
  
" Sure. Thanks for the help back there. I don't think that the professor would have been to pleased with me if I put one of his teachers in traction." Dani said as they went to the mansion's private dining room. Despite the fact that the school had been recently overhauled to accommodate all the new students, the Professor preferred that his older students had a place to eat and gather in private so they wouldn't be bothered by the new students. Right now, it was only being used by the Professor, Logan, Kurt and Scott.  
  
"Pull up a chair and join us, chief. Looks like ya been burning the midnight oil." Logan said as he handed Dani an already made plate.  
  
" More like the oil's been burning me."  
  
" Has Rahne spoken any about what happened to her?" Kurt asked, his voice filled with concern. He knew Rahne personally from his time on Muir Isle, and cared deeply about her welfare. The fact that Rahne now wanted nothing to do with him troubled him greatly.  
  
" Not a word, and it's not for lack of trying. Every time that I get remotely close to the subject about what they did to her, she shuts me out. I didn't think she could be so damn stubborn."  
  
" Yes, she is her mother's daughter in that regard," Xavier commented, " Have you been able to glean any details about what happened at all? I don't know how well we'll be able to help her until she admits to herself what happened."  
  
" Like I said, she's refused to talk about it at all."  
  
" Have you seen about getting her some professional help?" Cyclops suggested.  
  
" I've looked into that, Scott, but I'm afraid that isn't possible. Given what Rahne's lived thru before she was kidnapped, I can't think of many therapists that could truly appreciate what's she's going thru now. The few who could, are not an option. Dr. Rory Campbell, whom she knew from Excalibur, is no where to be found, and her first therapist, Dr. Samson, is off chasing the Hulk."  
  
" Don't need a shrink ta' tell ya' what's goin' thru her head. She's hurt and confused right now, at why someone would experiment on her like that, and how god would let someone do somethin' so horrible to one of his children." Logan said, " I got some experience bein' a lab rat, after all."  
  
"I don't suppose that you'd be willing to talk to her, would you Logan? She's doing everything she can to shut me out."  
  
" I doubt I could get thru to her. Crazy canucks don't mix well with church girls. I know it's hard, but you'll just have to be there for her, even though she'll do everything she can to push you away."  
  
" Don't worry. The harder she pushes me away, the harder I'll hold on."  
  
" There is also another problem concerning Rahne that we need to address. Emma has brought to my attention the fact that her nightmares are starting to affect our other telepathic students. I don't think that Rahne can stay in the medi-lab much longer."  
  
" That bitch… so she can't get her claws into Rahne so she pulls this… So what? You're going to throw her out now?" Dani snapped.  
  
" That's not what he's suggesting at all, Dani. Give the Professor a moment to explain, if it's not to much trouble."  
  
" Thank you, Scott." Xavier said. He was a little taken back by the force of Scott's statement, which was unusually aggressive for him, but that didn't matter right now, "I'll excuse that statement due to the fact that you have been under stress, Dani. I have never abandoned a student in need, and I certainly won't start with Rahne. And for the record, Emma has been the one who has kept Rahne from affecting the students at great personal expense. It's been very taxing on her mentally. But that's beside the point. I think it would be wise to move her. I was going to suggest that we let her recover in the guesthouse. Hank has designed some psi-dampeners that will prevent any students from latching on to her nightmares and I also think that Rahne will be far more comfortable there than in the medi- lab."  
  
" Not that I have a problem with it, but this is the first I've heard of this suggestion." Jean said.  
  
" I'm sorry Jean, I talked it over with Scott last night. I thought that he had discussed it with you already. Not to worry, though. The room that I set aside for you two in the mansion will afford you plenty of privacy."  
  
" That's alright Professor, me and Scott won't have to move out of the house. There are two bedrooms in it, after all. Dani will need someone helping her with Rahne, and Rahne's perfectly comfortable with me."  
  
" Are you sure about this, Jean? It won't be easy for to be in Rahne's presence when she's asleep."  
  
" Sometimes, things that need to be done in life aren't easy. Doesn't mean they don't have to be done." 


	6. The Truth revealed

Chapter 6 The Truth revealed  
  
Some time later...  
  
"Push with all your strength now." Cecelia said to Rahne. Rahne was lying on a mat on the floor with Cecelia holding Rahne's her legs in the air, bent slightly back. Rahne had been trying for the last five minutes to extend her leg while Cecelia tried to stop it by pressing her hands against the base of Rahne's feet. The point of the exercise was to build back up the strength in Rahne's legs that had been lost following her injures. Rahne, for her part, really wasn't cooperating.  
  
"I'm tryin'." Rahne said, dejectedly.  
  
"No you're not. You've barely even tried. The sooner you do this, the sooner you can do something else." Cecelia chided  
  
Without responding, Rahne tried to lash out with her leg as best she could, hoping to 'accidentally' hit Cecelia and shut her up. Cecelia expected that however, and continued the exercise. Cecelia had to admit, she was very impressed that Rahne's legs showed the strength that they did, though that it wasn't much.  
  
"Her body's recovery is unlike anything I've ever seen." The young doctor observed to herself, "Her body's still in relatively good shape, atrophy is minimum, she shows no physical signs of depression whatsoever despite the fact that has a severe case, and her recovery is faster than anyone that I've ever seen. She'll be ready for crutches in days, if that. How long before she recovers mentally though?"  
  
"Ms. Reyes?"  
  
"Yes, Rahne?"  
  
"When... will I be able t' walk again?" Rahne asked carefully, not exactly certain she wanted an answer  
  
Cecelia gritted her teeth. Despite the many, many times she had done it in the past, she was never very comfortable about delivering bad news when it came to a person's long-term health. The pleading she saw in their eyes, for her to somehow defy medical science and make them all better, pulled at her soul every time.  
  
"It's...complicated. When you were... experimented on, they did massive damage to your leg cartilage and muscles. What's worse is that you suffered considerable atrophy because of how long you were strapped down to a bed. We were able reattach and repair most of the damaged muscles, but the damage was already done by then. I'm afraid that you'll likely need crutches for the rest of your life."  
  
"Oh, I... see." Was Rahne's only reaction, which worried Cecelia immensely.  
  
"I can't believe how strongly she's repressing her pain. Anger seems to be the only emotion she's allowing herself to feel." Cecelia thought.  
  
"A cripple. A bloody cripple. Serves me right, f'r muh sins." Rahne thought to herself.  
  
"We've done enough exercise for today Rahne. Why don't we get you back to your room so you can rest?" Cecelia suggested  
  
Rahne didn't respond. She just crawled back up into her wheel chair, waving off any help from Cecelia.  
  
"I'll take that as a yes." Cecelia wheeled Rahne back to her room, and helped her get back into her bed.  
  
"Is there anything you need Rahne? A book, perhaps?" Cecelia suggested  
  
"Yes. Fer... everyone... tae... leave... me... alone. I don' deserve anyone's concern, sympathy or pity!" Rahne said emphatically.  
  
"And why is that Rahne? You keep saying that, but you never say why. What makes you think that you deserved what happened to you?"  
  
Rahne was silent.  
  
"Before I removed the scars from the front of your body, I saw evidence of sulfuric acid burns along with signs of frost bite. I also saw evidence that your toe and fingernails had pulled out. Why did you deserve that? How could you deserve that?" Cecelia demanded.  
  
Rahne didn't respond at first, but tears were forming in her eyes and she bit her bottom lip so hard that it bled.  
  
"I... jus' do." Rahne said as she wiped the small speck of blood away.  
  
She didn't have to respond, though. Cecelia, recalling what Dani had told her about Rahne's upbringing, how strict and harsh it was, and suddenly realized why Rahne blamed herself so strongly. Cecelia had seen it a thousand times in the E.R and right now, wanted to kick herself for not realizing it sooner. Cecelia quickly changed the subject.  
  
"Look, Rahne, we can take those casts off your arm today. Let me find Dani, and we'll get that done, okay?"  
  
Rahne just nodded her head in agreement.  
  
***  
  
Although she was surrounded by the Brood with no means of retreat, Danielle Moonstar couldn't really bring herself to much focus on her predicament.  
  
"Why her, of all people?" Dani thought to herself as she hit another broodling with one of her psychic arrows. Dani needed to burn off some hatred, hatred at those who had tortured her closest friend, hatred at the great spirits or whatever Supreme Being there was for letting something so horrible happen to some one so innocent, before she saw Rahne again, and the Danger Room was the perfect place to do it, even if it made Dani feel guilty for not being at Rahne's side. Only it wasn't working as planned. Dani was still pissed. She rolled and hit another one of creatures without breaking a sweat.  
  
"I'm too used to hitting something to solve my problems." Dani thought to herself, "And that's not about to help bring back the old Rahne. The old Rahne who blushed the entire time in sex education, who was always so full of life, who had the sweetest smile."  
  
Two more brood launched themselves at Dani while she deep in thought. In a fluid motion, she ducked under them and unleashed her powers at the deadly alien insects, hit them her arrows.  
  
"Spirits, I miss that smile so much now. She was such an innocent and naïve girl. She was the only New Mutant who didn't know that Craig was her father. Why on earth does she think that she deserved what happened to her?"  
  
Lost in her thoughts, Dani almost didn't notice a single broodling sneak up behind her. Almost. She readied a psychic arrow and steadied herself but before she could do anything, it faded away and the entire environment disappeared. Dani spun around and saw Cecelia standing by the control panel. For some reason, Dani dreaded what Cecelia was going to say, even though she had no idea what it was, just by judging from the expression on her face.  
  
"Dani, we need to talk about Rahne."  
  
"What's wrong? Is she okay? Spirits, stupid question, I mean, is there another problem?" Dani asked worriedly  
  
"I think I know why Rahne blames herself for what happened to her, Dani and... it's pretty bad." When Cecelia explained her suspicions and told Dani her supporting evidence, Dani felt weak in the knees and was crying for her friend.  
  
"Nononononononono, not her please not her not Rahne," Dani pleaded as she shook her head, as if in the hopes to dislodge the suspicions of the X- Men's doctor from her mind, "please not that, no..."  
  
"I'm so sorry." Cecelia said as she put her hands on Dani's shoulder to both comfort and steady her, "I know this is hard."  
  
"Are you sure? Couldn't you be wrong?" she asked desperately.  
  
"I don't think so. I really wish I was. But I've worked the E.R enough recognize to the symptoms, and I talked to Hank before I came here. We compared notes, and he agrees with me. She's hurt and confused right now, emotionally unable to come to terms with what happened. I think that's why she's lashing out at everyone."  
  
"Spirits, why the hell didn't you tell me about this sooner!?" Dani asked as she smacked Cecelia's hand away. Dani was livid now, her only defense mechanism against breaking down herself.  
  
"Because we didn't know and we all thought it was best that Rahne come to us about what happened, rather than trying to pry it out of her. But, if I'm right, that may not be a good idea. Do you think you can get her to open up?"  
  
"I...I'll... do my best. I'll confront her about it once we get her casts off. I like Hel that you're wrong."  
  
"So do I, Dani. So do I."  
  
Dani took a moment to collect herself, wiping the tears from her face, "What do I need to know to help her, if you're right?"  
  
***  
  
"They don' know. What will they think of me when they do?" Rahne fearfully asked herself as she heard Cecelia and Dani return. She wasn't sure how long she could keep her secret from them and that worried her incredibly. In time they would know, and they would hate her for it.  
  
"We're ready to get those casts off your arms now Rahne. Dani, could you help me hold her arms steady?" Cecelia asked as she looked around for her surgical scissors. Once she found them, she walked towards Rahne, but that's not what, and who, Rahne saw.  
  
Rahne saw a faceless doctor in medical scrubs that were splattered in blood. Her blood. The same doctor who had tortured her so many times before. She looked around and saw that she was back the room where she had been experimented in for so long, strapped down nude to a medical bed in preparation to be tortured further. She could hear the woman walk towards her, smell the anti-septic in the room and feel the straps on her wrists and ankles holding her down, making her helpless to defend herself.  
  
"No! Nooo! Get away!!" Rahne screamed as she thrashed about frantically.  
  
"Rahne! Rainy! Calm down! It's okay, It's okay!" Dani said as she tried to restrain her friend to prevent her from hurting herself. Rahne blinked twice, and realized she was still at the mansion, still safe.  
  
"I... was there, back in the labs. I... know I was. I could even smell it..." Rahne explained, quite dumfounded and shaking like a leaf.  
  
"No, you weren't, Rahne. You were here the entire time..." Dani reassured her.  
  
"She must have had a flash back when she saw me, Dani." Cecelia explained, "They happen in cases of trauma like... this."  
  
"What do ye mean, 'in cases like this'?" Rahne asked, still quaking from what she 'saw'.  
  
"It's hard to explain, Rahne. Sometimes when a person lives thru something as... traumatic as what you survived Rahne, sometimes they may... relive the experience when they see something that reminds them of what they went thru. Sometimes it happens with P.O.Ws, or in cases of child abuse."  
  
"So, I'm ne'er gonna truly be free o' the labs, am I?" Rahne said miserably  
  
"You're already are free, Rahne. And I promise you, with our help, you'll be free of the nightmares as well."  
  
Rahne looked away, as though she couldn't truly believe Cecelia.  
  
"Rahne, why don't you close you eyes while she takes your casts off? It might be easier for you." Dani said. Rahne nodded in response. Cecelia quickly cut the casts off and peeled them back. Rahne's skin underneath was pale and flaky, since it had been weeks since they were exposed to the air.  
  
"I think we ought to give you a bath now that we got those casts off, Rahne. It'll help wash away all the dead skin and I'm sure you'll feel a lot better afterwards." Cecelia suggested  
  
"I may as well. I feel filthy as it is." Rahne said. Cecelia and Dani glanced at each other, as though the statement confirmed a suspicion. Dani helped her out of her bed and into her wheel chair. When they got to the tub, Rahne tried to stand up to get in the tub with her cloths still on, but almost fell down before Dani caught her.  
  
"Whoa! Slow down a sec, Rahne! You have to get undressed first before you take a bath, you know."  
  
"I ken bathe muhself, thank ye, Dani. I don' need yuir help." Rahne said coarsely.  
  
"Not in your condition, Rahne. We've been thru this already. There's no shame in admitting that you need help, and we're both women here. Now hold your legs out so we can get these sweat pants off." Dani said. Rahne complied, and once Dani got Rahne's shirt off, Dani again saw all the scars that littered Rahne's back. There were at least two-dozen of them all over. Some were small; others were somewhat oddly shaped, while a several, rugged and twisted like ropes, ran the entire length of her back. On some parts, Rahne's scars had scars on them, several looked sickeningly like cigarette burns. Rahne's entire back looked like one might expect the back of a rebellious slave of the old South to look like, rough and ugly undeserved scars on every inch, marring the body of an innocent.  
  
"Spirits, there are so many." Dani sighed silently, and not for the first time.  
  
"It's a tic tac toe board, isn't it?" Rahne asked, "I cannae even feel muh back anymore."  
  
"It's... nothing we can't fix, Rahne. Don't you worry about it." Dani said as she helped Rahne into the tub. Dani couldn't help but notice how Rahne was trembling when she was fully inside the tub.  
  
"Something wrong, Rahne? You look uncomfortable." Dani asked  
  
"It's jus' that...they...nothin'. I'm fine."  
  
Dani turned the water on and left to get some washcloths. When she came back, the room was thick with steam. Dani could see that Rahne had started filling the tub, and she went over to test the water with her hand.  
  
"Yow!" She yelped. Dani quickly turned the hot water down and turned the cold water up. Rahne didn't seem the least bit concerned about, or effected by, the heat.  
  
"Cripes Rahne, you could have burned yourself! What were you thinking?" Dani demanded as she looked Rahne over for any signs of scalding. Thankfully, she didn't find any.  
  
Rahne just looked away, unable to meet Dani's gaze. "I'm filthy. I jus' want...I need tae be clean, is all an' I've had enough o' cold water."  
  
"Well, that's why we're here. I'll wash your back, okay?"  
  
"Fine."  
  
As Dani helped Rahne bathe, Dani noted how Rahne scrubbed herself with the washcloth. Rahne was slow and deliberate, concentrating mainly on her lower body, and scrubbed herself so hard that Rahne left red marks on her skin. Rahne did that all over her body for a considerable amount of time. Dani also noticed that Rahne seemed to wince, ever so slightly, every time she touched her. This was all nothing new of course, but Dani didn't see these actions in the same light as she did before. Dani took a shampoo bottle and placed a small amount in Rahne's short hair and scrubbed it in.  
  
"Okay, Rahne, you're going to need to lean back to get this out." Dani started to gently pull Rahne back so that they could rinse the soap out of her hair, but Rahne's arms shot to the side of the tub with incredible speed and strength, holding her firmly in place.  
  
"I'm nae leanin' back, Dani." Rahne said, her voice filled with fear.  
  
"What? Why?"  
  
"I jus' don' want tae."  
  
"Rahne, it'll be alright. I'm right here and I won't let you drown." Dani said soothingly "We just need to get the shampoo out of your hair. It'll only take a minute, promise."  
  
"It ken stay in muh hair f'r all I care, Dani. I'm nae leanin' back."  
  
Dani decided not to press the point. She cupped her hands, and poured the water over Rahne's head to get the shampoo out.  
  
"Is there any reason why you don't want to lean back?" Dani asked.  
  
Rahne didn't reply, but she insisted on bathing for two hours before she finally agreed to get out. Dani helped her out of the tub and into a robe before she took Rahne back to her room. When Dani got Rahne back into bed, Dani closed the door to the room and locked it shut.  
  
"Time for the moment of truth, Moonstar." She thought to herself.  
  
Dani took a deep breath. Dani knew what she had to do, but she would have preferred it that Rahne come to her for help, that she didn't have to tear it out of Rahne like this. But Dani also knew that Rahne would never come to her, or indeed anyone, about something like this. Rahne would just bottle up it up while it ate away at her soul for the rest of her life.  
  
And Dani would die a thousands times before she let that happen to anyone, let alone Rahne.  
  
Dani walked over to Rahne and sat down beside her, her hands clasped together in front of her.  
  
"Rahne, we... need to talk about something."  
  
"I told ye, time an' again, I dinnae remember whit those horrid men did t' me, Dani! Why won't anyone believe me?" Rahne said emphatically  
  
"Because, one, you then told me that you deserved what happened to you and two, you were lying. You're lying now. It's something you don't do very well, remember? You can't even keep your story straight. You don't just forget torture, though you may think you do. It's called denial and it sure as hell isn't healthy."  
  
"Why the bloody hell do I have tae tell ye what happened tae me? Why cannae ye jus' leave it be!" Rahne all but screamed.  
  
"Because like I explained, you can't be expected to cope with what happened to you on your own, and you don't have too." Dani said. With an amazing amount of willpower, Dani said, "While you were a prisoner on that island, you were raped, weren't you?"  
  
It was more a statement of fact than a question. Rahne's heart stopped for a moment and a look of fear, shock and shame came across her face when Dani said that. Dani could almost feel it when Rahne's heart started pounding again.  
  
"That's...silly, Dani. They did...a lot o' things t' me...but nae..." Rahne couldn't bring herself to finish her sentence. Her eyes started to water, "I don' want ta talk aboot it. Yuir wrong, Dani. You. Are. Wrong. They dinnae rape me."  
  
"You're lying to me again, Rahne. If they didn't rape you, why did you freak out when Kurt touched you? Why do you hate to be touched by anyone? Why don't you want to talk to any of your male friends? Why did you just scrub yourself so hard that you left red marks? Those are all post rape symptoms! Now tell me what happened while you were a prisoner, please!"  
  
Rahne looked away, unable to look Dani in the eyes and not for the first time,  
  
"Please, Rahne, whatever happened, I won't think any less of you, and you know that. I love you and just want to help you. But I can't do that if you won't tell me what happened. I'm begging you Rahne, tell me what happened."  
  
Rahne took moment to control her emotions, and started to recount what had happened to her shortly after she was captured...  
  
"If ye must know..."  
  
***  
  
"Whatever ye dae tae me an' the others, the X-Men will make ye regret it!" Rahne shouted defiantly. When they first captured her, they had foolishly held her with the other superhuman prisoners before they moved her, where she met had Kyle Dibney, A.K.A Wild Child. He had prevented Feral from trying to rip Rahne's throat out. Of course, Rahne could have wiped the floor with Feral, she'd done it before after all, but it wouldn't have been very productive. While they were gathered in the cell, John Calvin appeared over a holographic message to thank them for helping the cause of medical science and gave some high and mighty speech about how the goods of the many came before the good of the few. Of course, they all resolved to work together to break out after they heard that line. As they were waiting for the guard shift, Wolfsbane made small talk with Wild Child, catching up on what had happened with X-Factor after she had left the team. Rahne learned that Kyle had just regained his humanity before he was captured, and was uncertain if he was still human anymore. Rahne related her own stories of self-loathing and how she had overcome her own fear, which helped him a lot. Their plans to escape, however, were not to be. They had flooded the cell with knock out gas in preparation to moving them into their individual cells. Only Rahne, who expected that tactic and could hold her breath longer, was still conscience when they came in. She managed to tag some of the guards, but the tasers the guards used combined with the gas took her out before she could make any real progress.  
  
The fact that Rahne was still very depressed over the death of her mother did nothing to hinder her resistance. She still fought her captors with all her strength every chance she got. In her first day as a prisoner, she had already disabled three more guards before she was thrown in her own personal cell. Rather than waste her strength on the bars that she knew could withstand her strength, she lay down on the cot they provide and tried to think of a way to escape and get help. They let her stew for a little bit before two guards came to collect her.  
  
"Get up, mutie. You're coming with us." The man said lecherously  
  
"Ye better have somethin' tae back that up, because I'm nae aboot tae go anywhere with ye." With a thought, Rahne changed into her wolf form and flashed her claws. These men didn't scare Wolfsbane in the slightest.  
  
Without replying, one of the guards pulled out a dart gun and shot Rahne in the thigh with it. The dart barely broke the skin and Rahne quickly pulled it out, but it was too late. Her brown fur and claws disappeared back into her body and she couldn't 'feel' her powers anymore.  
  
"That drug effectively turns your powers off for two days. Now, if I have to come in there, I'll be very unhappy. And you don't want that."  
  
Swallowing her pride, Rahne walked out of her cell peacefully. The two guards led her thru the complex to what seemed like a cafeteria filled with at least three-dozen men.  
  
"The entertainments here, boys! Gather 'round!" The first guard shouted.  
  
"Entertainment? What...what are ye talking aboot?" Rahne still hadn't realized their intentions yet, but she was afraid all the same. One of the other men, who Rahne guessed was the leader, stepped forward. He was tall with a heavy set and an unshaved face wearing imitation military fatigues. Normally, the sight of such a man wouldn't scare Rahne in the least, but at the moment, she was nothing more than a powerless eighteen year-old girl.  
  
"Name's Jack. Me and the boys haven't had any fun in a while, what with being cooped on this island for so long, so the bosses decided that we could have a little fun with the patients before they cut them up. Seeing as how you're the best lookin' of the bunch, you've been elected."  
  
Rahne suddenly realized what they wanted and she started to struggle with all her strength. The two guards, however, easily restrained her. Jack walked up to Rahne and punched her hard in the stomach, driving the air out of her lungs. Rahne dropped to the floor on her knees, barely able to breath or see.  
  
"Knock it off, bitch. You're not impressing anyone." He said. The other two guards let go of Rahne and he pushed her down on her back. Rahne was in too much agony to resist as he ripped her shirt off and yanked her pants down around her ankles. Rahne tried to resist, but two other men took her wrists and stood on them. Jack took out a cigarette and lit it, waiting for Rahne to regain her wits.  
  
"Don', please don't ...anythin' but that..." Rahne begged as she gasped for air. Jack just smiled in response.  
  
"You should be flattered, girl. You get the attentions of all these men just for you!" Jack smiled as he unbuckled his pants. Rahne closed her eyes and looked away as he approached her. Rahne promised herself that she wouldn't scream as she felt him enter her, and ruthlessly tore thru her maidenhead. Horrible pain from between her legs shot thru her body as he cruelly took her virginity, her innocence. Deciding that raping her wasn't enough, Jack took the cigarette and held just barely over Rahne's left breast, so that she could feel the heat but wasn't burned.  
  
"Open your eyes and look, you little bitch, or I'll burn you." He threatened. Rahne, too afraid to disobey him, did as she was told. Jack looked into her tear filled eyes, smiling and very pleased with himself. "See? That's not so bad is it? You're even starting to enjoy it, aren't you, you little slut? This slut is wet already!"  
  
The other men started to cheer and laugh at the comment. Rahne didn't respond. She just wanted to die, to be taken away from all this pain and humiliation. Rahne couldn't tell how long Jack grinded himself against her body, her first rape was just a blur of pain and degradation. She finally felt him shutter in climax, and as he stood up, he kicked her hard in the ribs, almost breaking them.  
  
"Homo superior, huh? Sure don't seem so superior to me!" He sneered as Rahne lay on her side, her vision swimming from the pain and degradation. That comment brought even more cheers as another man replaced Jack inside of her. And then another. And another. Rahne had little idea about how many men had violated her, even though they made her watch every one of her rapes, beating her if she closed her eyes or cried too hard. One man made her sing 'I'm dreaming of a white Christmas', while another made her pretend that she was enjoying herself by yelling how he was a sex god and that she was thankful that he had taken her. But after a while, all the men just blended into one man, continually abusing and humiliating her.  
  
When they were finally done with her, they forced her to clean up the room she had been violated in, 'for fun'. They forced her to clean the room on her hands and knees nude, using her ripped T-shirt and jeans that her mother had given her for her birthday as rags, all the while leering at her body. By the time they dragged her back to her cell to recover, she had recovered her powers but she never used the chance to use them to escape. Rahne never resisted them again after that, even after they started their painful experiments on her.  
  
***  
  
Dani was horrified, to say the least, as Rahne described what had happened to her, and by the fact that Rahne, for the most part, seemed quite calm about describing it. But only on the surface.  
  
"Why the hell do you think that you deserved to be raped, Rahne? You were a victim!"  
  
"Because_I_enjoyed_it! They treated me like a whore... an' I liked it!"  
  
"What the hell are you talking about, Rahne?"  
  
"While they their way wit' me, muh body...reacted...I was... aroused, like some slut! A whore... like...like Craig always said I was! He was right aboot me!" She replied. Rahne started to shake slightly and tears were forming in her eyes...  
  
With anyone else, Dani would have been fighting the urge to smack them upside the head and yell at them for thinking something so foolish, so stupid, but Dani understood Rahne in a way few others did, "Rahne, you're the innocent victim of a horrible crime, and nothing more! Your body is like a machine, and it will always, always react to stimulus, regardless of consent!"  
  
"But...I..."  
  
"If you're cut and you bleed, does that mean you want to bleed?"  
  
"O'... course nae, but I..."  
  
"If you're cold, you shiver, right?" Dani said quickly  
  
"Yes...but..."  
  
"And if you're hot, Rahne, you sweat! And as a woman, your body will always react a certain way during sex, regardless of consent or pleasure! I know you're not an expert on sex, but you've worked with one of the best doctors in the world, you know it's true!" Dani pulled Rahne close to comfort her, and held her tight as Rahne started to tremble even more, tears flowing more freely now.  
  
"I know the lies Craig filled your mind with when you were growing up. He told you that women who were raped were asking for it, didn't he?" Dani asked, though she already knew the answer, "That they somehow, in someway, deserved it, because of how they acted or dressed."  
  
"Aye." Rahne confirmed, "He... once said that... a woman who was... raped... brought... it on herself...because o' how...she...she...acted...or dressed... that...she was...t' blame...always..."  
  
"And he was wrong, Rahne." Dani growled, without really meaning to, "Just like he was wrong about you being a devilspawn, and just like he was wrong about all mutants being evil. You never once gave them consent, Rahne. You know that, so don't blame yourself for what your body did, please! They took the ultimate expression of love between a man and woman and twisted it to hurt you, but it. wasn't. your. fault!"  
  
"I... always hoped... muh... f...f...first time... would be ...wit'...with someone I loved... an' who... loved me," Rahne sobbed.  
  
"I know, Rahne, I know. I'm so sorry."  
  
"I shid have...have... fought them harder," Rahne choked, "I...jus' dinnae want... tae be hurt like...like...that... again. I was ...so weak..."  
  
"You weren't weak, Rahne. You did what you had to too survive, and that's what's truly important. You...you haven't cried about what happened to you, have you? About how they hurt you." Dani asked, though she already knew the answer.  
  
Rahne was visibly quacking by now, with tears running down her face and Dani could sense that Rahne was just barely holding back the floodgates of her pain. Rahne started to look away, unable to face her friend, but Dani put her hand under Rahne's chin and gently brought Rahne back face to face with her.  
  
"Have you?" Dani asked again  
  
"A... wee bit. I've tried ...s...s... so verra hard... not tae," Rahne stammered, her voice growing weaker with each and every word, "I'm afraid... that... if I start, I... don' think that... I'd be able... t' stop..."  
  
"Try, Rahne. Stop blaming your self for what happened, because it wasn't your fault. You never asked to be raped, and you sure as hell didn't, couldn't deserve it. Just let it go."  
  
And she did. Rahne stopped repressing all the pain, shame and anguish that she had holding down for so very, very long. Dani comforted her as best she could as Rahne buried her face in Dani's chest, sobbing violently as she clung to Dani for comfort.  
  
"I'msosorryI'msosorryI'msosorry," Rahne said hysterically as she cried in her friend's arms, "Ithoughtyewouldthinklesso'meorbemadatme...f'r...f'r..."  
  
"Ssshhh...It's okay now, Rahne, it's okay sweet heart. You have nothing to apologize for. I understand, and I could never think less of you because you were raped." Dani said as she herself fought back her tears for Rahne and gently rocked the weeping Rahne back and forth.  
  
"You have to be strong for her, You have to be strong for her," Dani repeated to herself again and again.  
  
"It's...jus'... nae... fair! I've tried...all muh life...tae live...muh life...like... the good book...says! So what... did...I e'er do... t' deserve... somethin' like this?"  
  
"Not a damn thing, Rahne. Not a goddamn thing. " Dani replied, without a moment's hesitation. 


	7. Breakdowns

Chapter 7 Breakdowns  
  
" I never knew how much stuff we kept in here." Jean Grey said to no one in particular. She had set about cleaning out the spare bedroom in the guesthouse so that they could move Rahne in, but she hadn't realized what a chore it was. The room was filled with boxes, with god only knows what inside of them. Out of curiosity, Jean opened one box marked old stuff. She pulled out her old yellow and black costume that she first wore as an X-man and held it in front of herself.  
  
" I can't believe I used to fit into this thing." She sighed.  
  
" You should see my wardrobe, my dear Jean. I can't tell you how hard it is to find something made for today's discriminating four hundred pound blue furred mutant!"  
  
" Is that why you used to fight menaces to mutant kind in a pair of underwear, Hank?"  
  
" No, it just made doing the laundry far more easy. I shed like you wouldn't believe!"  
  
" Oh, you'd be surprised Hank. I lived with you for a while now. Heck, you left enough hair around to make a throw rug! How's it coming with those scramblers? Have they been installed yet?"  
  
" They've all been placed, prepped and ready to go. We should do a test run on their effectiveness, post haste."  
  
" Alright. Turn them on so I can test them."  
  
Hank did, and Jean reached out with her telepathy. Normally, Jean could hear the voices of hundreds with her telepathy. Though she had learned to block it out the voices, it was still there, a constant white noise. But now there was nothing, utter silence with the exception of Hank, whom she could still 'hear'. And she heard something curious.  
  
" Hank, please forgive my unintentional prying, but why are you so anxious to get back to your lab, and why don't you want Rahne or anyone else to know what you're doing?"  
  
" Uhh, I'm working on a exercise program, that combined with some diet supplements will help Rahne regain the strength in her legs quicker. It's still in the design stages, so I don't want to get her hopes up, without due cause."  
  
" Oh. Well, at least with Rahne staying here, she won't be bothering our telepathically inclined students with her nightmares."  
  
" Yes, Jean, but she will be bothering you with her dreams, you realize. The scramblers only close off an area. You may and most likely will still be affected, Jean."  
  
" I know. And I'm willing to risk it."  
  
" I see. May I ask why?"  
  
" Why what?"  
  
" Why are you going to such lengths for Rahne? We all care for her well being, but with you, it's more."  
  
" I don't know what you're talking about, Hank."  
  
" Come now, Jean. I know you far better than that. You visited Rahne daily while she was in a coma and prodded me and Cecelia for updates on her condition almost as much as Dani. Your compassion is well known, to be sure, but it seems to me that this is more."  
  
"It just needs to be done." Jean said defensively.  
  
" True, that it does. That it does. That it does indeed."  
  
***  
  
After what seemed to be two eternities, Rahne fell asleep weeping in Dani's arms. Dani gently laid Rahne back in bed, pulled the sheets over her and called for Cecelia.  
  
" You were right. Damn it all to hel, you. were right." She sighed. Dani struggled to maintain her composure. She loved Rahne like the little sister she never had and it was difficult enough knowing that she had been horribly tortured for months on end, but knowing that Rahne had been raped for a fact, on top of everything else, was almost too much for her. Dani didn't want to believe it at first, and even then she had trouble dealing with it. Now.She knew that she had to be strong for Rahne, but it was so very hard now.  
  
"At least she stopped blaming herself and internalizing her pain now, which is the first step to recovery, Dani." Cecelia walked over to a medicine cabinet and pulled out a syringe. " This should help her rest."  
  
" What. what about any. S.T.D's? According to Rahne, there.there were.so many." Dani stammered. The very question was almost impossible for her to ask.  
  
"None, thankfully. We checked her for everything when she was brought in, and it was about the only thing that didn't show up."  
  
-Thank the Spirits for small miracles-Dani thought to herself as she absently ran her hand over Rahne's cheek. "I need to do something at the danger room, real quick. Do you think that you could watch her for a little bit?"  
  
Cecelia gave Dani an odd look. Normally, Dani insisted on being by Rahne's side whenever she could, leaving only for food or to use the bathroom and even then leaving reluctantly. Why would she leave now?  
  
"I gave her Ambein, it'll knock her out for a while. She doesn't need anyone here with her, and I have other duties I need to see to."  
  
" Are you sure you can't stay here with her?"  
  
" Sorry, Dani. But I'm sure Rahne will be just fine alone."  
  
"Alright, for now."  
  
As Cecelia walked out of the room with Dani, she couldn't help but wonder what would drag her away from Rahne. When Cecelia was out of sight, Dani sprinted towards the danger room. She didn't want to waste any more time than she had too. Much to her chagrin, she found that it was in use. She opened the door and saw that three students were lying around on a simulated beach. One student resembled a bird, his arms covered in feathers; another was a female with four eyes and three arms while the last looked like a human turtle. Dani turned the simulation off, and the three students who had sitting in beach chairs relaxing suddenly found themselves sitting in a cold, metal room.  
  
" Hey, what's the big idea?" The birdboy asked.  
  
" I need to use the danger room. You don't. Out." Dani replied.  
  
" But the professor said we could relax here!"  
  
" Hey, you're one of the senior classes, aren't you? What's it like to graduate?"  
  
" Great. Now get out."  
  
Not really catching the hostility in her voice, the students kept asking her questions about the school.  
  
" What's the highest level you've reached in the danger room?"  
  
" Have you ever piloted the black bird?"  
  
" What are they keeping in the medi-lab?"  
  
Enraged at that last comment and at being ignored, Dani sucker punched the bird boy, knocking him to his ass.  
  
" Maybe you three didn't hear me the first time I said it, so I'll say it again, get the hell out!"  
  
The three students rushed out of the room, rightfully afraid of what she would do to them if they stayed.  
  
" Computer, seal the danger room, program alpha beta Sunspot is gay."  
  
In seconds, the danger room sealed itself completely off. Dani started a program designed by the late New Mutant Douglas Ramsey, A.K.A Cypher. After the New Mutants had been attacked by the Beyonder, a powerful alien, Dan thought it was best to have a 'safe house' that the New Mutants would be protected in. The danger room was a natural choice, and she had Cypher create a program to make it into the safest place on earth, completely sealed off from the rest of the mansion if need be. No one could get in or out now unless they knew the proper access codes, something only she and the now deceased Cypher knew.  
  
-Suck it up. You need to see this. You need to know- Dani thought to herself. Like all of Xavier's students, Danielle Moonstar was a mutant. One of her powers was to create solid illusions of what someone feared most. It was a power that she refined over the years, and she now had the skill of a surgeon using it. While she was comforting Rahne, Dani pulled the image of the room Rahne had been held in and experimented on out of her mind. She didn't project it then and there, of course; rather Dani 'held on' to it and waited until she had some time alone. Dani called on her power now, and the danger room changed from a soulless metal room, to a sterile surgical room filled with all kinds of medical instruments and medicine bottles. Dani looked them over, and could read the contents and the amount of 'bottles'. Dani opened one of the cabinets and saw even more medical supplies, all properly placed and labeled. She opened another cabinet and saw the exact same thing.  
  
The snap was almost audible. "Bastards!" Dani screamed as she ripped the cabinets from the wall.  
  
" She was an innocent! And you sons of bitches took that from her!"  
  
" Why! What the hell did she ever do to deserve this!? Because she was a mutant?!"  
  
Dani tore another cabinet off the wall and smashed it to the ground,  
  
" Because she had one fucking thing you wanted, and you had to rip everything else away from her to get it!!!"  
  
After a few minutes of destroying the faux room, Dani put her face in her hands, slumped to the floor and wept for Rahne.  
  
"It's appalling in it's accuracy, isn't it?"  
  
Dani looked up; surprised that anyone else could be in the danger room with her. She was even more shocked that it was Professor X, who had no real physical powers whatsoever.  
  
" How the hell."  
  
" I designed the danger room myself, Dani, remember? If it will recognize the commands of no one else, it will recognize mine. So, this is where they kept Rahne?"  
  
"I knew she remembered almost everything that happened to her, but I never expected.this." Dani said. Xavier knew instantly what she meant.  
  
" Every detail, every little thing, every_little_nuance_of_this_god_damned_room is_engrained_in_her_mind!" Dani screamed, " Every time she closes her eyes, she sees this fucking room! And I don't know how the hell to help her overcome what they did to her!"  
  
" You could start by calming down. You've been on edge ever since you found out what happened to Rahne, and it's not helping anyone. You've always been passionate, Dani, but here it's working against you."  
  
" Do you even know what it's like!?! Do you? My best, closest friend has been brutalized, in ways that may never heal, and I can't do anything at all to help her! I may as well be pissing in the wind!" Dani snapped.  
  
" I know exactly what it's like, Dani. Sadly enough, I went thru the something very similar with Rahne's mother."  
  
" Moira?"  
  
" Yes. What I tell you next, I expect to be kept in confidentiality."  
  
Dani nodded, " Of course."  
  
"Moira married an abusive man, and in time she began to realize that he would never change. She eventually decided to leave him and decided to tell him while they were visiting New York on a vacation. He responded by brutally sexually assaulting her, taking her passport and leaving her beaten half to death in her hotel room. She was fortunate enough that a maid cleaning the rooms found her before she bled to death from internal hemorrhaging and called for an ambulance. Besides the incredible pain Joe inflicted on her both physically and mentally, he also left her pregnant from the attack."  
  
" You mean Proteus was. Oh my god.I never knew."  
  
" I doubt that Moira ever told anyone, perhaps not even Rahne. She called me from the hospital, since I was the only one she trusted enough at the time. I helped her as best as I could, but."  
  
" But?"  
  
" But I wasted far to much time being enraged at her husband, Joe." Xavier sighed, " I spent more time convincing myself not to kill him with my powers than helping Moira overcome what happened to her. My 'righteous' anger prevented me from giving her the love, comfort and support she so desperately needed from me. In short, I failed her, and her unborn child, in her time of greatest need. And I see you making the exact same mistakes I made. Rahne is far stronger than you give her credit for, Dani. It's a quiet strength, to be sure, but it's most certainly there. She overcame the lies, abuse and self-loathing that Craig instilled her mind with as a child, and with yours and Jean's help, she can overcome this as well. But not if those who are trying to help her recover are snapping under the pressure and assaulting students and teachers."  
  
Dani sighed. He was right. It was hard to admit, but at the pace she was going, Dani knew she would burn out emotionally soon, and wouldn't be of any use to anyone, especially Rahne.  
  
" What do you think I should do? How can I help her?"  
  
" I think you should take a day away from Rahne. To calm down and collect yourself. I would suggest that you also use the time to withdraw from college, at least for this semester."  
  
" What? I can't leave her now! I don't give a damn about my classes!"  
  
" I know you mean well, but this entire situation is simply draining you dry emotionally. It's just one day, Dani. At most. Jean is more than willing to stay with Rahne while you sort out what you need to."  
  
" Rahne."  
  
" I'm certain Jean will be able to help her while you see to what you need to. Rahne is going to need your strength now more than ever before. Do you honestly think you can bear that burden alone now, or are even in good enough condition now to help her? I certainly don't."  
  
" Okay, okay. You're right; I do need to withdraw and get my stuff out of my dorm, and now is a good as time as any. Where's.where's Jean now?"  
  
" She's already with Rahne. Logan's in the garage ready to drive you to New York." 


	8. Sweet Dreams are made

Chapter 8 Sweet Dreams are made  
  
Despite the fact that Cecelia had given Rahne a strong sedative that was supposed to prevent dreams, Jean Grey could still feel Rahne's pain, her nightmares as the young girl slept. They were far less pronounced, and certainly not enough to affect any of the telepathic students by any means, but they were there all the same. And Jean simply couldn't stand it anymore.  
  
- After what she's suffered thru, she deserves at least one pleasant night- Jean thought to herself. She thought about the moral implications of what she intended to do for a moment, but decided in the end that helping Rahne took precedence over some abstract ideals. This time, at least. She used her telepathy and reached into Rahne's mind. Unlike with Frost, Rahne's mind didn't attempt to eject or resist Jean. For one thing, Jean was the person who brought Rahne back from the brink of death when they first rescued her. In doing so, Rahne's unconscious mind 'trusted' Jean, as opposed to Frost who had attempted to brainwash Rahne before. For another thing, Jean was far more gentle than Frost when she attempted to enter Rahne's mind, gently coaxing her way in, rather than forcing herself in. She didn't bother to look around as she entered Rahne's nightmare. It was just Rahne's mental recreation of the torture she had suffered, and Jean had already seen it first hand. Using her powers, she dispelled it completely.  
  
-I'll have to 'bring up' some of her happier memories if I want her to have a good night's sleep-Jean thought to herself. She reached out with her powers and 'called' forth memories from Rahne's mind that she had a pleasant and positive emotional attachment to. Jean was shocked to find that Rahne had so relatively few. Her earliest memories were of abuse, both physical and emotional by the Reverend Craig, who raised her until she was a teenager and filled her mind with self-loathing. Jean found that Rahne's life was one of constant struggle, from reconciling her faith with her powers to learning that the only family she had was dying of an incurable disease, and that she had never given up or stopped believing in the goodness of man. Jean put aside her sympathy for Rahne for a moment and created a dream for Rahne, where she was having a picnic with her old friends from the New Mutants. But the moment she stopped concentrating on it, Rahne's dream degenerated back into the horrific nightmare she was having before.  
  
-The trauma's so deep, it's hard to dispel. It's going to take some effort to get Rahne's mind to 'accept' the dream I made for her.- Jean thought to herself, -Well, I knew this wouldn't be easy when I started-. She concentrated, and went about reconstructing the pleasant dream she had created for Rahne.  
  
***  
  
Dani squirmed uncomfortably in her seat, "Why couldn't we have taken the Black Bird instead?"  
  
"We're just going to pick up a few things out of your dorm, Dani. This van will do that just fine. Just sit back and enjoy the ride." Logan replied.  
  
"Couldn't we just go a little faster?"  
  
"There's something called the speed limit, Moonstar, and I'm already a good ten miles over it. Unclench, willya? You might pass a diamond you keep this up. I know you're concerned about Rahne, but Jeanie will take good care of her. The whole point of this trip is so you can cool down some, remember?"  
  
"Easier said that done, really. Rahne brings out the mother in me, even after all these years. Logan... I have to ask you something, did you know?"  
  
"Know what?"  
  
"You know exactly what I'm talking about, Logan."  
  
"I did know that Rahne was raped? I suspected she was, yeah."  
  
"So why didn't you tell me?" Dani asked, trying very hard not to sound accusing.  
  
"'Cause I really, really hoped that I was wrong. I didn't want to think that they did something even worse to that poor kid than cut her up like a turkey at Thanksgiving. That's why I didn't tell you, and I'm sorry I didn't. But again, isn't the point of this trip to be for you to stop worrying about Rahne? At least for ten freakin' minutes."  
  
"I know, Logan, I know," Dani pressed the recline button on her seat and leaned back, "If you wouldn't mind talking about it, what helped you overcome what Weapon X did to you?"  
  
Logan bristled a little bit. He normally didn't like to talk about his 'dark time', but it wasn't something he was afraid to talk about either, when he had too, that is.  
  
"Don't know how much it will help ya' really, but sure. The kindness of strangers really. When Mac and Heather found me in the woods, I was completely out of it. I attacked them for no good reason really, but they managed to take me out. They would have been within their rights to put me down right then and there, but they didn't. They brought me back to their cabin and, luckily, managed to reach my humanity. Rahne just needs someone to help her thru this, a shoulder to cry on. You and Jean will do fine."  
  
"I hope."  
  
"Let's talk about somethin' else, okay? Something half way pleasant, at least."  
  
"Alright. So... how exactly did X-Stacy or whatever become an X-man? Did you guys forget about the half dozen mutants that you already trained? I'm sure any member of Generation X would make a better choice than some mutant prostitute. I mean, I'm sure Husk, Siryn or Sunspot would have worked in a jam!"  
  
"Well, she did alright against the Church of Humanity... and we were short handed at the time," Logan shrugged  
  
"Yeah, so? You could have called me, or Jubilee or someone! Come on!"  
  
"Promise not to tell?"  
  
"Tell what?"  
  
"Promise not to tell?" Wolverine asked again.  
  
"Sure. I promise."  
  
"Bobby bribed me into talking the others into letting her join." Wolverine confessed  
  
"Iceman? I thought he was gay?"  
  
"May as well be, what with his luck and all," Logan muttered under his breath, "Nah, He's just desperate. Really, really desperate. He promised to buy all my Cubans for a year and clean my bike whenever I needed it for the next six months. He made me promise not to tell, too."  
  
"So how exactly did you talk the others into letting her in?"  
  
"I just told them about the deal I made with Bobby!" Logan smirked, "I had my toes crossed!" They both enjoyed a good, long laugh at that; the first one Dani had really had since she learned what had happened to Rahne.  
  
***  
  
It was around five o clock in the morning when Jean felt Rahne begin to stir. As Jean had spent the better part of the night creating and recreating a pleasant dream for Rahne, she was a little relieved. It was hard work, after all. Jean nudged Rahne on the shoulder to fully wake her.  
  
"Rahne, I need your attention for a moment, sweetie. I need to tell you something."  
  
Rahne opened her eyes, attentive but silent.  
  
"I'm going to move you out of here and into a bedroom in the guest house. I think you'll like it there better."  
  
"I thought that ye an' Scott lived there. I...I don' want tae be a burden on anyone." Rahne said softly.  
  
-I can't believe she's still able to think about others after what's happened to her- Jean thought to herself, "You're not a burden on anyone, Rahne, and you won't be. I just think that you'll be more comfortable there than you are here."  
  
"But, I don' think that I'm strong enough tae walk right now..."  
  
"That's not a problem, Rahne. You just relax and let me do all the work, okay?"  
  
Jean used her telekinetic powers to lift Rahne slightly in the air and wrapped Rahne carefully in her blanket to keep her warm. Jean then picked her up, holding her in her arms like a mother might carry a young child. Once they were outside, Rahne tapped Jean gently on the shoulder to get her to stop.  
  
"Is anything wrong, Rahne?"  
  
"Ah don' mean tae be a bother, but... ken I see... the sun rise? I... havenae seen it... in so long..."  
  
"Of course, Rahne. I think I can even give you an even better view." Jean said. She took to the air with Rahne and hovered over the mansion. As the sun came out over the horizon, Rahne, for the first time in a long time, shed a tear of joy. For her, the sunrise drove home the fact that she was free, finally free, if only physically. Free from the labs, from the pain, free from the living hell she had been thru for the last three months. To tell the truth, Rahne never expected to see it again after she had been captured, and so it was easily the most beautiful thing she had ever seen.  
  
"Thank ye so, so verra much." She said softly  
  
"Any time, Rahne." Jean smiled, "Why don't we get you to your room so you can get some more rest?"  
  
"All right."  
  
Jean took Rahne to her room and carefully laid her down in the queen-sized bed. Jean decided not to tell Rahne that the bed had been hers and Scott's before they had decided to move Rahne in. Jean carefully placed Rahne on her back in bed and placed two pillows under her legs to elevate them and improve circulation. She then pulled the comforters over Rahne.  
  
"I'll be back in a few hours with your breakfast, okay Rahne?"  
  
Rahne didn't respond, she was already fast asleep. Jean scanned her telepathically and was pleased to find that Rahne's sleep was peaceful. Jean tucked her in and left. She almost turned the lights off before she caught herself.  
  
-She's deathly afraid of the dark now, remember?- Jean chided herself. Jean went to hers and Scott's room (Scott was away on a mission) to try to catch a few hours of sleep before she had to get up and make breakfast for Rahne. She programmed the alarm clock to wake her up in about an hour and laid down in bed. She blinked, and heard the alarm go off.  
  
-Already!?- Jean sighed. As she pulled herself up, she crushed the alarm clock into a little ball with her telekinesis. It was annoying, and every X- Man had a spare alarm clock in case they destroyed their's.  
  
***  
  
Some people were, by nature, morning people. Cecelia Reyes was one of those people. She was awake by five thirty in the morning and fully awake at six. And so, she went about making the coffee for the schoolteachers and making her breakfast.  
  
"I hate you, Cecelia Reyes. You have no right to look so well rested this early in the morning."  
  
Cecelia turned and saw Jean Grey, who looked very, very tired, "Eh, what can I say? I used to always work the morning shift. Want some coffee, Jean?"  
  
"For the love of god, yes."  
  
"I noticed that you moved Rahne this morning. Why didn't you move her last night when she was asleep?" Cecelia asked as she handed Jean a cup of coffee. Jean took a long gulp, and sat silent for a moment.  
  
"I just didn't want Rahne to wake up in an unfamiliar room all of a sudden. I don't want to think about how she would have taken it."  
  
"I don't mean to pry, but why are you going to such lengths for Rahne? You didn't know her all that well before this happened, after all."  
  
"I've had some time to think about that, last night. A lot of reasons, I suppose. Moira was a very good friend, to both the X-men and me. I know she would want us to look after her daughter for her in her place. Given everything Moira did for us, I think it's the least we can do. Rahne was also an early student of the professor's in the New Mutants, and we always look after our own. But the main reason, well, have I ever told you about mine and Scott's twenty two year old daughter, Rachel?"  
  
Cecelia nearly choked on her coffee, and took a few seconds to catch her breath. Jean just smiled and wished she had a camera to record the look on Cecelia's face, it was truly priceless.  
  
"Uhh, Jean, I'm your doctor, and I can say for a fact that you've never given birth. And for you to have a twenty two year old daughter...that would be physically impossible considering your age! What on earth are you talking about?"  
  
"True, I never have given birth. Although me and Scott have four biological children, all of whom are now grown adults." Jean took another sip of her coffee while Cecelia just stood there, looking completely bewildered.  
  
"It's a long story, so I'll try to summarize it as best I can."  
  
"Just about your daughter, though. I don't know if I want to hear about all your other kids you have running around, my head just might explode."  
  
"Alright. You know what alternate future realties are, right?" As she started to explain, she reached out with her powers and took out a box of pancake mix from the cabinets and the milk from the fridge.  
  
"Hank has told me something about them. A future that might be, but isn't guaranteed to come to pass, right?"  
  
"Right. Rachel came from a reality where...she had a... traumatic upbringing before she escaped to our time." Jean decided against telling Cecelia how Rachel was forced to hunt down and kill other mutants. Mainly because Rachel never liked to tell anyone about it herself and Jean wanted to honor that, but also Jean was still ashamed of how she had treated her, "When I first met her, for mainly selfish reasons, looking in retrospect, I rejected her in every way a person, a mother could. It wasn't pretty. We eventually reconciled, but before I could really get to know her, she was gone."  
  
"How did she die?"  
  
"She, well...it's... complicated. I guess long story short, Rahne just reminds me so much of Rachel. A young woman in incredible pain who needs someone. And I don't want to fail another young woman in need again." By now, Jean had already made the pan cake mix while talking to Cecelia. She turned an eye on, placed a skillet on the eye and poured the batter in, "And like I told Hank, it needs to be done."  
  
***  
  
When Jean's alarm clock went off, it not only awoke Jean, but it woke Rahne was well. But Rahne didn't mind it in the least. She had spent enough time asleep already as far as she was concerned. And she felt a lot better emotionally after her 'confession' to Dani.  
  
-I shouldnae blamed muhself for what they did t' me- She sighed. It was foolish and irrational, looking back. In truth, it wasn't a conclusion she came to immediately. Her rape and her body's subsequent betrayal had left her hurt and confused, to say the least. That pain was then combined with her grief over the death of her mother, which was made even worse by the daily torture and humiliation she suffered at the hands of the guards and doctors. She needed someone, anyone to blame for her pain and suffering. Rahne recognized now blaming herself was just an complicated case of stockholms, where a victim identifies with their captor. And like Reverend Craig, her foster father had taught her so long ago, she was to blame. Because she was touched by the devil, a demon, and the daughter of a whore.  
  
-I wonder how he would react if he learned his former ward was cut up like a prize steer of the sakes o' humans everywhere- She thought bitterly. Craig would always go on about how mutants were demons and that they needed to be wiped off the face of the earth for the sake of all god-fearing men. In fact, Reverend Craig went so far as to trying to lynch his ward immediately after she manifested her mutant ability to transform into a red wolf. Had it not been for Moira MacTaggert, Rahne's foster mother, he would have killed her without a second thought.  
  
-Well, he's ruined muh life enough, and he's nae aboot tae do me anymore harm- She thought to herself. Rather than brood about what had happened to her, something she couldn't change, Rahne decided to see what she could still do. She knew that the damage done to her body was pretty extensive, but she was hopeful. She felt stronger now, far stronger than when she had been before, when depression was completely overtaking her. She attempted to lift her legs off the pillows, but couldn't get them more than six inches into the air before the effort became too much.  
  
-I'm as weak as a newborn babe now- she thought to herself. Half of her knew that she would physically never be the same. She had worked alongside the best doctors in the world as Moira's lab assistant, after all, and she had learned a thing or two about the body. But half of her strongly refused to believe she would never fully recover. Not after the life she had led, the adventures she's had.  
  
-I've gone toe t' toe with the demons o' hell, the M.L.F, Hell's Belles and all kinds o' scum. Who am I supposed t' go from that...- Rahne tried and failed to lift her legs two more inches off the pillow, -...t' this?-  
  
***  
  
When Jean brought Rahne her breakfast, she didn't bring Rahne just pancakes. She brought Rahne banana pancakes, eggs, bacon and a bowl of melon, as well as a glass of milk and orange juice. It was enough food to choke a horse and took some effort to prepare, but Jean didn't much care.  
  
-She can eat what wants, and that'll be fine-She thought to herself as she placed the food on a tray designed to let a person eat breakfast in bed. She walked out of the kitchen and took the food to Rahne. As she opened the door to Rahne's room, she could sense that Rahne was awake.  
  
"Hope you're hungry, Rahne, because I made the best breakfast I know how to make."  
  
"Ye shouldnae have, Jean. I'm nae all that hungry, really..."  
  
Jean set the tray down in front of Rahne, "It's alright dear. You just eat what you can and don't worry about the rest, okay? I'll be outside doing a little house keeping. Just 'call' me when you're done or if you need me, alright?"  
  
Jean left, and went to lie down on her bed while Rahne ate her breakfast, though she made sure not to fall asleep. After roughly forty minutes...  
  
*Jean? I've finished...*  
  
*I'll be right there, sweet heart*  
  
When Jean entered the room, she was surprised to find every last bit of food was gone from Rahne's tray. Jean could barely hide her astonishment.  
  
"Muh metabolism... is a little faster than most people's..." Rahne explained, a little embarrassed by the fact she had eaten so much in one sitting.  
  
"So I see." Jean said. She lifted the tray with her powers, taking it out of the room and setting it down in the kitchen without leaving the room.  
  
"I don' mean tae sound ungrateful, but where's Dani? She's always hoverin' aboot, frettin' aboot me..."  
  
"She had had some things she needed to take care of in New York. She should be back later tonight."  
  
"That's good. I've been placing such a weight on her shoulders, wit' muh problems an' all..."  
  
"Don't say that, Rahne. We're your friends, we care about you and you need our help right now. Sometimes, it's just that simple."  
  
"I... suppose."  
  
"Are you ready to talk about what happened?"  
  
"Nae really." Rahne admitted  
  
"Are you willing to talk about what happened?"  
  
"I...I think so..."  
  
Jean took Rahne's hand in hers gently and placed her other hand on Rahne's shoulder to comfort her, "I think you should try. We can stop whenever you like, but I think it would help a lot if you told me what happened."  
  
Rahne took a deep breath and a moment to collect herself, and began to describe the torture she suffered while she was held prisoner. Over the course of an hour, she described how the doctors would cut her stomach open to examine it's workings while she was awake. Rahne went on to describe how they pulled her fingernails out while she was in her human form, and then forced her to transform into her half wolf form, so they could do it all over again. Rahne explained why she was now afraid of water, because of how the doctors placed her in freezing cold water half a dozen times to induce hypothermia to, in their words 'better study it's effects on the body'. Rahne described how certain guards would touch her sex while masturbating in front of her. Apparently they found her bound and bloodied form an erotic sight. Rahne had barely described three weeks captivity before she couldn't continue anymore. Despite the painful emotions and memories she had drudged up, Rahne still felt as though she had a great weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Finally, someone, anyone knew how she suffered and cared... and Jean searched for something, anything, to say that would be comforting, reassuring and wouldn't sound cliché', but before she could say a word...  
  
"Why did I survive, Jean? Why did I live... when everyone else... they took... died?" Rahne sobbed, "Why do I ...always live... while everyone around me... dies?"  
  
"I don't have an answer for you, Rahne, I wish I did. But it isn't your fault that you survived and others didn't. You were lucky to survive yourself, Rahne. There was nothing you could have done for those other victims, you know that."  
  
"It's just that...isnae fair that I lived... when all those other poor souls died like they did! I could always hear the screams... of those the doctors were torturin', even thru the walls, even when I slept! I... ken still hear them now! It's jus' nae right...Maybe I shid have died with them..."  
  
"There was nothing, and I mean nothing that you could have done for the other victims of the labs, Rahne. You didn't kill them, and you couldn't have saved them. I know it's hard to accept, but sometimes you can't save everyone. Please, don't blame yourself for something you had no control over." Jean said forcefully.  
  
"It's just that...muh... I...why...why does god hate me... so... much?"  
  
"God doesn't hate you, Rahne. He just works in mysterious ways."  
  
"DON'T GIVE ME THAT! That's all anyone seems tae say about all the pain and suffering on earth!"  
  
Jean was taken back by the force of Rahne's statement, but not nearly as much as Rahne herself seemed to be...  
  
"I'm...I'm sorry fer snappin' at ye like that, Jean. It's just that... that's all I've e'er heard... whenever I ask why? Why does muh father hate me? Why was I orphaned twice before muh nineteenth birthday? An' I...am ...so... sick ...and... tired o' it!" Rahne choked.  
  
"I know sometimes it's hard to accept or believe, Rahne, but it's truer than you know. I admit that I'm no expert on theology, but I've seen enough to in life to convince me that god does indeed work in mysterious ways. When John Walsh's son was murdered, he started a program that has brought hundreds of criminals to justice and saved countless lives..."  
  
"On Fox, no less." Rahne remarked.  
  
"See my point?" Jean joked, trying to break the tension, "Who would have thought that one woman refusing to give up her seat on a bus would have sparked the civil rights movement? The events of September 11th have certainly helped bring this nation together, too. I'm sure Moira never expected to find "...the sweetest child in all of Scotland running from a mob of fools..." when she went for a walk all those years ago."  
  
"I guess. It's jus' that, they cut me up... like a...a lab rat and stripped me o' muh dignity as a woman, as a human bein'! They violated me... in any an' every way they could! They had no right to do what they did t' me! What good ken possibly come o' that?"  
  
Jean looked Rahne in the eyes, and cursed the fact that she wasn't a better liar, "I don't know, Rahne. I really don't. But that's not my concern. My concern is making you better and helping you heal. I don't care much about anything else other than that right now."  
  
"I don' think that I'll ever be the same again..." Rahne sobbed.  
  
Jean put her arm around Rahne's shoulder and gently pulled her closer,  
  
"But that doesn't mean you won't ever be better. I do believe, with all my heart, that the weight we carry on our shoulders can only make us stronger." 


	9. Two steps forward?

Chapter 9 Two Steps forward... 

As Dani awoke to a new day, she had to admit that her trip back to her dorm was a success. She felt renewed, both physically and emotionally, her batteries recharged as it were. And Dani felt more prepared than ever to go out and help her best friend reclaim her life now. Dani crawled out of bed and stretched a little. She looked out the window and could see from the position of the sun that it was just before noon.

"Man, I slept way to long." She thought to herself. Dani hurriedly changed out of the clothes she had been sleeping in and jumped into the shower. She washed off as quickly as she could, like she had been doing for over the last week, dressed as fast as she could and made a beeline to the medi-lab. Despite her newfound (relative) calm, Dani still didn't want to spend any more time away from Rahne than she had to.

"Thank god Jean was with Rahne yesterday. I know I needed to cool down, but I don't think Rahne needs to be alone right now." Dani thought as she hurried to the medi lab. She checked out the room Rahne had been staying in and found it empty. She was actually relieved that they had finally moved Rahne out of the medi-lab. Dani could sense how uncomfortable Rahne was there, but didn't really know what to do about it before they suggested Rahne move in with Jean. After all, Rahne seemed to hate a crowd now more than ever now, so moving her into a room upstairs in the mansion wasn't an option. Dani searched the lower levels for a few minutes before she found Rahne. She was sitting on an examination table, finishing up a check up with Cecelia. Dani noted that Rahne was wearing what appeared to be some old clothes that Jean had given her.

"...The scars on your back are completely gone now, but I'm afraid that the rest of your body has healed as much as it's going to." Cecelia explained, "On a high note, your body has responded pretty well to therapy and you've gotten use to using the crutches quickly..."

"I'm a survivor, it seems." Rahne said miserably, "Are...are ye sure that muh legs won't heal anymore? Or what aboot a transplant t' replace the damaged muscle? Mum use t' tell me aboot all the new techniques they've been devolpin'... "

"I'm afraid that the damage to the cartilage and muscle was simply too extensive in your knee ligaments and went untreated for too long, Rahne. And I don't think that you body wouldn't accept a cartridge transplant due to your...unique physiology. I'm sorry."

"What about her wolf form?" Dani asked as she entered the room, "It's far stronger than her normal form, how was it affected?"

"It's hard to say, really. But there's one way to find out. Rahne, are you strong enough now to transform?" the doctor asked, "According to Hank, your transformation won't do any permanent damage to your body now."

"Aye. Muh powers feel like they're back now." Rahne said. She closed her eyes and concentrated, 'calling' forth her change form. Normally, it felt like warm water flowing over and out of her body, not the least bit uncomfortable. Now, it felt like her muscles were on fire and trying to tear out of her body. Rahne still continued to transform, willing her wolf form forward and ignoring the pain. She had grown accustomed too far worse, after all. When she was done, Rahne took a moment to catch her breath and let her swimming vision clear. Dani felt Rahne's painful transformation thru the psi-link they shared, but she deliberately didn't show it, as she didn't want to upset Rahne more. Rahne herself was very surprised at what had happened, her transformations had never once been that painful before.

"How do you feel?" Cecelia asked carefully.

"Weak." Rahne said, her eyes watering and voice wavering. Despite her initial fear of her change form, Rahne had grown to love the increased strength, speed and agility that accompanied it. But she could feel that it was all gone now, her enhanced senses were the only thing left undamaged. She stepped down from the examination table and carefully walked across the room to test her strength, or in this case, her lack thereof. She could walk, but she looked like a newborn babe discovering how for the first time.

"It feels a lot... weaker now." Rahne said. She was completely transformed into her wolf form, but she didn't feel much of the strength that had once been there, "But at least ah ken walk... unassisted better."

Rahne tried so hard not to think about the fact that the only way she could walk like a normal person now was as a human werewolf. Thru the psi-link she shared with Dani, Rahne suddenly felt a sudden wave of shock and hatred coming from Dani. She could also sense Dani's heart rate jump and her body temperature rise.

_Dani, what's wrong? _Rahne asked over the special psi link they shared

_Your...nothing, it's nothing. _ Dani nervously replied. Rahne looked at Dani and she traced her eyes, and discovered what Dani was so shocked about.

"Muh...tail's gone." Rahne felt sick to her stomach as she said that. Her transformation into her wolf form was accompanied by the growth a short, one-foot long tail. And it was no longer there. Her tail wasn't something that was in anyway useful, but it was still a part of her body that Rahne would never have surrendered. Another part of her body that those butchers had taken from her forever.

"I was thinking last night, Rahne. We need to get you some clothes, so why don't we go into town, get you some clothes, maybe catch a movie and dinner?" Dani suggested, trying to cheer Rahne up. It wasn't like things could get worse...

"I'd rather not..." Rahne said, "I don' have any money...I mean."

"I talked to the professor last night before I went to bed, and he loaned me his credit card. Money's not a problem, Rahne."

"I cannae jus' take his money, Dani, after everythin' he's down fer me!" Rahne protested.

"He volunteered it, Rahne. Look, I know you want to, but you can't just hide here in the mansion for the rest of your life. You need to get out some, and it's a beautiful day."

"F'r shoppin'."

"Yep."

"I...need some shoes, then." Rahne sighed.

"Don't worry about that, Rahne, I have that covered as well. You can just use an old pair of mine. I'll go grab them, and we'll be on our way."

"If I could have a moment with you in private, Dani, I may be able to speed you on your way faster." A voice telepathically commented.

"I told you already Frost, Rahne doesn't want, or need, your help."Dani spat back.

"And I accept that, for the most part. Just meet me at cerebro for a moment, and I won't bother you again." Frost calmly replied telepathically

"I'm going to hold you to that, Frost."

Dani excused herself and went to meet Frost.

"God only knows what that woman wants now." Dani thought angrily to herself. Despite the fact that the other X-Men vouched for Frost, Dani couldn't bring herself to trust the woman. It wasn't just the fact that Frost had kidnapped and attempted to brainwash the New Mutants the first time they met her. It was mainly the fact that the second time Frost made a bid for control of the New Mutants, she took advantage of them after they were traumatized following a battle with a being calling itself the Beyonder. That Frost would take advantage of them, including Rahne, in such a vulnerable state infuriated Dani like nothing else. After that, Dani vowed to never let Frost get her hands on another New Mutants, ever again. When she opened the door to cerebro, Frost didn't even acknowledge her entrance. It was her personal way of saying 'screw you', even when she was offering help.

"What do you want?" Dani asked, "I'm not in the mood for small talk right now, especially with you."

"So then I won't waste a moment of your time." Frost said. She stood up, walked towards Dani and handed her a shopping bag.

"What's this?"

"It's clothes for Rahne to wear when you take her out today. There's a sweater, bra, underwear, jeans, socks and a pair of shoes, all her size. There is also a handi-cap parking sticker in there, as well."

"When did..."

"I had them bought for Rahne after I found what happened to her. It's better than having her go out in public with old hand me downs of a woman who is twice her size, don't you think?"

"I...guess so. Thank you, Emma." Dani said, swallowing her pride with considerable effort, "Thank you very much. I'm sure Rahne with appreciate it."

"She doesn't have to know that's it's from me, if you like."

"With due respect, why are you helping me?" Dani ask suspiciously

"I'm not. I'm helping Rahne. I know you don't believe me, Dani, but people do change. When the Hellions were killed, I reexamined my goals and have dedicated myself to helping young mutants thrive in this world. Something I failed to do with the Hellions." She explained evenly.

"Well, thanks. I sure Rahne will be glad to have something to wear other than some old hand me downs." Dani said. She left, not sure what to make of Frost now. But she was glad that Rahne had some good cloths to wear all the same.

"That was awfully nice of her tae do f'r me." Rahne commented over the psi-link she shared with Dani while she was in her wolf form.

"With Frost I'm sure somehow, someway, that's it's enlightened self-interest. But now you can be seen in public now." Dani said dismissively as she returned to Rahne. Dani helped Rahne get change into the cloths Frost had given her and then said, "I'll grab an image inducer, and we'll be on our way, Rahne."

"No." Rahne said forcefully.

"What? Why?" Dani asked, "You'll be able to walk in your wolf form, after all."

"I'm Rahne Sinclair, Dani, nae Wolfsbane. I'm nae goin' t' live muh life as a wolf girl. I did that once, an' I hated it." Rahne said as she took her crutches, "I'm not goin' tae hide what I am, even if what I am is crippled. I just have tae learn tae make do, is all."

After they left, Cecelia started to go over the medical charts of some of the more unusual mutant students. Their physiology was very different from 99 of the patients Cecelia treated, and she didn't want to be caught flat-footed if something went wrong.

"What I wouldn't give for a one size fits all medical treatment." She thought to herself.

"You didn't tell her, did you?"

Cecelia turned around and saw Emma Frost standing in the door way with her hands on her hips and in her normal 'holier than thou' pose, " Why didn't you tell Rahne? It's been enough time, I should think."

"Tell her what?"

"Don't play stupid, Ms. Reyes, it's quite unbecoming for a doctor. You know exactly what I'm talking about."

"How did you know? Only Jean, me and Hank knew about that!" Cecelia asked incredulously

"Because last time I checked, I wasn't stupid." Emma chided, "I read the report on what was done to her, how they tortured her, and put two and two together. I know what you left out. I'll ask again, why didn't you tell her? You don't have to be a cultural expert to realize how important it is to her."

"Because I don't think she can handle the news just yet, okay? Forgive me if I want to spare that poor kid some pain!" Cecelia snapped

"You'll have to tell her sooner or later, and it's not news that will get better with age." Emma stated, with a trace of sadness

"Don't you think I know that? Just give me some time, okay? It's not every day I have to tell someone they lost their future!"


	10. Ten steps back

Chapter 10 Ten Steps Back  
  
"Come on Rahne, smile! You're about to go shopping with an unlimited credit card! That's most women's dream!"  
  
Rahne didn't respond. She just ran her hand over her stomach slowly, lost in thought. Unknown to everyone but herself, her wolf form gave her an enhanced feel for her body. Rahne could even feel the pins in her arms that were used to set her bones while in her wolf form, she could feel the areas where the tendons and cartilage in her legs had been damaged and finally, when she transformed into wolf form, her stomach area felt rather odd. Rahne couldn't place her finger on it, but it never felt like that before.  
  
"Rahne? You there?"  
  
"Huh? I'm sorry, Dani, what were ye sayin'?"  
  
"Never mind, Rahny. Nice day isn't it?"  
  
"I... suppose." Rahne said neutrally  
  
"Come on fur top, try to cheer up some. I know it's not easy..."  
  
"Ah don' have much tae be happy aboot, Dani." Rahne said flatly, "An' I doubt that I ever will again."  
  
"Don't say that Rahne, Try to remember the good times you've had. Remember when we hid air fresheners in Amara's uniform? Remember what happened when she transformed into her lava form?" Dani smiled  
  
"Heh, she smelled like burned strawberries for a week." Rahne chuckled slightly.  
  
"She almost smiled." Dani thought to herself, "Remember when the Professor found Bobby's and Sam's stash of play boy magazines?"  
  
"Aye, Sam turned a new shade o' red!" Rahne snickered.  
  
"Yeah, and they both had to write a three page essay on why it was wrong to keep contraband from the teachers. Now that I think about it, I can't remember what the professor did with the play boys."  
  
"Gave 'm t' Logan, most likely." Rahne commented.  
  
"That reminds me, did I ever tell you about the time me, Sam and Kitty spiked Wolverine's cigars with marijuana?" Dani asked  
  
"Excuse me? How on earth did ye accomplish that?"  
  
"Me and Sam talked Kitty into phasing some marijuana directly into Logan's cigars. That way, he wouldn't be able to smell it when he lit them up. For ten straight minutes, he was telling us how he fought off undead Nazi legions alongside Gandhi in India!" Dani laughed, recalling the incident  
  
"How come ye or Sam never told me this?" Rahne asked, barely able to talk without laughing herself.  
  
"Well, Wolverine gave us three very good reasons not to." Moonstar explained.  
  
When they finally reached the mall, Dani was thankful for the handi-cap sticker. The mall was full, with people speeding all about looking for a parking space.  
  
"Place looks pretty crowded today. We need to work on our timing some." Dani commented.  
  
"We...we ken always come back, Dani." Rahne suggested  
  
"Nonsense, Rahne, it's not a problem." Dani said as she pulled into a parking space. Dani carefully helped Rahne out of the car and helped her to her feet. They started to walk towards the entrance...  
  
"We'll have to get you a decent wardrobe..."  
  
"Dani..."  
  
"...a few pairs of shoes..."  
  
"Dani!"  
  
"...maybe catch a movie..."  
  
"Dani!! Please, stop!" Rahne shouted, almost in tears. Dani turned around and saw that Rahne was at least fourteen feet behind her, and not for lack of trying. Other people were rudely brushing past her, threatening to knock her over and Rahne herself looked like she was about to break down and cry.  
  
"She's not that fast on crutches, you stupid idiot!" Dani yelled to herself. She sprinted back to her friend's side.  
  
"Used t' be, yuir the one who couldnae keep up wit' me physically," Rahne said miserably, her voice cracking.  
  
"Times change. I know it's hard now Rahne, but you'll get used to it and adjust. It just takes time." Dani reassured her  
  
"I don' think that's possible."  
  
Dani couldn't really think of anything to say. As Wolfsbane, Rahne enjoyed enhanced physical strength, speed that an Olympian would envy and agility that would put most professional dancers to shame. Now, it was made painfully obvious that Rahne couldn't even walk at a normal pace, and her wolf form, which was once her means of physical freedom, was now her only means to be physically normal. But as Wolfsbane, she would stand out like the elephant Man's ugly brother in public. It was like going from driving a formula one racecar to driving a broken down taxicab in New York rush hour.  
  
"I promise you Rahne, things will get better."  
  
Dani, this time taking care to walk at a far slower pace, led Rahne into a nearby J.C Pennies. Rahne, at first, attempted just to buy whatever seemed the cheapest regardless of taste or fashion. She didn't want to waste the professor's money on herself, after all. With more than a little prodding, Dani convinced Rahne to buy herself some clothes that weren't on sale and were clothes that she actually liked. Dani had to bite her tongue about how conservative most of the clothes were, though, but that was expected.  
  
"Would it kill her to buy a tank top, or a pair of shorts? I mean, turtle necks?" Dani asked herself. After forty minutes, Rahne had bought herself about two weeks worth of cloths.  
  
"I think that's enough now, Dani. We ken head back now..."  
  
"Don't be ridiculous Rahne, we have barely started!" Dani debated on whether or not to tell Rahne that the Professor actually set a minimum on how much money they were to spend, and they hadn't come close to reaching it, "I think I'll hold off on that information for now. Hopefully I can get her out of her 'I'm not worth it' funk she's in." Dani thought to herself  
  
"Look, I need to run these clothes out to the van. Why don't you sit over there on that bench, and I'll be right back?"  
  
"All...alright. Hurry back, Dani."  
  
Dani sprinted back to the van, and piled the stuff in the back seat. She quickly returned to Rahne, and was stunned when she saw Rahne sitting on the bench, her head in her hands, crying and sweating terribly.  
  
"Rahne, what's wrong, sweetheart?" Dani asked as she rushed to her friend's side  
  
"I...don' know, Dani. I...I really don'. When you left, I jus' felt so...so afraid and...anxious... I don' know... what's wrong with me...I'm losin' me mind..."  
  
"No, you're not Rahne." Dani sighed, "It's called a panic attack, and it happens sometimes in cases of severe trauma. Hank filled me in on it a few days ago and, to be honest Rahne, I think you should get some professional help." Dani explained as rubbed Rahne's back to calm her down.  
  
"No."  
  
"Rahne, I really think that you should talk someone who's trained..."  
  
"No! I've already had muh body dissected, and I'm nae aboot t' let that happen tae me mind! The last shrink I saw wasn't even canny enough t' even recognize I'd been turned int' Pavlov's dog!" Rahne said angrily, "There are only three doctors I trust in the world anymore, an' one o' them is dead. An' what doctor could possibly understand what I lived thru? Jus'...stay with me while I calm down, alright?"  
  
"..."  
  
And Dani did. After Rahne's panic attacked passed, the two continued to shop. After a while, both of them got hungry and stopped at the food court. Dani started to become concerned about Rahne after she bought four slices of pizza and totally consumed them, along with two 18-ounce cokes.  
  
"Umm, Rahne? You might want to leave some room for dinner, you know. Wolfing, pardon the pun, down all that food might ruin your appetite, you know."  
  
"Oh...muh...lord..." Rahne said with a smile  
  
"What?"  
  
"Dani, you sounded like a mother, jus' then!" Rahne snickered  
  
"Oops, sorry about that, Rahne. I didn't mean too, honest. It just slipped out." Dani shrugged  
  
"Oh, it's nae a problem. And don' worry about me appetite, I'm still hungry!"  
  
"Well, I think you've had enough. Why don't we take these back to the van and we can catch a movie before we head back."  
  
Once that was done, the two of them tried to decide on what movie to see.  
  
"What's something your average protestant fundamentalist would like?" Dani asked herself. Dani had a preference for action movies, but Rahne preferred movies with a lighter subject. After much debate, they picked a movie and headed in. When Rahne got to the doors of the movie theater, however she stopped cold.  
  
"Rahne? What's wrong?"  
  
"It's ...dark in there."  
  
Dani winced inside. When she suggested that they see a movie, Dani had completely forgotten about Rahne's pathological fear of the dark...  
  
"If you don't want to, we don't have to go in Rahne..." Dani said  
  
"But...we already bought the tickets..."  
  
"That doesn't matter at all. It's just a movie, Rahne."  
  
"Yuir right, Dani." Rahne sighed  
  
"So, do you want to leave?"  
  
"Not on me life. Like ye said, it's just a bleedin' movie. I'm not about t' run away from it like some coward." Rahne said with a trace of anger, "Just...could I hold yuir hand while we watch the movie? Please? I know it's silly, an' all but..."  
  
"It's not silly or a problem, Rahne. Lets head in."  
  
As they went inside, Rahne was naturally a little tense. When the lighters were lowered to start the movie, she squeezed Dani's hand a little bit harder, but she never broke down or felt the need to leave. After a little bit, she did something she hadn't done in some time. Rahne laughed and enjoyed herself.  
  
***  
  
"Well, I would say that was a day well spent. We got you some cloths to wear, saw a movie, and we're still back at the mansion by six. Do you think you'd be up for eating dinner with the 'senior staff', Rahne? I know Kurt's been dying to see you."  
  
"I...I'm nae sure, Dani." Rahne said hesitantly  
  
"Please? The others really miss your company too, you know."  
  
"I'll try, Dani. I'm nae aboot tae make any promises I cannae keep. I jus' hope the professor isnae mad that we bought so much."  
  
"Trust me, Rahne, he won't mind at all." Dani said as she pulled the car into the garage.  
  
"Rahne, if you don't mind, I need to do a work out before dinner. Do you think you can keep yourself occupied while I do that?" Dani asked as they entered the mansion  
  
"I'll be fine, Dani. I'll ken just watch the telly in the rec room till dinner."  
  
As they parted, Dani debated on whether or not to just forget about a workout and stay with Rahne. Ultimately, she decided that Rahne didn't need her to be with her every waking moment anymore.  
  
"I think she's coming out of her shell now. Thank the spirits." Dani noted to herself.  
  
But like many things in life, that was about to change.  
  
***  
  
Rahne looked around the rec room for the remote. Like most small things that people needed for day-to-day survival, it was currently M.I.A.  
  
"I ken never find it went I need it." Rahne grumbled, "And 'Touched By an Angel' has probably started already."  
  
While she hunted for the remote, Rahne didn't notice Jean and Cecelia enter the room, concern written all over their faces.  
  
"Rahne, honey, we need to talk about something." Jean said  
  
"Oh, 'ello Cecelia, I been meaning t' talk ye 'boot somethin'," Rahne said. She sat down on the couch, and fiddled with her hands some. Rahne knew she had to ask, but she wasn't quite sure she wanted to hear the answer.  
  
"About what, Rahne?"  
  
"Am I...am I pregnant? I've been so hungry lately, an' muh stomach area jus' feels odd...I don' know how tae describe it really... an'; now that I think aboot it, I know I missed muh period, or at least I think I did..." Rahne asked nervously. Although she tried to hide it, just asking the question disturbed her a great deal. She didn't want to be a single mother, after all. She did love children and if she was pregnant, she knew she would love the child with all her heart regardless of the fact that it would be a child of sin, but she didn't want to be a mother just yet, to say nothing of the fact that it would be a reminder of her rape, "It's the only reason I...ken think o' f'r bein' so hungry an' all."  
  
Both Jean and Cecelia winced at the suggestion, and they exchanged a nervous glance at one another.  
  
"You're... not pregnant, Rahne. Your large appetite is a result of your body attempting to build up its stores of vitamins and nutrients for your wolf form that it lost when you were recovering, it's perfectly normal. For you, I mean." Cecelia explained  
  
"Oh, that's a relief," Rahne sighed, "I dinnae know whit I would do if I was pregnant. So, what did ye want to talk tae me 'bout?"  
  
"As you know, when you were held captive, they removed some of your internal organs. Like one of your lungs and a kidney." Cecelia said, her voice coming close to wavering  
  
"An'... me tail, but aye, what of it? I ken live with what I have left, can't I?"  
  
"..."  
  
"She doesn't have the slightest clue where this is going." Cecelia thought to herself. "I don't know if I can do this to her."  
  
"We've put off telling her long enough."Jean told her telepathically, "But I'll tell her, if that's what you want."  
  
"It...it is, I'm sorry, Jean."  
  
"Rahne, when you were held prisoner, they...they removed your reproductive organs. Specifically, your womb and ovaries were removed. I'm so sorry, honey, but... you can never have children." Jean explained, "That's...that's most likely why your stomach area feels odd."  
  
When Jean said that, Rahne's face went pale and her heart stopped. The words hit her like a sledgehammer, and Rahne's entire world came crashing down around her. Never have children. All her hopes and dreams for the future... No. It couldn't be true, she thought to herself, it can't be true. Maybe they made a mistake; somehow they had to have made a mistake...  
  
"What...are ye talking aboot? Are...are ye sure?" Rahne nearly begged, still in shock  
  
"Of course I'm sure, Rahne. I'm so sorry..."  
  
"So, I'm... nae a real woman anymore." Rahne said emotionlessly.  
  
"Just because you can't have children doesn't mean you aren't a woman, Rahne, a lot of women..."  
  
Never have children.  
  
"Bein' a woman... means a lot o' different things... tae a lot o' different people, Ms. Reyes!" Rahne growled, her eyes filled with tears. Without meaning too, Rahne had shifted completely into her change form. Rahne clenched her fists so hard that her claws dug into her palms and her hands bled, but Rahne didn't even notice or care. Any physical pain was completely drowned out by her emotional pain now, "An' I know what it means t' me!"  
  
Never have children.  
  
"...Moira loved you deeply, Rahne, you know that..."  
  
Never have children.  
  
"...And I love Nathan more than anything in the world..."  
  
Never. Have. Children. Those words screamed thru her mind, cutting Rahne to her very soul. Jean desperately tried to comfort her by explaining how she loved Nathan, her own adoptive son, like her own flesh and blood and she tried to remind Rahne of Moira's love for her, but Rahne would have none of it. To her, it was just a proof of the happiness of others, happiness that she felt, no, she knew she would never know now. Happiness she could never be a part of now for as long as she lived. Jean's attempts to console her felt more like hot knives to her heart. Rahne collapsed to her knees, unable to catch her breath and feeling like she was going to vomit.  
  
"I know how much it meant to you, Rahne," Jean said as she put her hand on Rahne's shoulder to comfort her, "But it isn't the end of the world..."  
  
"Shut up! Shut up! Ye don't understand! Ye can't! Just...jus' shut up an' leave me alone!!" Rahne screamed. She smacked Jean's hand away and darted out of the rec room, sobbing. 


	11. Importance of Family

As Hank McCoy walked across the campus, he tried to desperately think about something, anything other than what he had just done in his lab. He felt dirty, disgusted with himself and yet, at the same time, ecstatic. He had taken the first step to saving millions of lives.  
  
-But at what cost?- He asked himself, -What terrible cost?-  
  
" McCoy! I need to talk to you for a second!"  
  
Hank turned and saw Cecelia Reyes.  
  
" About what, my dear doctor?"  
  
" I…we told Rahne about…well, you know."  
  
" I see. How did she handle the news?"  
  
" Poorly. Honestly, Hank? I …I could have sworn that I heard her heart break when Jean told her she couldn't have children. I can't begin to imagine how much that meant to her."  
  
" I understand. I know it was difficult to do, but you had to tell her sooner or later. What did you need to talk to me about?"  
  
" I just wanted you to know that we can start planning hormone replacement therapy for her."  
  
" Is that all?"  
  
" Huh?"  
  
" You could have simply told me that tomorrow, you know. Is something on your mind?"  
  
" Yes, no, I guess. I guess that after all this time as a doctor, I still hate delivering news like that."  
  
" Yes. I can relate I…"  
  
Before McCoy could finish his sentence, they heard a large crash that came from the direction of the main gate.  
  
" What was that?"  
  
" Well, I don't think we'll discover anything just standing here." McCoy said. He quickly picked Cecelia up and leaped in the direction of the disturbance. What they saw when they got there was an old 1986 Buick restrained by the security cables and a woman inside, frantic to get out. McCoy turned the cables off and helped the woman get out of her car.  
  
" Youhavegottohelpme! Mysonwasjustassaultedandthehospitalwon'ttakehimbecause theythinkhe'samutantsandIneedyourhelp!"  
  
" Madam! I must insist that you calm down and rationally explain to me why you are here, if I am to be of any help to you!"  
  
" My Joshua's been attacked! He was attacked because some punks thought he was a mutant, but he's not! He got caught in a grease fire and the hospital won't take him and and you have to help him!"  
  
Cecelia looked in the back seat, and saw who she was referring too. About half the young man's body was completely covered in scars, and his face was completely covered in bruises and blood. There was a pool of blood on the floor seat that looked at least an hour old to Cecelia's trained eyes.  
  
" Hank, it looks really bad, do we have a stretcher anywhere near here?"  
  
" I'm afraid they are all on the lower levels. I'll go fetch one…"  
  
" No time, Hank. He'll be dead before you get back. I've got an idea that I'll need your help with. I'm going to extend my force field around him, immobilizing him completely so we can move him without causing any harm. It's going to take all my effort, so you'll have to carry him down."  
  
Cecelia closed her eyes and concentrated, extending her force-field around the young man, completely enveloping and immobilizing the young man. Once she was done, Hank carefully picked him and and made haste for the medi- lab. On the way down the man's mother filled Hank in on her son's medical history. They quickly placed the youmg man under a scanner that McCoy activated while Cecelia started to cut off Joshua's cloths.  
  
" What do the scanners show, Hank? How bad is he?"  
  
" His right lung is collapsed, his left lung has been punctured by his broken ribs and bone fragments in it and is also on the verge of collapse, his kidney is ruptured, he has a severe concussion, he has quite a bit of swelling in his brain, multiple fractures in his ribs and he's lost almost one third of his blood." Hank said grimly.  
  
" Cripes, is that all?" Cecelia asked flippantly.  
  
" I only wish. The scans show his blood type is O negative."  
  
" Shit! We already used up all our plasma operating on Rahne! What about all those alien machines you got laying around here?"  
  
"They aren't made for human use and can only do so much for them! It would take me at least twenty minutes to calibrate it for his biology, and we don't have that time. I'm afraid that his boy's chances for survival are… non-existent."  
  
" I've heard others say that before, McCoy, and that didn't stop me from proving wrong," Cecelia said she quickly scrubbed down and donned her medical scrubs, " I don't know about you, but I intend to use any and every resource at my disposal to save this young man's life. What about you?"  
  
Hank didn't respond. He rushed over to a medicine cabinet and took out a jar with a green solution inside of it.  
  
-Somehow, I had to know it would come to this. That is why you kept it in the medi-lab, isn't it McCoy?- He asked himself as he filled a syringe with the solution.  
  
" Hank, what are you doing? I need your help here! His blood pressure is almost non existent!"  
  
" No, you won't any help after this." Hank said as he injected the solution into Joshua. Seconds after that was done, the bruises on the young man's face disappeared. All bruising, all his previous scars, all outward signs of damage quickly and completely disappeared. Cecelia ran over to the medical scanners and gaped in astonishment.  
  
" What on earth…the swelling in his brain is gone…his lungs just repaired themselves somehow…his kidneys are fine and his body is purging all the poisons that were released when it ruptured…What the hell did you give him, Hank?"  
  
" It's…something that I devised using some chemicals that the Shi'ar had given us some time ago. I wanted to test it before I used on a human patient, but…"  
  
" I understand, Hank. I don't honestly think we could have saved him any other way. Man, that thing is a miracle worker!"  
  
" I was afraid of that." Hank muttered.  
  
" Completely repairing damaged organs, regenerating and replacing scar tissue, correctly and quickly healing damaged bones, my god Hank, you may have created the greatest medical advancement in the history of medicine!"  
  
So caught up in the miracle they were watching, neither doctor noticed the slight glow of psychic energy coming from outside in the hallway.  
  
***  
  
" Rahne, you in there?" Dani asked thru the door of Rahne's room.  
  
" Go away, Dani! Jus' leave me be!"  
  
-Guess so- Dani thought to herself, " You know I can't do that, Rahne."  
  
Dani tried to enter the room, but discovered the door was locked. Dani sighed, and just kicked the door in. Rahne was sitting up in her bed, with tears in her eyes, snot running out her nose and not very happy to see Dani.  
  
" I locked that door f'r a reason, Moonstar!" Rahne growled.  
  
" And I kicked it in for a reason too, Rahne. Jean told me about what's wrong, about what they did to you. I'm so sorry."  
  
"Ye mean what they took from me! So ye know I'm going tae live the rest of muh life alone an' die that way!"  
  
" You're not even twenty years old, Rahne. It's a little early to predict your future, don't you think?" Dani regretted saying that almost immediately. It really came out all wrong…  
  
" What do ye know?! Ye don' …have the slightest idea… what I've lost!" Rahne snarled, "Get out!"  
  
" Rahne, I want to help…"  
  
" Get out!" Rahne shouted. Without realizing it, Rahne shifted to her wolf form and struck 'Dani' with all her strength. Despite the extensive damage that was done to her body, Rahne's upper body strength was still impressive and she knocked 'Dani' hard into a far wall. Rahne instantly realized what she had done and rushed to her friend's side.  
  
" Dani! OmygodI'msosorrypleasebealright!"  
  
Rahne was shocked when she saw her friend's body dissolve into mist. Rahne turned around and saw Dani standing where she had just been moments ago.  
  
" It's okay, Rahne, it was just one of my mirages, I'm fine. I understand…"  
  
" Then leave me alone!" Rahne screamed. She lashed out at Dani again, this time with her claws. Dani saw the blow coming and she ducked back while at the same time bringing her left arm up and forward so that Rahne's claws connected and tore at her flesh. Rahne stood there for a moment, dumfounded. This time, she knew for a fact she had hurt her friend. She could smell the blood, feel Dani's pain thru the psi-link they shared, but she couldn't quite understand why she was attacking her best friend, who only wanted to help her.  
  
" Well, you've still got a good right." Dani winced.  
  
" Dani…yuir bleedin'…we…we need t' get ye t' the medi-lab!" Rahne exclaimed. She started to shift back to her human form and walked towards Dani to examine her wound, like she had been taught by Moira, but in her rush to aid her friend; Rahne had completely forgotten that she couldn't walk in her human form. She nearly fell to the floor before Dani caught her and helped sit her down on the bed.  
  
" Dani, I'm…I'm so sorry! I dinnae mean t'…"  
  
" It's okay, Rahne. I let you tag me. I hoped it would calm you down some and… I think it worked." Dani explained, -Go me-.  
  
" But…"  
  
" I'm going to go get a towel to cover this up so I'm not bleeding all over your bed and get you some tissues, and then we are going to talk, okay Rahne?"  
  
" But… yuir arm…"  
  
" Hurts like hell, but I let it get clawed so that we could talk. Do you want my pain to be for nothing, Rahne?" Dani asked. She knew that shame was one way of getting Rahne to fall in line, though she hated using it.  
  
"No." Rahne sighed.  
  
" Neither do I. I'll be right back, Rahne."  
  
Dani wasn't gone long. She grabbed a red towel and made a make shift tunicate out of it and came back to Rahne, who was sitting nervously on her bed.  
  
" Dani, yuir arm could get infected! We need tae…"  
  
" It'll be fine, furtop. It's not about to fall off in the next few minutes, so it'll be okay." Dani said as she handed Rahne some tissues and sat down next to her.  
  
" Now, what on earth makes you think you're going to die alone, Rahne?"  
  
" Ye wouldn't understand."  
  
" Try me, kiddo." Dani said as she ran her hand thru Rahne's short, red hair. Rahne laid down and put her head on Dani's lap as she tried to explain her feelings that she herself barely understood.  
  
" Honestly, Dani? I don' want t' fight the 'good fight' all muh life. I ne'er really have. I jus' want t' find a man who loves me, settle down an' raise a family. Have children that I could love an' care f'r. I don' care how stupid, silly or sexist that sounds, but that's what I want from life."  
  
" I understand that, Rahne, but just because you can't have children doesn't mean can't have the life you want. I shouldn't have to go over the virtues of adoption with you, of all people…"  
  
" No, Dani. Ye…ye don' understand. Grownin' up, I never really knew love o' any kind. Craig ne'er cared for me… like a father, or a parent shid. He did everythin' in his power tae convince me that I dinnae deserved tae be loved. The other children in Kinross jus' made fun o' me because they could. I was the town bastard… that everyone either mocked or pitied, with only mum really caring aboot me as a human being before she adopted me. I…I remember when I fell in love with muh wolf prince in Asgard. I…I was so confused when I met him, because before him, I ne'er truly believed… that anyone could possibly love me. I never really knew what it was before him! When I saw Douglock f'r the first time, I immediately convinced muhself that he was truly Doug, because I truly wanted tae believe that the boy who loved me an' gave his life f'r me was still alive. I left whatever life I made f'r muhself with X-Factor when I learned that Mum was dying, because… she was the only family I had. I want a family that's mine and mine alone, and that's ne'er goin' tae happen now. I ken count the number of people who love me on one hand, and it's going to stay that way… f'r the rest of muh life now."  
  
" Don't say that, Rahne. I know plenty of men out there who would love you for who and what you are, and that's a beautiful young woman who has triumphed over all kinds of adversity. Just because you can't have children doesn't mean you won't find a man who loves you and is willing to spend his life together with you."  
  
" But I want children, Dani, more than anythin' in the world. T' give them the love an' care I ne'er had growin' up as a child. An' what man is going to want a woman who cannae give him an heir? Who's crippled and cannae possibly keep up with him in any way?"  
  
" Rahne…"  
  
" Dani, I know ye mean well, but jus' stop, okay? I don' want a pep talk, or someone t' tell me everythin' goin' t' be alright when it's nae. I jus' want t' lay here an' cry while muh best friend comforts me. Is that tae much t' ask?"  
  
" …"  
  
" Is it?"  
  
" No, no it's not."  
  
  
  
***  
  
After Rahne fell asleep crying, again, Dani carefully moved herself off Rahne's bed and slid a pillow under Rahne's head. Dani then pulled another blanket out of the closet and placed it over her.  
  
-At least she's hit rock bottom- Dani thought bitterly to herself, -There aren't anymore surprises-  
  
Dani looked out the window and saw that it was now late at night.  
  
-Damnit, Rahne missed dinner and everyone's most likely in bed now- She scowled. –And my arm is killing me!-  
  
Dani headed back towards the mansion to see if anyone was awake, to help her with her arm. Unfortunately, everyone had gone to bed. Dani wandered thru the mansion, and noticed that the lights were still on in the professor's study. She went to knock on the door…  
  
" It's open, Dani. Come in."  
  
" Hey, Professor, I was wondering if a I could, uuh, get a hand with something."  
  
" Certainly, Dani. What's the matter?"  
  
-What isn't?- She thought to herself. Dani peeled off the blood soaked towel that had been covering the wound Rahne had given her and showed the Professor.  
  
" Rahne?"  
  
" Yep. You always hurt the one's you love, I guess." Dani said.  
  
" Dry humor really doesn't suit you, Dani."  
  
" Sorry, but I just feel like I've been dragged thru Times Square behind the back of a bus now. Dry humor is about all I have left."  
  
" I understand." Xavier led Dani down to the lower levels to where they kept the medical supplies. " How is she doing? How is… her recovery coming now?"  
  
" Honestly? She was making some real progress, but the revelation that she can't ever have children just destroyed all that and ripped the scab off of everything else. I…I think I can feel a little bit of her die every day, Professor. She barely lived thru something I would never wish on my worst enemy… and she can't possibly put it behind her in any real way now. Thanks to the damage done to her, she'll always be reminded of what happened to her no matter how hard she tries to forget. When she stands up to do anything, when she tried to find a man who loves her and wants to spend the rest of his life with her. Everyday is now a reminder to her of what she lived thru."  
  
" Perhaps I should talk to her. I remember having to adjust to being a in a wheel chair after Lucifer crushed my legs." Xavier swabbed Dani's wounds with rubbing alcohol, carefully cleaning them.  
  
" That would be good, but I really don't know how much help you would be, honestly. Before she was butchered and crippled, she could run the mile in under two minutes and could bench press over six hundred pounds. Now, she can't walk without crutches, and she's sore and tired all the time. She's gone from superhuman abilities to barely human abilities."  
  
" I… see your point. Let's get this under the dermal regenerator, shall we?"  
  
Once that was done, Dani asked a question that had been bouncing around in her head for some time.  
  
" Why can't we use all this Shi'ar crap we have laying around to heal her? Hank and Cecelia can't seem to give me a straight answer without going into biology 101. This stuff can work freakin' miracles, after all."  
  
" There is a limit to what they can do, though. They were designed for alien beings, not humans, and the radiation that they use to heal would eventually damage human cells if they were exposed to it for too long. That's why we haven't been able to use them to repair Scott's brain damage that prevents him from controlling his optic blasts, and why I haven't used them to heal my legs. Hank looked into it after we learned the extent of the damage to Rahne, but determined that it was impossible to use them to fully heal her."  
  
" And the hits just keep coming." Dani sighed.  
  
" I know it's rather late to ask at this point, but how has she handled Moira's death? I know it couldn't have helped matters any."  
  
" You don't need to comfort her about what happened, if that's what you mean. I think Rahne was prepared for Moira's death, emotionally. She knew that the legacy virus was lethal. That doesn't mean that Rahne was thru mourning her when she was kidnapped and tortured, but it's not a part of her pain now."  
  
" Are you certain there isn't anything I can do for Rahne to help her recover?"  
  
" Not unless you got a miracle up your sleeve." 


	12. Miracles

***  
  
*Miracle. That's what she called it. And I saw it with me own two eyes to boot* Jonathan Starmore, A.K.A the X-Man named Chamber thought to himself. Even among other mutants, Jonathan, or Jono as he preferred to be called, stood out in a crowd. That was because he had a huge hole in his chest that stretched from his mouth to his stomach and leaked powerful psychic energy that could destroy tanks and level the most powerful of foes. But it was also a source of great frustration to Chamber because it forever separated him from the rest of humanity in many small, but important ways. He couldn't eat or drink and he couldn't sing which before his face exploded, he did all the time. After some time, he had come to terms with his deformity, but he still had hope. Hope that somehow, someway he could be something resembling normal again.  
  
-This may not be the smartest idea I've ever had, but it's not like things could get any worse for me, is there?-  
  
He proceeded to lock down the danger room and activate the psi dampeners from the control booth as a precaution for when he injected himself with the green solution that had just saved Joshua's life a few hours before. He knew that he shouldn't have secretly taken it while Cecelia and Hank were 'discharging' Joshua, but he did it anyway. After seeing what he saw, he had hope, real hope for the first time in a long time and he didn't want to risk the possibility that it was a false hope. As he entered the danger room, he hoped that if what he did failed, he would still be able to walk out of the danger room in one piece.  
  
-Here goes nothin'-He thought to himself as he inserted the syringe into a vein in his left arm. At first, he felt nothing. But after a minutes, he felt a cold, numb sensation spread thru out his body, just seconds before he passed out.  
  
-This was a very bad idea- Were the last thoughts that went thru his mind before darkness claimed him.  
  
As Chamber awoke, he noted that he really didn't feel any different. In fact, he felt like hell and wanted to throw up.  
  
" Well, that was a bloody failure! All that hope and, and… " He said aloud. He then caught himself, and did something that until an hour ago, was literally impossible. He smiled. He looked down at his stomach, which was once a powerful furnace of energy. Now, all that remained was a small hole about the size of a baseball leaking psychic energy in the center of his chest.  
  
"Even got me nipples back!" He said, relishing the sound of his long gone voice. He hugged himself, as though to make sure he wasn't dreaming. Although he was overjoyed about the fact that he had his face back, Jono decided to retire for the day. The formula had taken a lot out of him, and he knew he needed to be well rested to explain exactly why there was no longer a huge hole in his chest to everyone. But not before he downed a few pints, of course.  
  
  
  
***  
  
" Rahne, honey? Are you awake? I need to talk to you about something." Jean said thru the door of Rahne's room. It was Two o clock in the afternoon, so Jean already knew the answer. But there was still no response. Jean opened the door and walked it. She saw Rahne lying in her bed, staring absently out the window.  
  
" Rahne? Cecelia and Hank sent me to tell you that they have some good news for you."  
  
" What? Tae tell me that I have a fatal disease an' that I'm going tae die?"  
  
Jean grimaced at the statement. She could tell that Rahne had completely lost her faith in a better tomorrow now, and it concerned her a good deal. After all, that wasn't the Rahne that Moira always spoke of when she called Winchester. The Rahne Moira always went on and on about was so full of life, of hope, of energy…  
  
" They didn't say, really. They just said that it was important to see you as soon as possible."  
  
Rahne didn't bother to argue. In truth, she didn't really have the willpower anymore. Jean helped her get dressed and walked with her towards the mansion.  
  
" I was thinking, Rahne. Would you like to come with me and Scott to church this weekend? I know…"  
  
" I'm ne'er goin' t' church again, Jean."  
  
" Don't say that Rahne, I know how much church means to you…"  
  
" Then ye know that f'r the first twelve years of muh life, god was used tae make muh life lonely an' miserable. I know god dinnae answer muh prayers when I begged him tae save me mum's life, or every time those horrid men decided ta look at me insides jus' f'r kicks or touch me in ways that they shouldnae have. Maybe I shid be stronger, but I'm nae. I'm nae Jov."  
  
" Rahne…"  
  
" Jean, I know ye mean well, but it's nae open f'r discussion. It's nae just me body that's tired and sore, it's also muh soul. I've made up me mind."  
  
"I… alright. Maybe when this examine is over, would you like to have a picnic over on the south lawn with me and Kurt? He's been asking about you lately."  
  
" I'd… prefer nae t' see Kurt… f'r now." Rahne replied.  
  
" May I ask why?"  
  
" Because…because when'er I see a man, I'm…I'm reminded of wha' t those guards… did t' me…how they hurt me… like only a man could." Rahne explained, with tears in her eyes and a heavy heart, "I know… it's nae right tae f'r me tae hold somethin' like that against him, jus' because he's a man, but… I cannae help it. I ken hardly deal wit' Hank. I'm sorry Jean…"  
  
" Don't be Rahne, you don't have to justify yourself to anyone… Aaaah!"  
  
Jean clutched her head in pain, as though she had suddenly been struck by an unknown force.  
  
"Jean! What's wrong?"  
  
" Someone just tried to scan me! I think it may be ugly out here in a second."  
  
No sooner had Jean said that than three circular pods dropped out of the air and smashed into the ground twenty feet away from the two women. They exploded, and revealed fifth teen heavily armed men inside each one of them, wearing what appeared to be a combination of medical scrubs and high tech weaponry. One of the men stepped forward,  
  
" Attention mutants, we are the U-Men. Surrender to us immediately, or suffer the consequences."  
  
" It takes more than directional explosives and big guns to impressed me," Jean said to herself. She turned to Rahne, " Change into your wolf form and get out of here, Rahne! It's not safe for you here!" And with that Jean took to the air, smashing several U-Men to the ground with her powers before getting within five feet of them.  
  
" Nae safe?" Rahne said aloud. The idea that she would need to run and hide almost offended her. She had fought alongside the big boys in X-Factor and Excalibur and had more than held her own. When was safety ever a concern? And the U-Men…From what little Rahne knew about them, they were almost as depraved as the scientists and doctors who tortured her those long three months, and that alone was reason enough for Rahne to join the fray. Rahne shifted to her wolf form and ran towards the U-Men. She saw Jean floating in mid air, clutching her head in pain, her nose bleeding as one U-Man aimed a sonic gun at her. Rahne leaped at the solider with the sonic weapon, knowing that if she took him out of the fight, Jean would free to take down the others. But despite her great courage, Rahne had forgotten that her leg strength wasn't what it once was. She smashed into the U-Man, but didn't knock him off his feet like she had planned. He swung the butt of his sonic rifle and smashed it into Rahne's forehead, drawing blood.  
  
-Stupid, stupid! Yuir leg strength is gone!- she chided herself as she crashed to the ground in pain. She easily pushed past the pain in her head and instantly shifted to another mode of attack, one that she knew would work. She knew that the strength in her arms was still incredible, and along with her claws she had more than enough to defeat this villain. The U- Man turned and pulled out a small dart gun filled with sedative and aimed it at Rahne. Rahne attempted to duck to the side to avoid the weapon, like she had done a thousand times before, but before she could do anything, Rahne perceived the information her enhanced senses were giving her. The man smelled of an odd combination of rubbing alcohol, pure oxygen, alkali, iodine and was wearing sterile gloves. Combined with the scent of her own blood, Rahne was vividly reminded of her time in the labs. In an eyeblink, Rahne found herself mentally transported back to them, strapped down to a bed with her stomach cut open.  
  
" Lo'thouIwalkthruthevalleyofdeathIshallfearnoevilforthougharewithme…" Rahne repeated mindlessly, on the verge of unconsciousness as the doctors gathered around her, observing the latest effects of their torture. Half of her was convinced what she was seeing and feeling was real. After all, she could feel the pain from the doctor's incisions, smell the dried blood on her face and body and feel the straps that held her down to the bed. But half of her knew that it was fake, a living nightmare.  
  
-Get up! He's going tae kill ye! Get up!- she screamed to herself. She knew she was completely vulnerable now, unable to defend herself from anything.  
  
" What the hell is this?" The U-Man asked himself as he saw Rahne writhe in terror before him. Rahne's flask back had taken the U-man completely off guard as well and he just stood there, bewildered. He had also forgotten that he was the one thing keeping Jean Grey off balance and vulnerable.  
  
*GET AWAY FROM HER!* A voice screamed in his mind as his body was hit a powerful blast of telekinetic power, knocking him sixty feet thru the air while crushing his weapons.  
  
" Rahne! It's alright! You're safe now!" Jean shouted as she rushed to Rahne's side. She was about to use her powers to help Rahne, but before she could…  
  
" Jean? What…what happened?" Rahne asked as she came out of her flash back, still trembling from what she had just 'seen'.  
  
" You…I…I think you had a flash back, just then, Rahne, but you're safe now." Jean explained as she tore off a piece of her jacket and placed it against the gash on Rahne's head, " That's one nasty cut, Rahne. We need get you to the medi-lab quick to treat this."  
  
" But, the U-Men…"  
  
Jean pointed out the U-Men's positions to Rahne and she saw that the U-Men were all laying unconscious on the ground surrounded Wolverine, Cyclops, Angel, Nightcrawler, Beast, Iceman and what almost looked like the new X- Man Chamber, but without a huge hole in his chest.  
  
" We dealt with them in seconds after you saved me, sweatheart. They were stupid enough to attack while the entire senior staff was here. Let's get you treated, okay?"  
  
" I…need tae… get somethin' from muh room first."  
  
" What? Why would you need to get something from your room?"  
  
" I need tae get somethin' from muh room!" Rahne insisted.  
  
" What's so important about getting something from your room that it can't wait?"  
  
Rahne looked away, too ashamed to look Jean in the face,  
  
" I…soiled… muhself." Rahne said softly, blinking back tears, " Like a bloody coward."  
  
Jean concentrated and stopped the flow of blood from Rahne's wound. She then picked Rahne up with her powers and took her back to her room, while using her telepathy to prevent anyone from seeing them " You saved my life today and put yours in danger without a second thought. That's hardly the act of a coward."  
  
Once Jean helped Rahne change into some clean cloths, she then rushed Rahne to the medi-lab.  
  
" Sorry, we're late. We had a run in with the U-Men and got held up," Jean explained as she placed Rahne on one of the beds, " Rahne got a nasty cut to the head during the fight." Before Jean could offer more assistance…  
  
*Jean?*  
  
*Yes, Professor?*  
  
*I need you and the others to do a security sweep of the mansion grounds. I don't want to chance there being other U-Men out there waiting in secret*  
  
*But Professor, Rahne needs me with her*  
  
*I'm sure that Rahne will be able to get along without you for a time. The other students need you as well. I'm sorry Jean, but the needs of the many out weigh the needs of the few right now*  
  
" Rahne, the professor wants me to check the grounds in case there are any more U-Men out there. Do you think you need me here?"  
  
" Jus' go. I see no reason f'r me tae be an even bigger burden on ye, Jean." Rahne said miserably.  
  
" You're not a burden on anyone, Rahne." Jean replied for what had to be the millionth time. As she left, she wished desperately that Rahne could be happy.  
  
" I don' suppose that ye believe in euthanasia, doctor?" Rahne asked dryly.  
  
" Nope, not really Rahne. Why do you ask?"  
  
" Jean jus' told me that ye wanted tae talk to me 'boot something, an' I had me hopes an' all…"  
  
" Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something Hank discovered. According him, he created it using some of the Shi'ar material and devices laying around here. It's a formula that might help you regain the strength in your legs. But the problem is that's still experimental. Hank told me that it wouldn't be a problem if you took it, but it's full effects would be impossible to determine."  
  
Cecelia deliberately left out the fact that she had seen the formula perform miracles because she didn't want to get Rahne's hopes up prematurely. But she still couldn't hide her enthusiasm. Rahne barely even noticed to it, though.  
  
" If ye aboot tae ask if I want the treatment, the answer is yes. I don' care aboot any side effects or possible complications. I don' have much to live f'r as it is."  
  
" Are you sure, Rahne? It might not help at all."  
  
" I'm very sure, doctor."  
  
" This is quite a leap of faith you're taking, Rahne."  
  
" It's nae a leap of faith when ye don' care where ye land, Ms. Reyes."  
  
" Then lets slip you into a hospital gown and get started."  
  
Cecelia gave Rahne a mild sedative, and then injected her with the 'Pancura' formula (as named by Dr. McCoy). Cecelia took a seat by the scanners and took out a tape recorder to take her notes.  
  
" Subject Rahne Sinclair has just been given…" Cecelia's voice trailed off as she saw the scanners. The formula wasn't just repairing the damaged cartilage and muscles in Rahne's leg, it was regenerating her missing lung, kidney, womb, everything. All at the same time and without taxing her body in any serious way. In fact, the formula seemed to sense Rahne's massive stores of nutrients that her body contained and utilized them. While this was happening, Rahne was gradually transforming into her change form.  
  
-Dear god in heaven, her body is creating stem cells to regrow the organs she lost! But that's impossible!-  
  
Cecelia was so enthralled by the miracle of medical science she was watching, she completely forgot about keeping notes. She felt like she was watching the work of the greatest medical discovery since penicillin, perhaps even greater. It didn't really matter that she wasn't taking notes. The scanners were fully functional and recording every last bit of data.  
  
***  
  
"You did what?!" Hank McCoy roared.  
  
" I saw what that formula did f'r that other chap and I took a leap of faith is all, wha's the big deal?" Chamber asked. He had hoped to reveal his good news to the other X-Men on his own terms, but the U-Men's attack took that option away. When duty calls and all that. Now he was the center of attention of a group of mutants, which was almost always a bad thing.  
  
" What's the big deal anyways, Hank? Jono screwed up, but it was only his butt on the line, after all." Iceman said. –What is Hank so angry about? I've never seen him so pissed!-  
  
" The big deal, Bobby, is that the formula he took was completely untested! Who knows what could have happened?"  
  
" It worked just fine on that lad you brought in." Jono replied, " That seemed like an equal leap of faith to me, mate."  
  
" Look, we don't have time for this," Scott explained, " Jono looks fine to me, and the mansion has just been attacked. Warren, I want you and Bobby to patrol the grounds with Jean in case they have any follow up attacks planned. Logan, I want to check the woods around the mansion to see if the U-Men set up any devises to monitor us. I'll get Moonstar to assist you. The rest of us are going back inside to reassure the students that they're alright and everything's okay."  
  
" I don't need no stinkin' help, one eye." Logan growled.  
  
" Well that's just too damn bad, shorty. You all have your job to do, so get to it."  
  
-This is going to get out of hand very soon- Hank thought to himself, -I'm just glad Rahne will get the formula before it all explodes in my face-  
  
  
  
***  
  
After about half an hour under, Rahne started to awake. As she did, she noted that her legs felt alot stronger now. She lifted them high into the air easily.  
  
-It's jus' because I'm in muh wolf form- She thought to herself. She shifted back to her human and was surprised that her legs still felt strong now. Rahne sat up, and was surprised to find her legs responded to her commands just fine. They weren't sluggish or weak anymore. Cecelia walked over to Rahne, overjoyed with the information that she had to give her.  
  
" The pancura formula was a complete success, Rahne. How do you feel?"  
  
" I…strong. I feel a lot stronger than before. Muh legs feel so much stronger…" Rahne replied, dumbfounded. She stepped down and started walking to test her leg strength. She was a little wobbly, but otherwise fine. She could walk across the room with ease. Rahne absently ran her hands over her body. The static that she felt from where her scars had once been was gone and she didn't feel the least bit sore. Rahne started to shed tears of joy now. She had her legs back; she wasn't a crippled little girl anymore…  
  
" And that's not all, Rahne. According to what the scanners show me, all the organs that were removed have been completely regenerated. Your lung, kidney, womb, everything. As impossible as it sounds, you are now completely healed."  
  
" Yuir… kidding? Everythin'?"  
  
" Not in the least. I don't really know how, but all the internal organs, and I do mean all, have completely regenerated and are now fully functional."  
  
" I…ken have children now?" Rahne was almost in shock at the great news. The news seem far to good to be true…  
  
" Yup. And P.M.S and all that other good stuff that comes with being a woman." Cecelia joked.  
  
" Oh…muh…lord, I dinnae think that was possible!"  
  
"Until a few days ago, it wasn't. But you're back to 100% now, Rahne. No if and or buts about it."  
  
" Oh, thankyethankyethankyethankyethankye!" Rahne hugged Cecelia and wept. It was a miracle, an honest to god miracle…she had her life and future back now! And for the first time in so long, she wasn't reminded of the torture that she suffered.  
  
" I ken hardly wait tae tell Dani!"  
  
Rahne shifted to her full wolf form and dashed out of the medi-lab on all fours, her nose searching for Dani's scent.  
  
***  
  
-You would never know the X-Men have been in these woods- Dani thought to herself as she took in the beautiful scene of nature around her, -they've never been blown up or burned to the ground-  
  
Dani knew that Cyclops assigned her to patrol the woods just to get her out of the mansion and away from Rahne. He probably thought he was doing her a favor, and Dani wasn't really worried about Rahne at the moment. Jean had promised to watch her, and who better to watch Rahne than the most powerful, and compassionate, X-Woman ever? As Dani walked the woods, she spied Doe in the distance.  
  
-Been a while since I've played 'tag'- Dani thought to herself. Growing up, her grandfather had taught her how to sneak up one almost any animal in the wild. He himself had only managed to get within ten feet of an animal before it realized he was there, but Dani had actually managed to touch the animals before they got startled and ran away. It wasn't until years later that she discovered that it was her powers, specifically her telepathy with all animals, that let her get so close them. But before Dani could take another step, the doe turned and shot away.  
  
-What startled it? I know it wasn't me- She asked herself. Dani heard the crunching of dried leaves behind and she turned and saw a red wolf leap thru the air at her, knocking her to the ground. Dani hadn't noticed Rahne due to the fact that Rahne had learned how to block their psi-link when she wanted to, and she really wanted to surprise Dani with the good news. Rahne licked Dani's face profusely, barely giving her a chance to breath.  
  
" Ahh! Rahne…knock it off! Your breath stinks!"  
  
Rahne transformed back into her full human form and helped Dani up. Dani was shocked by what she saw.  
  
" How are you walking while human? Where are your crutches?"  
  
" I don' need 'em anymore, Dani! I'm completely healed!"  
  
" What? How?"  
  
" Accordin' tae Cecelia, Hank used some Shi'ar tech tae heal muh body! I even got muh tail back!"  
  
Rahne transformed into her normal change form, with her body covered in brown fur but still humanoid and somersaulted backwards to emphasize the point.  
  
" I ken walk jus' fine now, hae children, everythin'!"  
  
"That…great, Rahne. I'm very happy for you."  
  
Rahne was too overjoyed to catch the suspicion in Dani's voice. She was whole, healed; a real human being now, and nothing else in the world mattered.  
  
" Oh, I ken hardly wait tae tell Jean!" Rahne exclaimed.  
  
" Umm, do you think that you can wait ten more minutes, Rahne?"  
  
" What? Why would I do that? After all Jean's done f'r me, she shid know as soon as possible!"  
  
Dani was trying very hard not to laugh now…  
  
" Because, furtop, you're in your birthday suit. You would probably flash most of the school! Not that the students would complain, I'm sure."  
  
Rahne glanced down at herself…  
  
" Ack!" In her rush to tell Dani her good news, Rahne had forgotten that the hospital gown she had worn to take the formula wasn't strong enough to take the punishment of her transforming into a wolf and running into and thru the woods. Rahne motioned to cover herself even as she transformed into her full wolf form. She was still naked, but since she was a wolf, it really didn't matter.  
  
" Man, who knew wolves could blush?"  
  
*I'm jus' glad I dinnae flash anyone!* Rahne said over the psi-link she shared with Dani.  
  
"Well, the look on your face was priceless, Rahne."  
  
*I bet. Dani?*  
  
"Yeah, Rahne?"  
  
*Thanks*  
  
" For what?"  
  
*Everythin', an' I mean that* Rahne replied, * Ye and Jean have helped me so much. I know ye put yuir life on hold f'r me. An' I know it's nae been easy helpin' me recover, dealin' with muh poor attitude, muh pain. Thanks f'r jus' bein' there f'r me when I needed ye most. Yuir a wonderful friend, Dani. I could ne'er ask for a better friend, honestly.*  
  
"I know, Rahne. You're right, it wasn't easy, but you're more than worth the effort" Dani said, -And thank the Spirits, I got my smile back - She secretly thought to herself.  
  
" Come on, let's get you some cloths, find Jean and tell her the great news." 


	13. Revelations

Chapter 13 Revelations  
  
"...That will be all for today class. And don't think just because there was an attack this morning that you won't have to do your homework."  
  
As Jean dismissed the class, she chided herself leaving Rahne by herself for so long. It had been two hours now, and she never got a chance to tell Dani that she couldn't stay with her. As soon as Jean had finished her sweep, Cyclops had her stand in for one of the classes and wouldn't take no for an answer. But now that the short class was over, Jean was finally able to get back to Rahne.  
  
"Jean? We need to talk."  
  
Jean turned and saw Dani standing in the doorway with her hands on her hips.  
  
-She's probably going to chew me out for leaving Rahne alone. Can't much blame her- Jean thought to herself, "I know what you're going to say, Dani, and you're right. I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't have left Rahne alone so long, I should have called you or..."  
  
"Don't sweat it, Jean. I'm not here about that. I'm just here to show you this..."  
  
Dani stepped aside to reveal Rahne, wearing a turtleneck sweater and jeans, without any crutches or the slightest limp, and most importantly, smiling and shedding tears of joy, something Jean never expected to see.  
  
"Rahne? Is... that you? Where are your crutches?" Jean asked, completely dumbfounded. In a way, Jean hardly recognized Rahne with her joyful demeanor.  
  
"I don' need 'em anymore! I'm completely healed! I ken walk, have children, an' muh change form is stronger than e'er!" Rahne explained as she rushed to embrace Jean, "I'm a real woman again!"  
  
"That's fantastic Rahne! But how?"  
  
"Accordin' tae Cecelia, Hank created a formula tae heal me usin' all the Shi'ar technology we hae layin' aboot!"  
  
Jean exchanged a curious glance with Dani,  
  
"I guess that's what they wanted to talk to you about..."  
  
"Jean?"  
  
"Yes, Rahne?"  
  
"I know... it's sudden an' all, but..."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Are...are ye still up f'r that picnic? With Kurt, I mean?" She asked nervously.  
  
***  
  
-Picnic. Who ever thought something so simple could make someone so very nervous?- Kurt Wagner, A.K.A Nightcrawler thought to himself he entered the danger room. He ran his fingers over the controls and brought a program that was an old favorite of his. With a flash of light, a set of rings and bars appeared on the ceiling. With a -Bamf!-, he was in the air, casually flipping thru the bars as he mulled over what he would say to Rahne when he saw her later today. Oddly enough, despite the fact he cared a great deal for her, he truly dreaded seeing Rahne.  
  
-I've faced all kinds of threats without thinking twice- He thought to himself, -why can't this be the same?-. But he knew why this was different than any other situation he had really ever faced before. It was because he was now a priest in training. He half expected Rahne to ask him why God would allow someone as pure and devoted as herself to be raped and tortured for three straight months, and he really didn't have a convincing answer that he could give himself, let alone Rahne. And in a way, his friend ship with Rahne made matters even worse. They served together in Excalibur, and in that time he had come to know the young Scots woman very well. They had a lot in common, after all. They were both deeply religious (though in different denominations) and both at times had trouble reconciling their faith with their powers. In fact, both Kurt and Rahne had been chased by angry mobs determined to kill them because they were seen as demons. As a result, they had become very close during their time on Muir Island. To be helpless to help her recover was almost more than he could bear. But at the same time, to be expected to 'explain' why she was raped and tortured wasn't something he was sure he could do either. And as ashamed as he was to admit it, he didn't know if he had that kind of strength.  
  
-Perhaps...-Kurt, for a moment, considered 'losing track of time' in the danger room. That way, he would have an excuse not to see Rahne...but he dismissed the thought just as quickly.  
  
-Rahne is my friend, and I well not abandon her in her time of need, regardless of how uncomfortable it will make me - He thought to himself, disgusted with the idea of avoiding Rahne.  
  
Nightcrawler quickly flipped down thru the bars and smashed his foot into the control panel, ending the program. He decided that instead of wasting his time working out, he decided that he would take a quick shower, meet Jean and Rahne, and have a good time. As the doors to the danger room opened, he was shocked to see Rahne and Jean, with a picnic basket in hand, standing outside.  
  
"I thought the picnic was scheduled for later, mien friends. Am I late?" Kurt asked, concerned. How could he lose track of time?  
  
"It started to rain, and so the professor suggested that we use the danger room." Jean explained.  
  
"Oh." Kurt noticed that Rahne was hanging back, slightly behind Jean. Jean noticed that too, and she pushed Rahne forward a little.  
  
"It's good to see you again, Rahne." Kurt said. Kurt with considerable effort, prevented himself from physically reaching out to her. He knew how she would react, and he certainly didn't want that.  
  
"'Tis...good tae see ye tae." Rahne replied, "How... have ye been?"  
  
-Going mad with worry about your welfare- He thought, "I am an X-Man. I've been busy hitting things and blowing them up."  
  
Both Rahne and Kurt enjoyed an awkward laugh at the joke. While they were laughing, Jean went over the controls and programmed the danger room to create a beautiful, sunny landscape.  
  
"That reminds me, Rahne, have I ever told you about the time when I fought Arcade to save the life of a European princess?"  
  
-Only aboot a million times- Rahne thought to herself, "Nae, ne'er."  
  
"Well, it was quite an adventure, believe me..."  
  
***  
  
Later,  
  
"I cannae believe I ate so much at dinner!"  
  
"Well, everyone gets hungry every once and a while, Rahne." Dani said as she tucked her friend in, "Don't let it bother you none".  
  
"And everyone was too happy to see you to notice how much you ate, Rahne."  
  
"An' even one was surprised that I was smilin', I wager." Rahne replied.  
  
"Well, to be honest, yeah. I surprised at how well you reacted to that treatment, Rahne."  
  
"I know what ye mean. And... I'm nae gonna lie t' ye, Dani, I know that I'll ne'er forget what happened t' me. Whit they did tae me..." Rahne paused for a moment, "but, thanks t' that formula, I feel I have the strength t' reclaim muh life. Adversity is nothin' new tae me, after all. I feel now that I ken face it, now that I don' have t' face whit they did tae me every day of muh life."  
  
"And we'll be here every step of the way to help you." Dani said as she ran her hand thru Rahne's hair. She stood up to leave...  
  
"Dani?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Ye... ken turn off the lights. I... think I ken handle it."  
  
"You sure?"  
  
"I'm sure."  
  
Dani turned off the lights and waited a moment, to see if Rahne would have a panic attack and need them turned back on. But that didn't happen. She waited there a few moments before she realized that Rahne had already fallen asleep.  
  
"No nightmares." Jean whispered.  
  
"Huh? How can you tell? I doubt she's anywhere near R.E.M sleep."  
  
"She isn't. But for a telepath, there are certain tell tale signs that nightmares are developing. And I don't sense any of them in her."  
  
"Well, lets not wake her up."  
  
Once the two women were outside, they both took a deep sigh of relief.  
  
"There is a god!" Dani exclaimed.  
  
"Ever think you that you would see that again? Rahne smiling?"  
  
"Honestly, Jean? Not in my wildest dreams, and now...it's the greatest thing I have ever seen."  
  
"Well, I'm glad Rahne finally received a miracle after everything she's been thru. I can't think of anyone who deserves it more."  
  
"Agreed. I'll have to talk to you later, Jean. I need to meet Cecelia in the medi-lab about something."  
  
"About what?"  
  
"Something." Moonstar said, deliberately being as vague as possible.  
  
"Umm, okay. I need to talk to the professor about some curriculum changes and then I'll probably turn in."  
  
***  
  
-This stuff is so over my head- Cecelia Reyes thought to herself as the reviewed data gathered from Rahne's recovery. Try as she might, she couldn't understand how Rahne's nerves repaired themselves, how her body 'recognized' the fact that she was missing several internal organs, let alone grow the stem cells needed to regrow them.  
  
"What's up, Doc?"  
  
"I can't tell you how much I hate that joke, Dani. Bobby already ran it into the ground the second day I was here." Cecelia said, "You said you wanted to talk to me about Rahne?"  
  
"Yeah. A few days ago, you guys told me that you couldn't use the Shi'ar tech around here to completely heal Rahne. Now she's healed. Completely. So, what changed?"  
  
"You got me Dani, you need to ask Hank. He's the one who came up with that 'Pancura' formula that healed Rahne."  
  
"I tried that, but he's sealed himself in his lab. Rahne went by there earlier to thank him, but even then he wouldn't come out. But I have a question for you; you recorded all the data on what that formula did, right? You told me that the first guy who received it had a piece of bone in his lungs, right?"  
  
"That's correct, why do you ask?"  
  
"What happened to that bone in his lungs? That couldn't have been healthy."  
  
"I'm not sure, but I could check the recordings and find out."  
  
As Cecelia called up the file, Dani thought about the implications of what she was implying. If she was wrong, than she would apologize to Hank, even though no one knew what she was thinking. But if she was right, there would be hell to pay...  
  
"Here we go. Apparently, his body somehow released a chemical that could break down the bone that was in his lung, just dissolving it in seconds. Somehow, it could discriminate between bones that were properly set and bones, or in this case bone fragments, that weren't where they were supposed to be."  
  
"Have you ever seen something like this before?"  
  
"You know, that's odd, I have. When I examined Marrow, I discovered that her body could release a chemical that did exactly that. It's basically what kept her alive for most of her life, what with the various bone fragments that would break off whenever she moved the wrong way. But of course it only worked for her."  
  
"Quick question about those who have taken the formula thus far. Were they healed or transformed?"  
  
"Excuse me? What do you mean?"  
  
"Did their body's heal at an advanced rate, or did their bodies 'transform' into a healed state?"  
  
"Well, it's a little bit of both but I guess they transformed for the most part. The first patient lost all his earlier scars and even regained his tonsils, Jono transformed back into a human form, and Rahne's recovery violated just about everything I ever learned in med school. As best as I can tell, this formula not only transforms them into a healthy human being, but it gives them a healing factor akin to Logan's, but with no side effects, like turning into a berserker runt. "  
  
When Cecelia said that, Dani's eyes narrowed and her heart raced. That fucking bastard...  
  
"So this formula combines attributes of Rahne, Marrow and healing factors in general. Am I the only one who sees something wrong here?" She growled.  
  
"Not... really, Dani, what are you implying?"  
  
"I should think it's obvious, but I'll spell it out for you." Dani spat, " Marrow's body can release a chemical that somehow found it's way into this 'pancura' formula. Rahne can transform. They both have healing factors. They were both kidnapped, raped and tortured by the same men. So were Feral, Jack Flag and Wildchild, all of whom had some kind of healing factor. And now, somehow, their powers have found their way into Hank's formula. What's more, you told me that Rahne transformed while that formula healed her, like it somehow activated her powers. According the Rahne, the formula also strengthened her change form, almost as if the formula complimented her powers. Now what does that tell you?"  
  
"Oh...my...lord," Cecelia said as the truth dawned on her, what Hank had done, "I'm sure he...he has some kind of explanation...or..."  
  
"He damn well better." Dani growled.  
  
Cecelia pressed the comm. button and called Hank, hoping that Dani was wrong and he had some kind of rational explanation.  
  
"McCoy, could you come out of your lab and to the medi-lab for a second? We need to talk about something."  
  
"I'm afraid that I'm too busy at the moment to conference with you now." He replied.  
  
"I'll bet." Dani said as she stalked off towards his lab. Cecelia unsure of what to do, pressed the comm. unit again and called the professor.  
  
*** 


	14. Confessions

A few minutes earlier…  
  
" In one bold step, I have become an accessory to murder and torture." Hank McCoy, A.K.A the Beast, said aloud, to no one in particular. His actions had been bothering him tremendously; so much so that he felt it was best just to confess to the walls of his private lab. The doors were sealed with five inches of titanium steel, so interruption wasn't very likely.  
  
" What's more, I am an accessory to the rape, torture and molestation of the daughter of my closest associates, Dr. Moira MacTaggart. I knew full well what those doctors had done to Rahne. After all, I treated her when she was brought to the mansion. How they tortured her, how she was made to suffer during her captivity and her eventually escape. How they had killed everyone else they had taken slowly, how in the name of science, they tortured hundreds of innocent men and women. And knowing that, still I examined the data. It was then and there I became a party to murder, and far to many other crimes to list. Crimes that would even put Dr. Mengela to shame. And the most damning and baffling thing of all is, that I think I can live with that."  
  
Hank took off his glasses and rubbed his sore eyes. He hadn't been getting enough sleep, and he didn't expect that to change anytime soon.  
  
"I told myself, and others at first that I was simply looking the information over to help Rahne. But I know now that was a lie. I knew it then that it was a lie. I saw the potential in the information the first time I glanced over it. How could I not? A first year med-student would have seen the exact same thing. The data was little more than a puzzle that was easy, far to easy, to put together. And in doing so, I have created something that can save the lives of millions. And all it really cost me, was my soul."  
  
The comm. unit buzzed. The comm. unit identified the caller as Cecelia Reyes.  
  
"McCoy, could you come out of your lab and to the medi-lab for a second? We need to talk about something."  
  
  
  
" I'm afraid that I'm too busy at the moment to conference with you now."–They know. Somehow, that thought is so very relieving- He thought to himself.  
  
Hank waited a few minutes for what he knew what was to come next  
  
-Boom!-  
  
In a flash, the locked doors to his lab had been blown apart, and in the dust was standing one very pissed mutant.  
  
" Direction explosives with the power of C4. Most impressive use of your ability to create solid mirages, Dani. Did you learn that with S.H.I.E.L.D or X-Force?"  
  
" Don't be coy with me, you blue fucking furball! I know what you did! You used the data those bastards gathered from dissecting Rahne and the others to make that pancura formula!"  
  
" That is correct."  
  
" Despite the fact that all that data is drenched in innocent blood!? That they tortured and killed innocent men and women to get it?" Dani snarled as she advanced on Hank, " What kind of doctor are you?"  
  
" A human one, thus fallible." Hank replied. Enraged, Dani hit him square in the jaw with all her strength, nearly dislocating it despite her inferior strength.  
  
" I learned that in X-Force!" She yelled.  
  
" Feel better now?"  
  
" No, I don't! How could you even think about using that data? Do you have any idea how Rahne suffered because of those bastards? Do you? Her first experience with sex was RAPE! They_held_her_down_and_gang-raped_her for hours, laughing the entire time! I doubt you could even begin to understand how horrible that was for her! And that's not even the worst of it! They ripped her fingernails off and then forced her to shift into wolf form so they could do it again! They repeatedly dipped her in freezing cold water so they could study hypothermia! Torture doesn't even come close to describing what happened to her, how she suffered! Do you know how she would have flash backs of what they did to her if she saw the smallest reminder of what she lived thru!?"  
  
" I do! As I recall, I told you about the possibility of them happening and how to help her when they did occur! And don't you want something good to come of what happened to her?"  
  
" Is that why you lied to her, to us? Saying that you used the crap we have around here to fix her when it was really because of those fuckers who dissected her? Because you thought you were doing the right thing? That's bullshit and you know it!"  
  
" Good tae come of whit? Lie tae who?" A voice asked innocently. Hank and Dani looked towards the destroyed door and saw Rahne standing there, with her hands behind her back innocently.  
  
-Oh dear god no- Dani thought, " Rahne, what…what are you doing here? I thought you went to bed…"  
  
" I was goin' tae, but… somethin' woke me up an', I remembered that I dinnae thank Hank fer whit he did fer me. Creating the 'pancura' formula, I mean. He was cooped up in his lab all day, an' I hoped tae thank 'im before he went tae bed. But… why are muh friends fightin' each other? What this all aboot?"  
  
Dani opened her mouth to explain, to tell her how Hank used the data the doctors who had tortured had gathered from her body, but her mouth just went dry. She couldn't do it.  
  
" The pancura formula was created solely using the data… gathered thru Dr. Calvin's work, Rahne. That's… what we were fighting about." Hank explained. When he said that, Rahne looked at Hank, truly confused. He didn't…  
  
" Ye mean, it wasnae the Shi'ar technology that gave me muh life back, but it was thanks tae the doctors who raped an' mutilated muh body?"  
  
" Their… work was essential to its creation, yes."  
  
" Work? Work! Ye have a queer way o' describin' rape, murder an' torture, McCoy!" Rahne screamed as she shifted fully into her wolf form and flashed her claws, " How would ye like tae see muh work?!"  
  
Rahne leaped at Hank, intent on ripping his throat out with her bare hands just before she would tear his head off. But Hank leaped back and Dani ducked under Rahne's lunge and grabbed Rahne's foot, sending her crashing to the ground. Dani quickly placed her knee on the small of Rahne's back and twisted Rahne's arms behind her, pinning her despite Rahne's greater strength.  
  
" Let me up, Dani! I'm goin' tae kill him!" Rahne bucked to the side, dislodging Dani, but by the time Rahne had jumped to her feet, Dani had placed herself between her and Hank.  
  
" Get out of muh way, Dani." Rahne snarled as she bared her fangs and drooled slightly. She was deadly serious, " Or I'll go thru ye!"  
  
" I'm not letting you do something you'll regret later, Rahne. Put it in park." Dani said as she summoned her psychic bow and arrows. The irony that she was now defending a man who she was more than willing to assault a minute ago, didn't escape her.  
  
" Get oot of muh way!"  
  
" No."  
  
" Ye don' have any right tae stop me! After whit they did tae me…how I suffered…an' tae be indebted to those bastards like this…If yuir truly muh friend, ye will stand aside an' let do what needs tae be done!" Rahne growled.  
  
" I am your friend, so that gives me the right. I'm every bit a pissed about this as you are, but that's no excuse to kill him. Now, put it in park!"  
  
Rahne stood there for a moment, staring eye to eye with Dani. She wanted Hank's blood more than anything in the world now, but she wasn't sure she wanted to spill the blood of her closest friend to get it. Seconds seemed to stretch into hours, years until finally…  
  
" Fine! Have it yuir way!"  
  
Rahne changed back to her human form and with tears in her eyes, looked towards Hank.  
  
"Mum tol' me once that ye were a good man, Hank, o' honor an' integrity. One of the greatest men she had e'er had the pleasure tae know an' call a friend. I see now that she was sorely mistakin'!"  
  
Those words cut Hank to his very soul, and he tried to mouth an explanation, explain why he felt he had a duty to use the data, but he couldn't find the words. And with that comment, Rahne changed into her wolf form and ran out of the room, unable to bear the sight of the man who had violated her body and trust.  
  
" Look McCoy, I need to chase her down before she does anything stupid. I suggest that you go confess to the Professor and burn all your data by the time I get back." Dani hissed.  
  
  
  
***  
  
Rahne ran out of the mansion as fast as her wolf form would carry her. She couldn't accept that the men who had raped and tortured her for three straight months, men whom she was never able to defy or thwart in any way; were now responsible for giving her her life back. And so she ran into the woods surrounding the mansion and just kept running. For a time, it was all she could do to keep from thinking about it. After about an hour of running, Rahne slowed down and realized that in her haste, she had become completely lost.  
  
-Brilliant, jus' brilliant- She thought to herself as she looked around in the thick woods, trying to get her bearings. She used to know the woods around the mansion like the back of her hand, but that seemed like a lifetime ago.  
  
*You're not lost, Rahne, just keep going north like you were doing. I've been waiting here for you for a while* Dani said over their psi-link, startling Rahne. She hadn't even noticed that the link was on.  
  
* Dani? What are ye talkin' aboot? I don' even know where I'm goin', so how ken ye?* Rahne replied.  
  
*Because I do. You're about a half-mile away from where you were running to*  
  
Rahne, though confused by what Dani was talking about, did as she was asked. Soon Rahne had caught Dani's scent; she noticed she was standing in a gravel parking lot. Of a church. The same one she attended with Sam while she was a member of the New Mutants.  
  
" I'm that predictable, huh?" She asked as she shifted back to her human form and approached Dani.  
  
" Well, I prefer to think of it as consistent. You were raised by a reverend, Rahne. Granted, he was a very hateful and bitter man, but where else would you run to? It's not exactly rocket science."  
  
" So are ye goin' tae lecture me aboot losin' muh temper, or how I shid forgive Hank f'r making me a party tae muh own rape and torture? Ye ken save yuir breath, Dani."  
  
" You know me better than that, Rahne. And I'm every bit as angry with Hank as you are. Hell, I was going to beat him up myself until you got there."  
  
" So, why are ye here? I ken take care of muh self jus' fine."  
  
" Maybe, but I don't see any need to risk it."  
  
"Thanks. So…"  
  
"So what?"  
  
" So, are ye goin' tae ask me?"  
  
" Ask you what?"  
  
" If I would have taken the formula, if I knew where it really came from."  
  
" The thought had crossed my mind, yes. Do you think you would have taken it?"  
  
" I…don' know, Dani. I mean, ye know how I took it when I found out I couldnae hae children, how hard it was f'r me tae have tae use crutches, an' how hard it was f'r me tae get up everyday because I was always tired an' sore, an' how that formula saved me. F'r the first time since the X-Men saved me, I had hope, Dani. Hope that I could put everythin' behind me. Hope that I ken live the life I wanted. Now…"  
  
" Yeah?"  
  
" I'm nae goin' tae lie tae ye, Dani. I dinnae think I could. I don' want whit I lived thru tae be f'r nothin'. When Mum died, it…it was a lot easier to bear, nae only because I knew she was dyin' but because her death helped save millions o' lives. Her death wasn't f'r nothin'. It mattered. An' I always believe in 'hate the sin and love the sinner' with all muh heart, but…"  
  
" But?"  
  
Tears came to Rahne's eyes as she recognized that she now owed the men who violated her an incredible debt, one she could never repay, even if she wanted to.  
  
" But if Hank gives the world his pancura formula, then he… makes… them… right! What they did tae me, how they killed an' tortured innocent souls, no one's going tae even care, Dani, I know it. In muh heart o' hearts, I know it. My…our pain an' suffering will jus' be a footnote… aboot the greatest medical discovery e'er! It means those men who raped; molested and mutilated me an' countless others… will be vindicated by history! And what aboot the next disease they need tae cure after that? They might be tempted jus' to strip people o' their human rights, because after all, it worked the first time! I…I jus' don' know what tae think, Dani."  
  
" We could lie about it, Rahne. Say that it was discovered some other way, you know. What about that?"  
  
" The truth always matters, Dani." Rahne said forcefully, " Don' kid yuirself otherwise. I dinnae live thru a lie or dream, I lived thru hell. Barely"  
  
" I know, Rahne, believe me I know."  
  
" Dani?"  
  
" Yes?"  
  
" Would ye have taken it, if ye were in muh place? Knowin' where it came from?"  
  
" Never."  
  
" If ye knew where it came from, would ye have lied tae me aboot it an' given it tae me?"  
  
" Honestly, Rahne? Without a second thought."  
  
" I…see."  
  
"Look, why don't we worry about this tomorrow? It's late at night, we're both tired and this thing will keep. How about we head back to the mansion, get a good night's sleep, and deal with this problem in the morning."  
  
" I may as well, I guess. I'm beat from runnin' thru the woods…wait a minute, how did ye get here before me?"  
  
" I knew that you would head towards the church you always attended when you were in the New Mutants, like I said." Dani said as she walked into the parking lot.  
  
" But how did ye get here so fast? I ken leave ye in the dust in muh wolf form, an' I don' see any of the vehicles from the garage here."  
  
" That's because I stole Wolverine's bike." Dani said matter of factly. She then got on the Harley that she had hidden in the shadows and started it up, revealing it to Rahne, " It helps when you can create solid mirages of anything you might need, like a key."  
  
" WHAT? Ye daft, woman! Wolverine! He'll kill ye!"  
  
" Nah, I just got a sense of style, and he won't mind. Come on, we'll be back home in a snap!" Dani smirked.  
  
" Ye have a death wish, tae." Rahne muttered under her breath as she climbed on back. Dani revved the engine, and headed back to the mansion. At a 100 miles per hour, of course.  
  
***  
  
Xaiver's Study.  
  
" I can't believe you did something like this, Hank!" Jean shouted, " In all the years I've known you, I never thought you could do something so outrageous! You know what those monsters did to her!"  
  
" Not that I agree what he did, Jean, but it was because of him Rahne has her life back." Cecelia said. She didn't agree with what Hank had done, but the harm was already done.  
  
" That still doesn't make it right! She had a right to know!"  
  
" Jean, I know you're mad but…"  
  
" That's alright, Cecelia," Hank interrupted, " I am more than capable of defending myself. I fully recognize that I bent certain ethical rules when I utilized the data in the fashion that I did, but I felt that I did what I had to for the greater good! I'm sorry you can't see that, Jean but I did what I had too."  
  
" What you had to? That's the weakest excuse to ever come out of your lips in the ten years I've known you! You didn't bend the rules, you knowing broke them ignoring any consequences!"  
  
" And yourself?"  
  
" Excuse me?"  
  
" Immediately after you rescued Rahne, you copied and 'downloaded' all my medical knowledge into yourself without even asking my permission, though I would have given it freely! Isn't that a breach of ethics? And don't tell me you haven't been tempted to reach into Rahne's mind and erase the memory of what they did to her if you thought that would help her. Sometimes, we have to bend the rules to help people!"  
  
" …"  
  
" Well, am I right?"  
  
" Not in the least! That was different! There was an immediate need! You and Cecelia couldn't have possibly saved her if I hadn't done that!"  
  
" There is still an immediate need for this information all over the world…"  
  
"And how many will be killed if…"  
  
*Enough!* Professor X said forcefully with his telepathy, ending the conversation. "Jean, I understand your emotional investment in this, but Hank had barely begun to explain himself before your…out burst. Let's hear Hank out before we jump to conclusions, shall we?"  
  
It was more of an order that a request. Jean reluctantly reined her outrage in, out of respect for her long time mentor.  
  
"I believe you were just explaining how this 'pancura' formula works, weren't you Hank? Please, continue."  
  
" Thank you, Professor. The pancura formula works by stimulating certain genes possessed by everyone in the gene pool. Whether they are latent mutant genes in humans or excess genes in mutants, I haven't been able to fully tell yet. Regardless, the pancura formula works to 'transform' anyone, human or mutant, into a fully healed person within a matter of seconds. Nerves are healed, scars are made to disappear and it can fully heal organs within seconds."  
  
" I see. How many times can it be used?"  
  
" Twice, at the absolute most. After that, the genes that it utilizes become unresponsive according to every computer simulation, but that's really more than enough. Since it heals nerves, we might be able to reverse engineer how to completely heal them WITHOUT the formula. And whereas it may not be able to fully heal a cancer patient, it would certainly give him years of life, and possibly reveal to doctors how to fully heal him. What's more, the disk given to me contains medical information that could potentially put us ten years future of medical history at the very least."  
  
" I see. Well…"  
  
" Yes?"  
  
" I think it would be wise to table discussion about this for tomorrow morning, and let the senior staff discuss and decide on what should be done about it."  
  
" What?" Jean fumed, " How can you even suggest that? This shouldn't even be a topic for discussion! That formula is drenched in innocent blood!"  
  
"Normally, I would agree. But this subject is something that we have a duty to approach with caution and an open mind. One way or another, millions of lives are in our hands now, and we need to act responsibly." 


	15. The Great debate

***  
  
-I so do not want to do this-Chamber thought to himself as he dragged himself out of bed. Chamber, along with every other member of the senior staff, had been informed of Dr. Hank McCoy's actions regarding the data collected from torturing all those people. Although Chamber barely knew Rahne, he felt sick to his stomach when he learned that he had his face back thanks to those monsters that he helped take down. And the fact that he had just drunk an entire six-pack by himself didn't help matters much either.  
  
- A body has to make up for lost time, after all- He joked to himself. He quickly got dressed and headed down to the sub basement where the meeting was supposed to take place. When he arrived, he saw that everyone else had already been there waiting for him. Rahne was flanked by Moonstar and Jean, while Hank and Wolverine were staring each other down, and everyone else, from Stacy-X to Angel, was just acting restless and deeply annoyed.  
  
"Uhhh, I'm not late, am I mates?"  
  
" Not at all, Jono. You're right on time. The rest of us simply arrived early. Please, take a seat."  
  
As Jono sat down, he could feel the tension in the room.  
  
" As we all know, we are here to decide what to do with Hank's pancura formula. We now know that it's creation was solely the result of the horrible experiments performed by Dr. Calvin on not just Rahne, but on countless other innocent victims. The matter before us today is what exactly to do with the material."  
  
" What's there to think about, really?" Stacy-X asked, " We should just use it. I mean, those people are going to stay dead, why not make their deaths mean something?"  
  
" That it's okay to butcher innocent people so long as yer hearts in the right place? That's a great message to send!" Logan growled.  
  
" So we act like nothing happened? How does that help anyone?" Emma asked. And with that, the entire group, with the exception of Rahne, broke out into argument.  
  
"…History has shown what happens when the ends justify the means! Iran anyone?"  
  
"…This won't bring them back, but it will give their deaths meaning!"  
  
"…This is spitting in the face of everyone they killed!"  
  
"…Sometimes the needs of the many…"  
  
"…You motherless little…"  
  
"…Kindly self fornicate, will you, my dear?"  
  
* That will be enough!* Everyone, again with the exception of Rahne, clutched their heads in pain as Professor X 'shouted' at them via his powers. He allowed them a moment to gather themselves before he continued.  
  
" I had hoped that we could have calmly discussed this matter in a mature fashion, but I see that is not to be. It seems we all have our demons to wrest with. I suggest that we adjourn the meeting for now and meet back here later, and vote then."  
  
Everyone silently nodded in agreement and filed out. Jean and Dani stayed at Rahne's side, warding off any potential questions.  
  
-They already know full well what happened to her-Jean thought to herself, -I'm not about to let them quiz her on it-  
  
" I cannae believe it's come tae this. Havin' tae decide what's more important, savin' the livin' or honoring the dead." Rahne said dejectedly.  
  
" I think we can do both here, Rahne. Look, I know it's hard, but just vote how you think is best. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone."  
  
" Rahne, why don't we go down to the pool and relax there?"  
  
" I…dinnae think that would be a good idea, Dani…"  
  
" Come on, Rahne, it'll be relaxing."  
  
"I… Alright."  
  
" You two have fun, I need to take care of some business upstairs."  
  
Rahne was too depressed to question why Jean would leave her now, but Dani wasn't.  
  
* Can't it wait? I think Rahne's more important right now than some errand.* She said to Jean telepathically.  
  
* I'm going to try to drum up support for our side, so what happened to Rahne won't happen to anyone else* Jean replied.  
  
* With your powers, you don't have to argue, you know.*  
  
* I'll pretend I didn't hear that, Dani.* Jean replied as she left.  
  
  
  
***  
  
X-Men Rec Room.  
  
" I gave that disk to you in good faith McCoy, and you broke it!" Logan growled with his claws extended, but at his side just to intimidate Hank. Hank barely noticed or cared.  
  
" You gave me that disk so that I could help Rahne and I did just that! I see no reason for that information to only help Rahne!"  
  
" Well, for one thing, she is the only one who they tortured who is still alive and for another, how about the thousands they killed?"  
  
" Thousands? Your report made mention of a mass grave, but that couldn't possibly have held thousands…"  
  
" Damn straight it couldn't. They kidnapped victims from all over the globe, an' when they killed them experimentin' on them, they shoved their corpses into ovens. They broke down shortly before we got there, that's why we found that mass grave. It's impossible to determine how many they killed before we stopped 'em."  
  
" All the more reason not to let this information go to waste!"  
  
" Why, so you can validate murderers?" Logan started to approach, but Bobby, who had just entered the room with Stacy-X, quickly got between the two.  
  
" Let's calm down a little, guys. Mutant combat is a little cliché' here, don't you think?"  
  
" I can't believe you're making jokes at a time like this Drake! They killed Marrow to get that data!"  
  
" Her name was Sarah, you sawed-off maniac! And what do you care?" Bobby snapped.  
  
" She was an X-Man, I cared plenty!"  
  
" I really doubt that, Logan." Bobby sneered.  
  
" Oh, and you did?"  
  
" Yes I did! I tried to make her feel welcomed! I helped her fill out her registration form for college and helped her pick out classes! And that's why this is so hard for me!"  
  
" What's so hard about making sure she gets justice?"  
  
"Justice? Is that what you call throwing away one of the greatest medical discovery in the history of man?" Hank interrupted.  
  
" It's hard," Bobby said, " Because Callisto was right. Sarah's death didn't matter. She had a future in front of her. A good one. She actually wanted to write children's books, did you know that Logan?"  
  
" No, not really."  
  
" Of course you didn't," Bobby spat, " You were too busy beating her up or giving her lip. She wanted to write children's books so no kid would have to live thru the misery she did. So they could enjoy the happiness she never did. And she'll never be able to realize her dream now. And any hope that she would be remembered by the world, as anything other than some random mutant, is gone now. If her death can help others, I think maybe…maybe we should use it."  
  
" Do you want to make those murderer's right?" Logan asked.  
  
" No, I want their deaths to matter, since their lives no longer can." He replied.  
  
  
  
***  
  
" Come on, Rahne, the water's just fine." Dani said as she tried coaxing her friend into the pool, leading her by the hands.  
  
" I…I'm nae sure aboot this. It's very… cold." Rahne said fearfully. She tried hard to be brave, but the farther she walked down the ramp into the pool, the more she was reminded of how the doctor's who experimented on her would strap her down to a metal gurney and dip her in ice cold water up to her neck, simply to induce hypothermia. How she could feel her life draining away, inch by painful inch. And the feeling was getting worse and worse the farther she walked into the pool.  
  
" It's okay Rahne. I'm here, there's nothing to be afraid of." Dani said reassuringly. Rahne nevertheless pulled away from her and quickly got out of the pool.  
  
" I'm sorry, Dani. It's…jus'…I cannae do it. I'm tae scared." She said, ashamed. To be afraid of water, of all things…  
  
" I understand. And don't sweat it none, Rahne. Recovery is a slow thing. Why don't you just sit on the side and just put your legs in? It might help some." Dani suggested.  
  
" Alright. Dani, I know this is a silly question, but why are ye so mad at Hank? Ye said yuirself that ye would hae given me the formula yuirself wit' out telling me the truth aboot it. An' the more I think aboot it, the more I have a hard time bein' mad at Hank. I mean, he did whit he did tae help people."  
  
" I had some more time to think about it last night. And I would be more than willing to kill Dr. Calvin's great grand parents to spare you the horror of what you lived thru, Rahne. That certainly doesn't make it right."  
  
" That's nae an answer, Dani."  
  
" Sorry…it's complicated. I don't know if you would really understand."  
  
" Well, I thought everyone f'r sure would think less o' me when they learned that I was raped. I thought they would look down at me f'r bringin' a such shame tae muh self. I ne'er thought that anyone would understand, Dani. I was wrong, ye know."  
  
-Guilt trip. She must have picked that up from me. Should I be proud or ashamed?- Dani thought to herself. " Okay, I'll give it a shot. I thought all about it last night. Hell, I could barely get to sleep. You know the general history of what happened to my ancestors, to all Native Americans, right?"  
  
" Ye mean how they lost their lands tae the settlers an' such? Aye, who doesn't?"  
  
" They, we, didn't just lose our lands Rahne. We lost our homes and were moved to and confined to lands that weren't worth a damn for the rest of our lives and our children's lives. In our own country, by men who we first welcomed here with open arms no less. And when it was discovered that sometimes the land held gold, it was taken from us, just like before. We were driven off so that the white man could mine it and profit from it while we were left with nothing but dust. And that wasn't the worst of it."  
  
As Dani explained her reasoning, Rahne could sense her friend getting angrier and angrier.  
  
"They tried to take away or erase our very culture, our way of life. Indian children were often taken away from their 'pagan' parents and placed in Christian schools where they were taught that everything their parents had taught them was wrong, that their parents were bound for hell and only they could save them. Needless to say, it created a rift between generations that still exists today and has caused disease and alcoholism to rip thru what little remains of our people. We've become an endangered species in our own home land!"  
  
" Muh heart goes out tae ye, Dani, but whit does this have tae do wit' the formula, an' information?"  
  
" Because for every time my people were victimized because of the white man, other white men would then say 'never again'. Every time. They would get outraged, object and promise us that they would never tolerate something like this again. Of course, they would never give us back what was ours by birthright, and would then preceded to victimize us again. Hell, recently tribes in the mid west were recently denied the right to perform an age olds spiritual practice by the Supreme Court because they used peyote as a part of it. And no one in this country really seemed to care that they had just been denied a part of their culture that was older than this country, either."  
  
" But, Dani, this information ken help people…"  
  
" I know, Rahne I know. But in the grand scheme of things, that's not important here. I'm sure that if the world gets this information and uses it, they will swear, 'never again'. They will promise that they would never condone torture and never allow something like this to happen again. That the measures they will adopt will stop something like this from ever happening again. But why should I believe them, when they have never kept the promise of 'never again' to my people? What happens when the next man who thinks he's doing the world a favor by doing the exact same thing that Calvin did? He'll know what his work will be rewarded, that even though he will be despised for all history, he will still be remembered for how he 'helped' science. That's cold comfort to his victims who won't even be remembered by name."  
  
" But…"  
  
" Look at it this way, Rahne. Do you want anyone else to live thru what you did?"  
  
" Of course nae, Dani! I wouldnae wish that on muh worst enemy! How ken ye ask such a thing?"  
  
"Because that's exactly what will happen if we let this stand, Rahne. We stop this here and now, or matters will only get worse. Make no mistake about it. You don't have to be a history major to know that."  
  
  
  
***  
  
-It's so beautiful up here, no wonder he comes up here so often- Jean thought to herself as she soared thru the clouds using her incredible telekinetic powers. She was looking for an old friend, but couldn't help but take in the sights. Everything below seemed so insignificant… so simple.  
  
" Come here often, good looking?" A voice said from above. Warren Worthington the Third swooped down and circled Jean twice.  
  
" Just when I want to talk to high flying, handsome blue boys."  
  
" And let me guess, you want to talk about my vote?"  
  
"I guess I can be a little transparent sometimes, but yes. How do you intend to vote?"  
  
" I should think it's obvious. We should use the formula to heal those in need. It's the same reason that I haven't retracted my statement about Calvin in the Daily Bugle, even though his actions sicken me. We need to look at the big picture here."  
  
" The big picture?" Jean asked.  
  
" Yes, the big picture. This thing was basically a conspiracy of one. Calvin will be despised for the rest of history; the U.N and the U.S will take every precaution to see to it that this never happens again and I'm sure no doctor would want to go to jail for the rest of his life for repeating what Calvin did, so why not allow that information to help people?"  
  
" And that's the big picture to you?"  
  
" Yes. Try to ignore your feelings for a moment and look at the facts. People are dying, and we can help them. But you don't want to because you think it would make the people who hurt Rahne right. Or as Jason Medwid put it, 'your rights end where my feelings begin'."  
  
"And that's the big picture to you, Warren? Overlooking, of course, that democracy is about minority rights with majority rule."  
  
" I wouldn't put it quite like that, but yes."  
  
" Then you aren't looking hard enough. This isn't about helping others; it's about the first domino! Yes, Calvin did what he did by himself and using his own resources. But that's just because he was the first to have the idea. If we release this information, you can be assured that others will follow in his footsteps. Companies that are desperate for cash or just greedy enough, will set up shop in some poor country, bribe the local officials, and do whatever the hell they please!"  
  
" You can't honestly believe that!"  
  
" Why not? Most pharmacological companies have already moved the majority of their live trials overseas because American standards on live human experimentation were too 'strict'. Greed is pretty damn powerful, after all. We've already seen Diamond companies help fuel civil wars in Africa just to make a few more millions! We've seen car companies use slave labor in the past too! Hell, we all know how compassionate H.M.O's can be, and they are supposed to help people!"  
  
" Private companies have to answer to the public, Jean. You know that!"  
  
"Only if they are found out. Enron never had to explain it's accounting until everything had already gone to hell. And that's just private companies. What about countries that don't answer to anyone at all? As I recall, Saddam Hussein was more than willing to test out his chemical weaponry on his own citizens! Who knows what will happen, what he will do if he gets the idea to start medical experiments on those who disagree with him! And what about China? They forcibly sterilize women to control the population! They also kill political prisoners and sell their organs. Would dissecting political prisoners be that far off if they realized they could get something out of it? And the U.N would do NOTHING to stop them… because they really can't do anything. Do you think that will change when the leaders in China get the idea to start performing medical experiments on anyone who crosses the government? I certainly don't!"  
  
" The citizens won't allow something like that, Jean, don't be so pessimistic!"  
  
" Oh? Parents in Bangkok sell their own children into slavery! Orphanages in Asia, all over the world, are overrun with unwanted children that are a burden on the local government. And let's not forget mental patients, the poor and unemployed! There are more than enough potential future victims out there, Warren. If you can't see that, then you just aren't looking hard enough!"  
  
Jean turned to leave…  
  
" Oh Warren? Something you should remember about all of what happened to Rahne. Her_right's_ended when Dr. Calvin, your friend," Jean said, her voice filled with venom, " felt it was right to begin inhuman experiments on innocent victims! If we let that information be released, the blood of every future victim will be on our hands!"  
  
" And what about those dying right now while we debate this? What about their lives?"  
  
" Unfortunately, they die! If you're looking for easy answers, Warren, you should never have joined the human race! Rahne, Sarah, Kyle, they weren't volunteers who willingly gave their lives to help others! They were kidnapped off the street, tortured and killed because of Calvin thought it would be best for humanity! No one has the right to play god like that! No one! Rahne, Kyle, Sarah and every other person they tortured, raped and killed have nothing whatsoever to do with making the world sick! By your reasoning, if a group of people were dying because they needed an organ transplant, it would be perfectly all right to kill another man and take his organs for transplant. That's exactly what will happen when we let the rights of the many outweigh the rights of the few!"  
  
And with that, Jean left Warren to contemplate his decision.  
  
***  
  
Lakeside  
  
" What are your thoughts on this whole sordid affair, mien friends?" Kurt asked Chamber and Cecelia Reyes.  
  
" I'm not really sure what to think mates. I mean, yeah, they gained this information thru torture, but if it can be used to help others, shouldn't it?" Jono asked.  
  
" Yes, but wouldn't that say to the world that it is alright to torture people so long as your heart is pure and your goals are just? Wasn't that called the Spanish inquisition?"  
  
" Uhh, you've been awfully quite, Doc, what are your thoughts?" Jono said, trying to deflect the question. The fact that he wasn't certain where he stood in the issue didn't help. One the one hand, the pancura formula was the greatest thing to ever happen to him, giving him his face, and therefore his life, back. But on the other hand, they had killed countless others to get the information in ways too horrible to describe.  
  
" Huh? Excuse me, Jono? What were you saying?"  
  
" I was asking what your opinion on this whole bloody mess is."  
  
" I'm still trying to figure that out myself, really."  
  
" Vas? Are you aware of what those fiends did to her? How she suffered?" Kurt asked angrily.  
  
"Of course I know the hell that Rahne lived thru, Kurt! I'm one of the ones who helped put her back together after those bastards dissected her!"  
  
" So how can you support Hank using the information they obtained by raping her body?"  
  
" That's just it. I don't condone Hank creating the formula, but he did. And since he did what he did, I think we should use it. I mean, I know it's a hard choice but… have you ever looked into the eyes of a man who is dying, how he pleads with you to do something, anything, to save his life when you can do nothing? I don't think I could live with myself if I turned away from something this important."  
  
" Even if it means you are vindicating butchers and sadists? Even if it means you are opening the door to even more abuses in the future?"  
  
" Yes, Kurt. God help me, even if. I see no reason to fear the future."  
  
*** 


	16. And the hard choices

After several hours of soul searching, the team had reconvened in the meeting room to make one of the most important decisions of their careers. Professor X took a moment to address the issue of protocol, before they voted on the issue at hand.  
  
" We are gathered here today on decide whether or not to release Hank's 'pancura formula' to the world at large, taking into it's appalling origins. But, I feel we are looking at a larger issue of whether it is right to use medical information obtained thru torture. I feel that with this issue we should err on the side of caution. Due to the fact that there are fourteen staff members voting on this, we must be prepared for the possibility of a tie. If we do indeed come to a tie on this issue, then we will not release the information to the public. Is that understood?"  
  
" Professor…"  
  
" This point is not up for debate, Hank. This is my home, and as founder of the X-Men, my decision. I say again, should this matter come to a tie, we will not release the information or formula to the public. End of discussion."  
  
" How so very democratic." Emma said, " Since we're on the subject, what is your vote on the issue? Yay or nay?"  
  
" As much as my heart goes out to those who would or could benefit from this information, I feel that using it will ultimately devalue human life as a whole. I feel it would eventually lead to even worse crimes than Dr. Calvin performed. Nay. Scott?"  
  
There wasn't a man or woman in the room who didn't recognize the fact that the Professor had asked Scott his opinion next because he wanted Scott to side with him. Xavier was like a father to Scott, after all, and for the first time in his life, Xavier, consciously or not, was attempting to manipulate that bond.  
  
" I respectfully disagree, Professor. While I don't condone what happened to Rahne and the others, I feel that to turn away from this information would be a bigger crime. Yay."  
  
-How ken he think like that? They violated me every way they could tae get that bloody information, an' they'd do it again, most likely- Rahne thought to herself. Scott's vote in favor of using the information scared Rahne. That was mainly because she wasn't certain of how she felt about the issue now.  
  
" I…see. Logan?"  
  
" Not chance in hell. Even considering using that information is spittin' in the face of everyone they killed." He growled.  
  
-But what if it ken help people?- Rahne thought to herself. She kept playing devil's advocate in her head against her will. For every pro she came up with she immediately came up with a con, and it distressed her greatly. Did she not want the information to be used because she wanted to deny those horrible doctors any victory she could, or because she honestly thought it was wrong?  
  
" Stacy-X?"  
  
" Yay, I guess. Those people aren't coming back from the dead, after all."  
  
-Because they're nae X-men- Rahne thought bitterly to herself. They always seemed to come back from the dead in droves…  
  
" Cecelia?"  
  
" I wish I was strong enough to say that we shouldn't use the information, that its origins are more important than what it can do. But I'm not. I've worked in E.R's, and in hospitals, and I've seen too many times where a patient is figuratively inches from a treatment that could save his life, that maybe if he got sick a few weeks later than he did, then he would still be alive. We need this information today, not tomorrow. Yay."  
  
After Cecelia said that, she couldn't bring herself to look at Rahne. While she felt that she was following her intellect at the expense of her conscious.  
  
" Kurt?"  
  
" As a priest and man of god, I am taught to look for the good in all things and in essence, make the best of a bad situation. That said, I feel that we have already found the good in this formula. Rahne is healed in body, and that is enough for me. I will have no part in vindicating murderers and sadists. Nay."  
  
" Emma?"  
  
" When my students, the Hellions died, it was a heavy burden on me for many reasons. One of the main reasons was because their deaths really didn't matter. They were never able, for good or ill, have any lasting effect on this world. I don't want that for anyone who has their life stolen from them, to be forgotten. Yay."  
  
" Warren?"  
  
" While I arbor what was done to these poor souls, I feel that the needs of the many outweigh the few in this instance. This information is just too important to throw away. Yay."  
  
" Jean?"  
  
" I honestly wish we could release this formula and let that be the end of this whole affair. But it won't be. Others, be they private companies or rogue governments, will get the idea to start their own inhuman experiments when they see the benefits of the first ones. And it will spiral on from there, becoming a domino effect that will only get worse as time goes on. And the only way to stop it is to never let it start. I know there are a lot of sick people out there who would be helped by this information, but those who Calvin kidnapped and killed had nothing to do with making them that way. It isn't their fault or responsibility. Nay."  
  
" Hank?"  
  
" Though I freely admit tampering with the data Calvin gathered was wrong, I feel that the benefits to society…outweigh the moral concerns of how it was…gathered, if only in this particular instance. Yay."  
  
" Dani?"  
  
" I feel that if we release this information, we will be damning countless souls in the future to a experience far worse than what Rahne barely lived thru. I know this, because I have seen the apathy that society has for victims whose loss benefits that society first hand. For fear of stating the obvious, I am a member of the Cheyenne tribe, and as such, I am the only real damn American in this room. I have seen the white man chip away at my people inch by inch, taking everything we ever had. Sure, history books condemn what was done to my people now, but history never stopped my people from being victimized all over again. We have never gotten our rightful lands back, even when treaties were openly violated. The 'Trail of Tears", the equivalent of a nazi death march that killed hundreds of my people and displaced thousands more, is barely a foot note in high school history books. Let's be honest, can the majority of Americans name the tribe from whom the land they now live on was stolen? After a while, people just stopped caring, if they ever did, I mean. And that's exactly what will happen here if this information is released. Nay."  
  
" Bobby?"  
  
" I've given this a lot of thought, and I have to agree with Emma. Sarah, Wildchild and that Jack Flag guy, their deaths are meaningless. No one will really remember them. And I want more than anything to give Sarah's death meaning. But that said, I don't want her death to mean that it is all right to commit murder, so long as your goals are pure. Nay."  
  
-Oh dear lord no- Rahne thought. Everyone had voted with the exception of Jono, and Rahne knew how he would vote. The formula had given him back his face, his life. And so, Rahne knew it would come down to her. She couldn't help but feel that regardless of how she voted, she would be damning her soul.  
  
" Nay."  
  
After Jono said that, the entire room gasped in shock. After all, only Rahne benefited more from the formula than Jono…  
  
" The more I think about this, the more I have a hard time looking at meself in the mirror. Knowin' that I got me life back because of some sod who decided to play god…As much as I wanted me face back, I would never want others to suffer because o' it. But they did. And why will in the future. An' also, I don't want to tell me grand kids that all we had to do to cure cancer was to cut up a few cancer patients an' such to see what makes them tick. It's a poor history lesson, mates."  
  
After Jono said that, Rahne abruptly left the room, quickly followed by Dani who was obviously concerned about her friend. Xavier didn't bother to ask her what her vote was, and no one was willing to do so either. It wasn't as though her vote would matter, either.  
  
" And so, we have decided. The information will not be used in anyway, and what remains of the pancura formula will be destroyed." Professor X said firmly. Hank just nodded in acknowledgement.  
  
  
  
***  
  
Danger Room.  
  
" You don't have to be here, Ms. Frost. Things might get rough." Jono said to Emma Frost.  
  
" Perhaps, but that is a risk I choose to take. You are my student, X-man or not. And I'm begging you, Jono, to reconsider your course of action. No one will blame you if you don't…"  
  
" No one but me self. An' I meant what I said back there, Ms. Frost, about havin' trouble looking at meself in the mirror after what those poor souls suffered thru. I don't fancy the idea of anyone benefiting from torture in such a way."  
  
" I understand that, but you had no idea where the formula came from at the time. Are you making a principled statement here, Jono, or simply doing this so the others don't consider you a hypocrite?"  
  
"…"  
  
" Well?"  
  
" Look, I've got enough on me mind wit' out you questioning me. Diamond up, Ms. Frost, and wit' due respect, be quite. I've made up me mind."  
  
Once Frost had transformed into her diamond form, Jono concentrated and started to amass all of his psychic energy as though he intended to release all his energy in its entirety. But he didn't release the energy. He held it in, amassing more and more energy until…  
  
-Boom!-  
  
The massive explosion shook the danger room slightly and threw Frost clear across the room. It also gave Jono one hell of a headache.  
  
" That was one hell of a chance you took, Jono. You could have killed yourself with that stunt," Frost said as she walked back across the room, unharmed thanks to her new powers. She handed Jono a small, vanity mirror (made of unstable molecules, of course).  
  
" But for better or worse, it worked. I'm not certain if I should be proud of what you have just done, or deeply disappointed."  
  
Jono took the mirror and looked at his reflection for long minutes. His mouth and chest was gone, and his upper body was once again a furnace of energy.  
  
*It's not the handsomest face around, Ms. Frost, but at least…least it's an honest face* He said as he tossed the mirror away.  
  
***  
  
As Hank McCoy hit the delete button on his computer, his heart sank. All that information, all that potential… He didn't bother to turn around as he heard someone enter his lab.  
  
" If you are hear to make certain that I am destroying all the data, you need not worry. I am as good as my word, and I will abide by the decision of my peers." Hank said humorlessly.  
  
" We're just here to make sure, doc." Logan said.  
  
" It is good to know you trust my word so."  
  
" I actually think the fact that we don't trust you with this speaks more highly of your character in this instance," Jean said. " I'm sorry about snapping at you earlier Hank, but I know first hand what was done to Rahne, and I don't want anyone else to suffer like that."  
  
Hank went into one of his cabinets and pulled out the beaker that held his pancura formula. He walked over to the sink, and started to pour in down the drain.  
  
" I can't help but think how we could have helped the world with this information, what we've lost today…" He said absently.  
  
" I think we gained a lot personally," Logan said, " I think we showed that we're not animals and that we won't allow people to play god. I think that we showed today that we're not willing to sacrifice our humanity in the name of science."  
  
  
  
***  
  
Washroom  
  
As Rahne splashed her face with cold water, she tried to think about what her vote would have been.  
  
" Rahne? You okay?" Dani asked as she came into the room.  
  
" I don' know. I wish I did. I feel like such a coward, I jus'…" Rahne tried to speak, but the words just stuck in her throat. She started to get angry, angry at Hank for creating the formula and making her decide on such a horrible situation, angry at god for making her suffer, angry with herself for being unable to put the trauma of what happened to her behind her without the formula. Rahne stared in the mirror for a moment, enraged at the weak, indecisive coward she perceived. She lashed out with her fist, smashing the mirror to pieces.  
  
" Rahne!" Dani quick grabbed some paper towels to cover the wound, " Why the hell did you do that?"  
  
" I jus'…got so angry. At Hank f'r putting us in such a position, at god f'r…everythin'. Don' worry aboot it." Rahne winced. She shifted to her wolf form, and the extra skin and muscle growth instantly sealed the wound. But Rahne could still smell the blood that had escaped, and in an instant, she was mentally thrown back to the labs. She could feel the straps on her wrists, and the smell of her own blood was overpowering now, filling the room. But Rahne didn't panic. Even though her heart was pounding and all her senses told her she was back in the labs, she knew it was a lie. She knew she was having a flash back and that she was still safe at the mansion. She took three deep breaths, and found herself back in the washroom at the mansion.  
  
" Rahne? You all right? You zoned out there for a moment."  
  
" No, I'm nae alright, Dani. I'm still nae free." She sobbed. Dani hugged her and comforted her as best she could as Rahne collapsed into tears in Dani's arms, " An' I don' think… I ever will be."  
  
  
  
-The End- 


	17. Behind the Scenes

Hello, if you're reading this, hopefully you have just finished reading the fanfic " In the Name of Science", and with any luck you have given some feedback (hint, hint). And you may be wondering where I got the idea to put Rahne thru such hell. It's a long and complex story, so I'll start at the beginning. During World War Two, the Nazis performed horrible medical experiments on those who were imprisoned in concentration camps. They dipped Russian soldiers into freezing cold water to study hypothermia; they put some victims under sun lamps so hot that they burned the skin and all other kinds of torture. The vast majority of the experiments were simply excuses by the Nazis to put those they deemed inferior to a painful death. No one is known to have survived the Nazis' medical experiments, and what I put Rahne thru was likely only a fraction of what they suffered thru. But some experiments did actually yield legitimate, possibly useful data (unlike what happened with Rahne, where we knew that the data could be of use). After the war, the international community was left with the tricky question on what to do with the data. They ultimately decided to basically bury it. Why? Because at first glance, it was an easy question with an easy answer. The cons greatly outweighed the pros. The legitimate data was very small, mostly covering hypothermia. People died to get the data, and they didn't know how useful the data could be, if at all. Anyone who might have pointed out these people the nazis killed were going to stay dead and the information should be used to give their deaths meaning would be most likely, and unfairly, be considered a nazis sympathizer. (And for the record, I don't think less of anyone who disagrees with me on the issue of using the information) But, in my opinion, the question on "whether or not it is right to use medical information gained thru torture?' was never answered. They skirted the line, and took the easy way out. It was a question my eight grade English teacher asked me some time ago, and I couldn't answer it then. But that didn't mean that I never thought about it.  
  
" In the Name of Science" was actually never intended to be a stand-alone story. I intended to write a huge war story using the marvel universe, and what's now " In the Name of Science" was intended to be part of the epilogue. But I remembered something rather important. I'm lazy. Looking back now, I can't begin to imagine how long my story would have had to be or how long it would have taken me to write it. But the idea stuck with me, and I decided to see it thru. Instead of going with some modern Nazis or some such, I decided to 'paint with gray'. To 'even out' the debate, I changed a few things, while leaving the question 'is it right to use medical data gathered thru torture?' intact. No large scale war, and Dr. Calvin was a lost soul willing to damn his soul to save lives, not a cruel sadistic Nazis who wanted to inflict pain. And the data that he gathered can work miracles and save lives, via the plot devise of the pancura formula. The pancura formula was created solely to be the ultimate pro to balance out the hell that Rahne lived thru. And so the argument for the 'use the data side' becomes a lot less lop-sided and the debate is on even ground. But I left many things the same. The 'labs' Rahne survived were almost as terrible as the camps (I doubt I could ever accurately convey how horrible the concentration camps were), the guards just as evil and the experience just as devastating. Also, though you may not have noticed it, I also slipped in the question that "Can we use the data without condoning on some level what was done" via Cecelia. Her comments at the end closely mirrored Dr. Calvin's, and that was intentional. Just something to think about. As you no doubt know, I feel one way about the subject, though I certainly don't expect everyone to agree with me. I only hope that I provoked thought.  
  
In closing, I would like to thank my friend Misaim for letting me use his computer (I have no net!). For the foreseeable future, I'll be helping him with his stories, which include Moonstar and Wolfsbane as members of the New Warriors. They will have a far easier time under his writing than mine. After all, they will only be forced to destroy a perfect world, fight old friends for a cause they aren't certain of and be a part of a civil war, among other things. 


End file.
